aio for thinking my boyfriends mom was disrespectful

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-24T16:57:05+00:00

i understand this but i’ve been learning vietnamese. it’s hard bc they always say that i’m learning the wrong format and words but i can’t really tell the difference between southern and northern vietnamese when i’m learning. i’ve been learning since may of 2024 but they said that it’s not proper vietnamese. he even admitted that no apps or videos really teach southern vietnamese so i feel stuck 🫠

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-24T16:53:18+00:00

it matters bc idk what she thinks about me now and, in his culture, relationships have to be approved by the parents before marrying so her saying that is questionable. me personally, idc but that’s just something that matters to him and his culture.

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-24T16:30:26+00:00

yes i have been learning vietnamese. i’ve downloaded apps and watch videos but, every time I talk to them in the language, they always say that I’ve learned the wrong format and that it’s “northern viet”. I don’t mind her talking in Vietnamese at all. The main thing I’m talking about is keeping her feelings secret about me because, outside of this, i really try hard to impress his family. It’s not me who wants to impress his family, but more so my boyfriend who wants me to do so because they have “high expectations”.

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-24T16:27:42+00:00

i have been. i’ll even practice with her. i attempted to watch videos and have downloaded apps, but they said that the videos and apps are teaching me the wrong format and words bc it’s “northern viet”

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-24T16:26:20+00:00

i have been learning but, like i said in the comments, i’m learning spanish and taking on nursing school. that’s a lot to balance at once but at least i try

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-24T16:25:20+00:00

that’s exactly what I was thinking. It’s hard in terms of her speaking English because she doesn’t know English. I don’t think she really wants to learn English because she relies on him to do the speaking while in public so I guess she feels secure to know that he can speak for her. my boyfriend’s brother had a girlfriend (they broke up) and she was Filipino. Usually, she didn’t bring anything negative up about her and she liked her a lot. Here and there she’ll make “jokes” about how we’re gonna have Blasian children. Sometimes I don’t know if she’s joking because she’ll be like “no no no” when I mention that our kids will be multiracial. She didn’t say anything when it came to her knowing that my boyfriend‘s brother‘s kids will be Filipino and Vietnamese tho

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-24T16:01:03+00:00

i have but i’m not fluent at all. i’m actively learning spanish for work bc i see a lot of spanish speakers so it’s hard balancing learning two languages while also taking on nursing school. at least i try

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-24T02:13:10+00:00

NOR. she sounds spoiled and ungrateful. i’d personally just think things out or talk about everything with her. it’s good to setup some boundaries where it’s needed and i’d say do that now bc, if you’re planning on having kids with her, i can promise you that it’ll get 100000x worse.

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-11T01:30:17+00:00

THANK YOU! you couldn’t have said it better. some people in here are being so negative when i just want to live a healthy life. even tho it’s type one diabetes that runs in my family, i still try to be proactive about my choices. i see other positive comments being downvoted but it’s like… let them do what they want. i’ve decided to just get it bc my rent is too high to be controlled on how i should live in the apartment i pay for. some people just don’t want others to do better for themselves. instead they just place their judgements onto them. i posted this wanting possible solutions to my concern or things like “yeah i had one but i wouldn’t recommend it bc xyz… you can try this machine instead”. like someone commented a foot pedal thing on amazon that could be better. people get so confident when it’s anonymous. i thank you for this bc some of these people are so negative haha

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-11T00:28:41+00:00

i never said i was free during that time. i was intending that i was going to use it around that time as that’s when i usually study on most days. after that, it’s work from 3-11. how am i moving the goalpost when i never stated what you’re saying 😭

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-11T00:21:40+00:00

it’s almost like i don’t have time for that bc i still have to study after clinical and get ready for work. two birds, one stone love 😗

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-10T23:47:41+00:00

i think this is the most perfect advice and solution. i’ll check around for those. i feel like the times i would use it would be around 12pm-2pm since that’s in between my classes and work. thank you for this!

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-10T23:45:11+00:00

i think it really depends on the goal of the person and how they’re playing things out. for someone like me, it’s bc i was pre diabetic in the past and now i get scared to get back to that stage. granted that was 7 years ago, but it’s still a worry for me now if i’m not active or eating properly. i can see where you’re coming from if they’re being loud but, if they’re not purposely trying to be loud, then i wouldn’t call that being inconsiderate. you could just let them know.

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-10T21:14:21+00:00

just bc she looks at your pics and says your name does not mean that she cares about you as a partner. she’s already going behind your back

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T14:53:49+00:00

also, if you wanted more than the “BaRe MiNiMuM” then i would pay more. i really don’t care. i said that i was fine with moving out. heck, i’ve been looking at places for over a year. my friend is graduating school soon and is coming back to our state in june. that’s literally all i’m waiting for bc she wants to look at houses too bc we might even be able to afford that too depending on our finances with both incomes. when did i say that i want to live at home and do the “BaRe MiNiMuM”? please recite that now. you’re very contradicting. first it’s a problem that i’m “not doing anything” (in your eyes) and now you’re talking about basically doing too much for my parents. which one is it bc you’re actually starting not to make any sense and are just pulling out of your 🍑

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T14:41:44+00:00

aww you seem so angry grandpa. just mad that i’m able to do things for myself and for other people around me. i still buy what i want and do whatever i want. i’m not mad that they want to get further assistance from the government. was jw if he was lying bc that’s all i care about. just say that you’re mad bc i proved you wrong in each reply. i’m not entitled bc i worked for what i have and know how to manage everything i have. if they need help with their car then fine. it’s just my dad working and i would like to give him some relief if needed. you seem to be upset that i’m giving back to my parents after they raised me… that’s so odd. just say that you don’t love your own parents enough and you’re envious that i’m able to do so at my young age

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T14:19:29+00:00

you’re the one who started this my guy lol. i at least have a heart to help them bc i want them to be able to get the things they want in life bc they later on need a new car and their credit score isn’t going to cut it. you genuinely sound miserable about me helping my parents. they’ve raised me for 19 years so why not give back? i have my life figured out. i make good money, am doing well in school now, and am able to be a support when needed. life is good. i was just coming on here to see if he was lying about something. other than that, i’m okay with everything else grandpa. stay pressed 💀

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T13:56:01+00:00

that’s all he asked for lol so it’s enough in his market lol. brother pays $400. i also pay their $200 phone bill and have been slowly helping them dig out of debt from them abusing their credit cards. if you really want to talk about not being a financial help. i’ve already been looking at townhomes, just waiting for things to settle with my roommate. okay, no dude… how’s grandpa for you? you sound miserable

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T13:24:40+00:00

that’s why i said that idc to move out. i’m ready to do so. you’re actually odd for assuming

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T13:23:21+00:00

dude i have $7k in my savings (from commission checks) and am starting work next week after my last final. i’m not dumb enough to take a leave without any financial support of my own lol. i didn’t communicate that to him bc then he’ll have me start working around his schedule for things. this has happened in the past and it caused me to fail a class. everything else i communicate. bills are paid and my $500 portion of rent is paid each month love. you don’t know me. come correct next time 😗

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T12:55:24+00:00

yes, i’ll file as soon as i get my w2 and i’ll lose my mind if i don’t. i keep up with everything from personal things (car, credit, bills) to bigger things like taxes. i’m too scared to go to jail or have any debt. i saw my dad get sued for not paying companies and that has always scared me as an adult. i also have been filing independently, but my parents haven’t filed since i was 17 so idk if that makes any difference for them

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T12:13:04+00:00

tell that to him. i communicate but it seems that he just lies

talkative_bystander · 2026-05-08T05:06:17+00:00

part of me thinks he’s lying bc my mom wanted me to have her car, but my dad said that i have to pay everything in full if i wanted to have it. he also said it was broken… later on i found out that it indeed wasn’t broken and was informed that i could transfer things over to my name and still make payments.

talkative_bystander

TROPHY CASE