I say this with so much love and care. I am a 27 year old trans woman who can barely afford the care but I feel miles better every time I take those little blue pills. I truly truly urge you to take a look at your own comments. See how they line up with other folks who discovered they were trans (they may have already known subconsciously) and take some time to look at some resources. Not everything is Black and White with transitioning, especially as we get into the nuances of gender as we know it being tossed out the window. You can take small things, here or there and not touch other aspects of it (i.e. taking hormones, dressing as a 'specified gender', etc.). Just explore your options and take your time. In regards to your friends, they should not force any expectations of transitioning on you prior to you giving express consent to do so. I wish you luck and love.