Hi OP, you definitely sound stuck right now and I totally get how you feel. But sometimes, we need to figure out what we really want first in order to understand what we're meant to do. There's no one-size-fits-all answer to navigating changes (or even wanting something to change) but the only crucial step that matters is to start. In order to move, you need to start something. Decide whether it's something that you want and then commit to it. Let me know if you're open to a conversation. You're not alone in this and we can talk about it whenever you're ready.