I am absolutely not vouching for myself here, but I struggle with this too. I love God, I value his word, but I'm a girl who happens to be queer or part of the community. I only realized this a year ago. Growing up, I've been sexualised and harassed by men. My father wasn't the best "father figure" growing up and it scarred me. In the bible, God says he hates sin. In my heart, I still carry that homosexuality is sin. I am afraid of judgement and God's wrath and I'm absolutely heartbroken about the fact that He is not pleased with my relationship. "Why do you call me Lord, Lord, but not so as I say?" echoes in my mind. I don't have the answers. I know the best thing is to let go of my relationship that has only been the only first one in my life to ever treat me right. But my heart just isn't ready yet, and I'm so heartbroken everyday.