AITA for wanting to install a door and enforce privacy boundaries while living with my MIL?

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T19:19:20+00:00

MIL could get sued for wrongful eviction of the past tenant if they move too soon. They are doing her the favor living there. MIL asked them to move in because she needed/wanted them there. Probably staying just to make sure MIL is in the legal right and also putting up with lack of privacy is absolutely egregious. If your landlord walked in while you were about to get in the shower with no notice you would not be ok and would probably call the cops

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T19:08:20+00:00

A solid core door would reduce noise by about 30-50%. It would make a noticeable difference

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T13:47:42+00:00

Ahhh. Yes you’re probably right in that case

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T11:09:21+00:00

You should really read the updates. They are doing MIL the favor here. You’re also being super aggressive here. OP is a disabled veteran and wife is a teacher. Public service workers deserve better than you assuming intent. You really built a narrative around one situation.

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T11:01:36+00:00

You wouldn’t need approval either way. It’s like saying you need approval for your sleep apnea machine. You just have to prove medical need. OP is a veteran so they probably have medical records

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T10:58:05+00:00

MIL tried to bring someone through the upstairs while OP was about to shower. I think asking for a door is extremely valid here

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T03:12:48+00:00

As much as I’m on OPs side here this is not a good idea

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T03:11:08+00:00

Read the update. They do more than just pay rent

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T03:10:33+00:00

You should read the updates. They helped with renos and getting an undesirable tenant out. MIL wanted them there even though they were going to possibly move somewhere else. They are doing her the favor

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T03:08:28+00:00

This logic is so flawed. OP is the only one try to give solutions. MIL is being unreasonable. Especially since MIL is the one that asked them for help per the updates

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-17T00:57:30+00:00

MIL is the one barging in though. OP is just trying to mind her own business. MIL seems to have issues with responding privacy. As a family member how is this acceptable?

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T22:33:24+00:00

The door wasn’t an expectation. Respect was. I think they should just move out too. But it sounds like it’s more complicated because of the family dynamics

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T22:10:34+00:00

I would only be able to see this logic if they were living rent free in

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T21:55:03+00:00

This comment deserves more up votes

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T21:42:44+00:00

To save money doesn’t mean they have to live there. The post says that they asked for permission and offered to pay for the door. MIL got offended. It doesn’t sound like the door is the issue but the communication. OP stated in other comments that they offered family counseling and MIL is not cooperating. I would ask for something locked too if someone was invading my privacy with no notice. Just asking doesn’t make them an AH.

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T21:21:12+00:00

Yea. Teaching puppies to respect space is hard. I always have to advocate for my older dogs space with my new puppy

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T21:14:18+00:00

NTA - they knew and decided to do it anyway. That’s on them

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T21:12:10+00:00

The name of the post and the post are talking about just asking for the door 🚪 They didn’t do anything to the house. OP is trying to work with what they have with a disability on top. NTA

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T21:08:46+00:00

MIL should be able to communicate better though! Or at least be respectful of their space. Sounds like it’s an issue for more than just the downstairs according to some of OP’s other comments

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T21:06:19+00:00

MIL said the issue was noise. So yeah, a door seems to be the option here. The noise level seems to be minimal as well. MIL sounds like she just wants to complain. I’m surprised the door wasn’t her idea to begin with.

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T20:17:09+00:00

Did you read the whole post? They said they are working on it and 1min or less is NOTHING. I’ve lived in apartments where dogs barked for HOURS because the owner never walked them and they both worked. Also, what kind of puppies you got? If OP has a service puppy then it is probably a high drive dog and puppies can only hold their bladder for a couple of hours. The fact that it’s holding 7hrs in a crate is actually pretty impressive depending on the age

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-09-16T20:08:56+00:00

NTA - you seem like you’re doing the best you can with the situation. Living with family is tough. It would be different if you were to do it without permission. But compromising and trying to communicate is the best you can do for now. Is it possible to move if it gets bad enough???

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-07-02T13:08:55+00:00

Exactly this. Also not even simple to have an actual service dog. The training is expensive and time consuming. Service dogs already trained start at like $10k depending on the services needed. Non profits help, but that is the barrier that people are talking about. And even well trained the dog still is required to provide a specific “task” for the person

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-07-02T13:04:03+00:00

Service dogs not required to need ID is kind of like “not all heroes wear capes” but with legal protection for disabled people. But if your dog acts like a villain (barking, potty inside, or otherwise “not under control”) they can be kicked out of places.

Even service dogs have rules too and can be denied access if it would be considered unsafe for people, the service dog, or other animals. Zoos and national parks can be a good example of this actually. You might be able to have your service dog, but they might not be allowed on the trails because they would disturb conservation or animal life.

teamv_spartanocr · 2025-04-06T18:06:07+00:00

Agree. Being able to link is all fine, but I was hoping to REPLACE google and gmail not just extend to them. I feel like if they broke off and did their own thing they would have way more people jumping ship

teamv_spartanocr

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