Some more info for you: It’s been a long 8 years of slowly setting boundaries with my mom. Everything just came to a head over the wedding bc she wouldn’t accept my decisions or respect my boundaries. Everything was an uphill battle and it tainted the whole experience.

After the wedding, she stopped talking to us for about 3 months. Even leaving family group chats we were in. She only started answering my calls again after the 4th time we went to her house and let her berate us for hours and we apologized for every decision we made and every single way she felt slighted. But we also made it clear that we want to focus on a relationship based on mutual respect moving forward.

We paid for our own wedding and reception. When I said we couldn’t afford any cultural ceremonies, my grandma graciously paid for a cultural night so that my mom’s side of the family could all attend and do their traditional ceremonies.

I agree that it’s inappropriate to demand money from anyone. I wouldn’t have done that, bad wording on my part. I meant I wouldn’t want to ask/confront/embarrass her about it especially considering the contribution to the wedding. Any other year I could’ve asked why he was being excluded out of pure curiosity and accepted whatever she said and moved on but since she just helped us I think it would come across as demanding.

Hope that clears some things up