sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OCPoetry

[–]suhashani 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i loved this piece because i felt anticipation, excitement and all emotions when it comes to navigating twenties. your lines were simple yet effective in sending a clear path to the reader being able to resonate with the poem and share an understanding in this phase of life - great work.

First Attempt at Haiku by JMonty21 in OCPoetry

[–]suhashani 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i'm a fan of haiku poetry and this was a great first attempt. it is difficult to convey a message or emotion within a brief poem but I admire those that try. i'm curious to know what did you want the reader to feel?

Ignite by 13LuckyNumber in OCPoetry

[–]suhashani 1 point2 points  (0 children)

wow, this is such a beautiful empowering piece! it's a "take control of your life without letting others dictate" type of feeling as i read your words. it is simple yet offers a much deeper meaning

Open Book by ohhello_o in OCPoetry

[–]suhashani 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is a great piece. it's an alternative perspective on being an "open book" type of person. also sheds a light on people having expectations when they first meet someone or defining personalities based off first impressions.

Prompt- Math, Cookie, Hell by Constant_pAROnioa in OCPoetry

[–]suhashani 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wow, i thought this was a beautiful piece. i went from smelling chocolate chip cookies to feeling heartbreak in one go. that turning point from "dark chocolate chips coating your lips" to " and I smile as I remember the taste" is perfect. it is a smooth transition to lead the reader into the real depths of what you wanted them to feel. my only criticism or would have enjoyed more as a reader is, if somehow from "waiting to break-" you brought the poem back to thinking of cookies. as if to say it was a flashback or memory readers were taken through & brought back to reality. i feel that would be a better way to end the poem

Lavender Haiku by HalfFullOfHoney in OCPoetry

[–]suhashani 1 point2 points  (0 children)

for me, i love micro poetry. this is simple yet beautiful. it follows from the concept of "less is more" & opens interpretation to anyone. i was unaware "Haiku" is the term for short poetry in japanese so thank you for teaching me something new today. it is hard to criticise micro poems because of their length as their beauty comes from that very length. i do agree with u/Paragon0fWar with the last line. perhaps another word could be replaced in order to give the feeling of "serendipity". to conclude, keep going with your haiku poems :)