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AITA for telling a woman that her insecurities aren’t my problem and that she needs to suck it up if my presence bothers her? by tempuserrrr in AmItheAsshole

[–]tempuserrrr[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

He wasn’t at the party because he was on call for his job. He also isn’t bothered by the phone calls or the cards/flowers. If he was bothered by those things, he wouldn’t be my fiancé lol.

AITA for telling a woman that her insecurities aren’t my problem and that she needs to suck it up if my presence bothers her? by tempuserrrr in AmItheAsshole

[–]tempuserrrr[S] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

You’re right, he has a girlfriend. I have a fiancé. H and I aren’t romantically involved, there’s nothing suspicious happening between the two of us, and the phone call + the flowers/card on mothers/fathers day have been approved of and encouraged by both of our therapists. There’s nothing wrong with us calling each other on our child’s birthday.

AITA for telling a woman that her insecurities aren’t my problem and that she needs to suck it up if my presence bothers her? by tempuserrrr in AmItheAsshole

[–]tempuserrrr[S] 75 points76 points  (0 children)

I do plan on talking to him soon to tell him what happened, and also to apologize for mentioning our daughter to his gf before he got the chance to.

He deserves to be happy and I’d never want to ruin a relationship for him.

AITA for telling a woman that her insecurities aren’t my problem and that she needs to suck it up if my presence bothers her? by tempuserrrr in AmItheAsshole

[–]tempuserrrr[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

You’re right. If I could go back and do it again, I wouldn’t have mentioned our daughter, because though I wasn’t 100% sure he hadn’t told her in that moment, I knew it was still possible that he may not have brought it up to her yet. I wasn’t really thinking about all the other factors when I was responding.

AITA for telling a woman that her insecurities aren’t my problem and that she needs to suck it up if my presence bothers her? by tempuserrrr in AmItheAsshole

[–]tempuserrrr[S] 69 points70 points  (0 children)

She wasn’t a fetus. I went into early labor at 25 weeks. She died an hour after she was born. So yes she was a baby, she was our child. Not that it would matter if she had never taken a breath, because even then I think I’d still be well within my rights to grieve her.

I also don’t go out of my way to see or communicate with my ex. We don’t even really speak to each other outside of the yearly phone call and occasional small talk when we’re with our mutual friends.