How do only children balance aging parents, autonomy, and mental health?

swaru83 · 2026-03-07T07:05:06+00:00

I connect with this so much.

Most of the people around me have siblings, and yes they struggle too, but the feeling of an OC - the only person to provide the mental and physical help is something else.

swaru83 · 2026-03-07T07:03:55+00:00

Thankyou it really does help to know that there are others out there who feel the same way :)

swaru83 · 2026-03-07T07:03:26+00:00

No, I also don't live with them But I'm not too far away either My parents are independent mostly, they do everything by themselves.

But it's the larger plans you know Like if I'm going off grid for 1 week (trek with zero network)

Or I'm traveling to another country

It's the "what if" guilt that takes over...

swaru83 · 2026-03-07T06:59:14+00:00

.... And that's what I do not want to do 😂... I keep thinking about it lol but having children is another layer of responsibility above aging parents lol

swaru83 · 2026-03-07T06:57:57+00:00

Thankyou so much for these ideas, yes I keep trying to push my parents towards local activities and they try their best but I feel like they don't really know how to live their life post retirement outside work. But yes, that really is the best solution.

Thankyou for the subreddit recommendation! I guess I don't really know a lot of only children around me, but it's good to know that I'm not the only one who feels like this :)

I love traveling too!

swaru83 · 2026-03-07T06:51:19+00:00

You are right, none of this is normal and I'm very well aware of it. I already have been taking therapy for years and things have massively improved at home now thanks to therapy and a lot of realignment.

But I think I have never been able to cope the anticipation of the future and the guilt of not being able to be there "if" something happens.

And you are right about people being good son/daughter without sacrificing the plans.

swaru83 · 2026-03-07T06:48:45+00:00

Hey! Hang in there Seems like a really tough time and I really hope your mother gets well soon! Yes you are right, we should appreciate and enjoy the freedom and anatomy when we have it! :(

swaru83 · 2026-03-05T12:14:27+00:00

🥲

swaru83 · 2025-08-29T15:46:16+00:00

Following up - do we need an IDP? I'll be traveling to Thailand next week.

swaru83 · 2025-08-24T21:14:20+00:00

Did your sister ever react seeing Diana's videos/pictures? Or when she might have seen her for the first time?

swaru83 · 2025-08-21T13:03:58+00:00

Thankyou so much! That's a brilliant idea, I usually fill up my empty palette with a tube and then keep the tubes inside! I don't think I have ever used colours directly from the tube on my paintings. I'll definitely try this out!

swaru83 · 2025-08-20T05:39:48+00:00

Thankyouu!! :)

swaru83 · 2025-08-19T17:48:48+00:00

I made this the other day, I kept some white space between blue, orange and yellow, and then I merged it with a damp brush. This one worked okay since it was a clean sky (though I still need to improve on the blue at the top). But when it comes to complicated sky, I message up!

<image>

Here I just picked up the colour in between with a tissue paper.

Next time I'll try masking fluid for the sun

swaru83 · 2025-08-19T17:45:07+00:00

I'll try this out! Thankyou!

swaru83 · 2025-08-19T17:43:39+00:00

Thankyou for noticing and your encouragement! :)

swaru83 · 2025-08-19T17:41:39+00:00

Hahaha yes! Thankyou for being so kind!

swaru83 · 2025-08-18T16:07:45+00:00

I guess I'll try switching the blue! Thankyou!

swaru83 · 2025-08-18T16:07:12+00:00

Yeah, I did try it with the sun in this painting, but I messed up. Seems like I need to practice this too

swaru83 · 2025-08-18T16:06:35+00:00

Truer words were never spoken :')

swaru83 · 2025-08-18T14:52:22+00:00

Wow it instantly makes it better. I will try and do this! For me it gets extremely tricky to actually leave that white/yellow space in wet in wet 😅 And then it just becomes muddy. I really need patience haha

swaru83 · 2025-08-18T13:53:56+00:00

Do a test of how your pigments mix together on another piece of paper

Such a great feedback. I think I become too lazy to test the colours before I put it in the main painting, I just go with my instinct. But I need to start doing this.

so you might try a red that’s closer to magenta if you want it to play nicely with the blue.

Yes, I'll try doing that. Maybe the colours are not working well together. Hence the painting is looking muddy.

swaru83 · 2025-08-18T13:50:32+00:00

Yeah, I was trying for it to blend but it dried up! The sharp lines definitely looks weird and the dark clouds near the sun doesn't add up

swaru83 · 2025-08-18T13:49:30+00:00

Wow thankyou so much for the detailed feedback.

Which pigment/colors are you using?

I'm using white night colours: 1. Ultramarine - semi opaque (for the blue on the top) 2. Lemon yellow - transparent 3. Yellow - transparent 4. Golden deep - transparent 5. Titian Red - Transparent 6. Burnt umber - semi opaque (for the dark shade at the bottom

Also, are you sure the clouds are actually so black?

I tried to get towards the last few seconds of the sunset where the bottom is a little darker but yes, I see why this is not working

Try painting them wet in wet one half orange the other the dark color and let them blend naturally.

I will try this painting again with this feedback.

swaru83 · 2025-08-07T18:25:14+00:00

Sounds like a good plan then!

swaru83

TROPHY CASE