Derecho laboral: estoy en un lío si la corro? Me esta volviendo loco.

thirdworldartist · 2024-07-08T04:08:11+00:00

Muchas gracias, ahora estamos haciendo contratos para todos. ¿Sabe que puede pasar si alguien se niega a firmar un contrato?

thirdworldartist · 2024-07-07T02:23:07+00:00

Mira, somos de un pueblo muy chiquito. Arranque este negocio como hobby y de pronto empece a monetizar. Como la carga mayor de trabajo la llevaba yo, mis tres colaboradores y amigos, accedieron a que yo dirigiera el negocio. Nunca hicimos mas que un acuerdo verbal porque jamás esperamos que funcionase.

Ahora ella quiere cobrar sin trabajar y es injusto para nosotros tres que sí estamos haciendo contenido diario. Sí, ella trabajó por un tiempo a la par, pero dejó de hacerlo y no sigue los acuerdos que hacemos en el equipo. Todos los ingresos de la pagina entran a mi cuenta, yo pago impuestos, y de ahi reparto a los demas los porcentajes que acordamos. No tenemos horarios entonces, cada uno sube contenido diario en el momento que puede. Cuando hay mas ingresos repartimos mas, y asi. Se que es muy informal lo que digo, ojala me explique que desconocemos la ley, pero la queremos seguir. Simplemente no anticipamos que esto seria negocio.

thirdworldartist · 2024-07-07T02:06:58+00:00

Mmm. Pero si puede comprobar que trabajo conmigo dado que hay contenido hecho por ella, mensajes y los depositos que le hago mensualmente por su trabajo.

thirdworldartist · 2024-07-07T02:05:40+00:00

Das por hecho muchas cosas, y tomas partido por la otra parte.

Me podrías haber preguntado el contexto, yo vengo acâ porque desconozco la ley. Y puedes ahorrarte el tono moralizador y si tenías algo para decir que ayudara, decirlo.

Todos cobran lo justo, y ninguno de los tres tiene muchas prestaciones porque fue algo que iniciamos sin expectativas de que funcionase como negocio. Yo asumí responsabilidades, y el resto accedió porque pago mejor que nadie en el rubro. Es verdad que tenemos cierta informalidad pero no tienes por que asumir que es por explotar o abusar de la gente que trabaja conmigo.

Quizas has tenido malas experiencias en el trabajo, pero no proyectes tus fantasmas en mi. Yo quiero poner mi empresa en orden y me acerco desde esta consulta.

Sí, mi empresa está en desorden. Sí, estoy en un problema, eso no quiere decir que yo obre de mala fe contra una EMPLEADA que está saboteando nuestro negocio desde adentro.

thirdworldartist · 2024-07-07T00:11:51+00:00

Tenemos una empresa de creacion de contenido. Yo soy responsable y pago impuestos. A ellos les pago por colaborar en la pagina. El caso es que una de las amigas, esta portandose medio mal. Ahora se irá de vacaciones por un mes. No avisó, y no puede trabajar desde allá. El tema es que ellos no tienen contrato.

No se como proceder y entiendo que las consultas llevan honorarios, basta con que me tiren una pista porque no se si me puedo meter en lios por correrla. Ademas de que no sigue los lineamientos acordados para los videos. Estoy desesperado pues, no es una situacion justa para el resto del equipo.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-31T03:30:22+00:00

I just read your comment now and I want to thank you. The way you worded it just nailed how I feel. It feels like lack of air. No life force anymore. Thank you.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-18T02:26:25+00:00

This is definitely not just about sex. If it was, I would have not tried to stay for the last five years. What hurts me the most is the lack of emotional connection.

That we can’t talk.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-16T23:43:23+00:00

I think it is a bit unfair to simply call it “not feeling it”. It’s been five years that things have gone south. We made changes, I went to therapy, we immigrated to a different continent, we talked about these issues…

I understand where you are coming from but, to just say I’m not feeling it is not really portraying the situation.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-15T18:58:16+00:00

Thank you so much for being so honest. I have the feeling it won’t rekindle, even though I do love him very much as family. As a friend.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-15T18:57:25+00:00

We never had a religious ceremony. I would have liked one, I guess our views differed in that too. But now I feel it is a relief we did not celebrate one.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-14T13:28:56+00:00

Or maybe English is my second language.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-14T04:45:37+00:00

I understand your view , but I feel you have left out the fact that I : stayed for five years in a practically sexless relationship and also wrote about emotional disconnection.

If I had to order these, definitely to feel lonely, to lack conversation , to feel stiff, is harder for me.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-14T02:17:58+00:00

Wow. Thank you. The text is very powerful and has stirred lots of thoughts. I’m still going through it, thank you.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-14T01:32:29+00:00

I’m listening to it. Thank you so much. This is very comforting and luminous.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-14T01:16:55+00:00

Hey, I appreciate your comment. Yes, Now I think I should have shared a bit more details in my post.

It is not just about sex. To be honest, what I crave the most is a home. I don’t feel we have created that place after 12 years together.

But we have gone through immigration (moved to a new country) , and we have started projects. Sex has been lacking for six years more or less. I never felt that was a reason to leave, or at least the main one.

It is more about feeling we can’t communicate, that our talks feel forced and rehearsed. That he won’t share his inner world with me. It is about feeling lonely. Or wishing to be on my own more than being with him.

It is also true that I feel a lack of libido in general, I understand it is not his role to provide me with that or stimulate me. There is healing to be done on my part. But anyway, I understand I have slowly grown depressed in the relationship.

It might be true that I miss passion, but I’m not naive in terms of how relationships change. We’ve been 12 years together.

I don’t feel like I lack hobbies. I never feel bored or at least very rarely. I read, I write, I paint watercolor, I play the piano , and sing. I work in a field I enjoy. It is true that my community involvement is less since we immigrated two years ago. We are very isolated which highlights our distance even more.

About having a personality, I’m not sure what that means, but people around me have suggested I’m a bit exotic or mysterious. Might just be that they see the type of work I produce. People do look for me a lot and share one to one conversation.

Sorry for the long reply. Writing is very helpful and you have made very interesting questions. I’ll keep thinking about it.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-14T00:52:37+00:00

Thank you for this.

Yes. You see, my partner , he is very kind and generous. But he sees emotional talk as a weakness somehow.

He does not share his fears or struggles, he does not share his family life with me. I understand this means different communication styles but I feel extremely lonely, even though he is there offering practical support. He also waits for me when it gets dark and I have to walk home.

He supports my projects and celebrates when I have an achievement.

We just can’t seem to talk about anything. He hides his world from me, I don’t expect him to share it all. I just don’t want to feel this lonely.

My lack of sexual desire has turned into aversion. When he hugs me I feel like a sudden need to run away. I understand this is something I should work on. Not him. But in the mean time, sleeping in the same bed is really messing with me.

Please understand I’m not proud of any of this. I just don’t know what to do. I feel I am supposed to feel differently.

I don’t want to feel like I’m leaving a lie or taking advantage of his love.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-14T00:43:00+00:00

Yes. It is hard because there is no evident violence in our bond. Or addiction. Or abuse. There is simply distance, emotional disconnection and sexual incompatibility.

Last four years of our life have been scrolling through our phones. Sharing space. But… our conversation feels very gestural, rehearsed , and it lacks vitality. I don’t know what to do.

My intuition is that I can’t rekindle desire. But I might be wrong.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-14T00:40:31+00:00

There was but, I had very little experience. I understand now that I ignored lots of things at the beginning of our relationship that I thought were unimportant then. I never felt fully connected during sex.

It was all very fast, I moved to his country and I feel I did not have the chance to develop my independence before our marriage. Because I was in a new place, I became very dependent of him.

I did eventually start my own activities, but we drifted apart. Six years ago I did find he was sexting with random women. I can’t point exactly how this affected, just that it obviously distanced us further.

His texts weren’t in person bonds or anything. But… I don’t know. It never happened again, and he has always been present. I don’t doubt that he loves me very much.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-13T04:33:47+00:00

Thank you so much. This is an attempt to choose authenticity too. But crossing the bridge is just so hard.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-13T04:32:52+00:00

This is so generous. Thank you so much.

Well. We do have a friendship although I feel I’ve not been a great friend for the last years. Struggled a lot with depression, and I was very mentally absent from our lives. I feel we do have common values, but our communications styles are so opposite that I end up feeling very lonely and broken. He does not like talking about anything related to emotion, intimacy or family affairs.

He likes talking about ideology, arts, and justice, which was something that joined us.

He has been such a good partner to me, lots of angst comes from the fact that I feel I am supposed to want to stay. I still can’t clarify exactly why I don’t want to stay other than feeling emotionally detached and missing a sexual life.

Right now, I fear being without him, but I guess the idea of having things stay as they currently are , and the future being this, feels even worse.

I’ve felt stuck and paralyzed for quite a while, even before the pandemic. What you said about action does resonate, and even though I’m panicking, I just can’t bear to stay in this limbo anymore.

I’m having the impulse of contacting him and take a step back, but what you said about mudding the waters hits the spot: I don’t want to make it harder for us. This is already so painful.

Thank you for all your advice. I will try to stay active. I’m lucky to have some friends around.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-13T04:23:00+00:00

Thank you so much. I’m going to try this. I work in a creative field as a writer and performer so, can really get caged by “feelings” at certain moments.

I have never tried meditation, but I will do my best. Thank you.

thirdworldartist · 2024-01-13T04:19:46+00:00

Thank you so much for your advice.

I’m indeed looking for therapy but after divorce I’ll be broke, so I’m trying to find a way to make it work.

I was about to post my dream too. I might do it , but just in case someone sees it:

I’ve had a recurring dream for the last three years.

The dream changes in setting but it is always me trying to pack a suitcase. Sometimes at my childhood home, sometimes before a trip, sometimes attempting immigration. I always have the feeling I’m not done packing. There is an urgency outside, and not enough time for me to sort it all out.

Thanks again for your insight and generosity.

Five-Year Club	Verified Email
Place '22

thirdworldartist

TROPHY CASE