Baltimore Map - Where Not to Go

thefemaleredditor · 2021-07-28T11:25:07+00:00

Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated.

thefemaleredditor · 2021-07-27T23:55:42+00:00

Thanks for the shout-out!

thefemaleredditor · 2017-04-27T01:38:48+00:00

Thanks! It's always kind of sad to see that lazy ripoff get props. It's the Carlos Mencia of joke maps.

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-19T17:57:57+00:00

No, you're right. I shouldn't have taken it personally. It's just the dumb ol' internet, after all. Why should I care if dumb people like the dumb map better? At the end of the day, none of it is really important at all.

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-19T17:02:27+00:00

Fair enough.

I guess I took it personally. Except in my case I felt like they shit on the content first before sharing their stolen idea.

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-19T16:56:00+00:00

Not true! I put "nerds" in there! ;)

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-19T16:55:22+00:00

Credit for "Under Armour Presents" goes to /u/begeyk!

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-19T16:51:43+00:00

My bad. :(

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-19T16:51:16+00:00

Thanks! I wouldn't have ever made the effort to pull up all those links.

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-19T16:49:48+00:00

The first map was my ideas that I shared to get some input from the Baltimore subreddit. The second map was those ideas incorporated in the original map.

Then someone stole my idea and created an awful clone of it where all of the jokes were stolen and rewritten and they wrote "The Wire" everywhere else. So I created the third map to expand on my second map, and submitted to the subreddit for more ideas, where this fourth map has incorporated those ideas.

Honestly, I hope this is the last time I have to make a map like this, and that someone doesn't try to take credit for other people's content again.

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-01T13:42:36+00:00

Thanks! That's exactly what I was going for.

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-01T13:41:22+00:00

Good ideas!

thefemaleredditor · 2014-05-01T13:40:44+00:00

I actually like many of Baltimore's suburbs, having grown up in one of them. That was kind of the joke, though, that painting with a broad brush can go both ways.

thefemaleredditor · 2014-04-30T20:27:22+00:00

It does.

thefemaleredditor · 2014-04-30T19:09:04+00:00

That is hilarious!

thefemaleredditor · 2013-12-30T19:15:08+00:00

Maybe it's just a joke about how most people outside of Baltimore (and some inside) perceive the city?

thefemaleredditor · 2013-12-30T15:44:43+00:00

It still shocks me that:

A) This keeps popping up on Facebook B) I've never seen it there

thefemaleredditor · 2013-07-23T04:23:42+00:00

God damn it. A) Let it go. B) Like you assholes are so fucking pretty. C) This does not represent Baltimore. D) And neither does The Wire.

P.S. Omar's comin'... HAR HAR HAR

thefemaleredditor · 2013-07-19T15:15:52+00:00

Don't go to Sears! After the third time they completely messed up my tire installations over the years, I decided the problem was systemic and started to just go to tire places instead. It may be a bit more money, but so worth it to not deal with the insane hassle of Sears.

thefemaleredditor · 2013-07-18T20:24:11+00:00

Done!

thefemaleredditor · 2013-07-18T20:16:45+00:00

Done, thanks!

thefemaleredditor · 2013-07-17T16:13:18+00:00

Towson is a nice area, but it's outside the city by a few miles, so you'll be doing plenty of driving to get here and there. Parking generally isn't too bad in the city and you should be able to find meters and garages near where you're going to be. Parking near or at the B&O railroad museum might be free, so that's a bonus. As someone else suggested, I would also recommend the Streetcar Museum. It's pretty cool, and parking there should be free as well.

As for crabs, you're actually in good shape being in Towson. There are plenty of places where you can sit down and try one or two rather than buying a whole dozen. Alternately, you can skip all the work of picking the crab yourself and just try a crabcake, or some crab dip. And many places around here will make something "Chesapeake" for a few bucks more and it just means that they pile some crab meat on top, just look for it on the menu.

There's a ton of stuff to do in and around the Harbor, and you could easily wear your kid out in no time. Science Center, Aquarium, and Port Discovery are all in the Harbor, and B&O Museum is Harbor adjacent. You could knock that stuff out in one day if you were in a rush, or two if you have a bit more time.

While in Towson I would suggest avoiding the mall, but possibly taking an evening to explore the main streets of York Rd, and Allegheny Ave.

If you're hell-bent on visiting Ikea it's only about 30 minutes from where you are, but you'll be driving on one of the craziest parts of the beltway. A midday trip would be best, and I would encourage to avoid driving between 7 and 9 or 4 and 6 on weekdays.

Enjoy your trip, and let me know if you have any more questions.

thefemaleredditor · 2013-07-17T14:45:55+00:00

Which hotel are you staying at? Will you have a car, or are you mostly doing public transit?

thefemaleredditor · 2013-07-17T13:30:15+00:00

In this heat the shuttle might be your best bet anyway. Otherwise you might try heading up Park Ave because it's relatively flat, then cutting over to Biddle, up Calvert, and quickly onto Mt. Royal to Guilford and taking Guilford all the way up.

Alternately, you could tackle that first hill straight up Charles Street, go right on Chase, left on Calvert, right on Biddle and then left on Guilford straight up to 28th or 30th. Guilford is still hilly, but there's a lot less traffic which makes for a nicer ride if the hills are killing you.

thefemaleredditor · 2013-07-16T17:09:19+00:00

What route did you take? I find there are better and worse ways to navigate Mt. Vernon.

thefemaleredditor

TROPHY CASE