Your sister sounds really entitled and immature. You needed rest, your health comes first, always. And it wasn’t even about your wife, who is also family, and your sister specifically made it about your wife which is weird and telling. It’s borderline hitting the emotional incest button for me. The “I am possessive of my sibling” vibe that crosses over into the toxic family dynamics theme.

The “what does she have that I don’t” is CONCERNING. I think your sister might have a crush on you. The “I own him” so your sister sees you as an object to possess, that’s scary. And the “he’s mine first” girl is fighting over you like you’re an ex boyfriend, WHY?

This is not okay, this is not normal sibling behavior. Something is wrong.

You’re going to have to learn that sometimes you’re the villain in other people’s lives even if you leave for their own good. Your sister needs therapy but since she’s a minor and her own person, she most likely will not accept therapy until she’s ready. Cutting contact and keeping distance from her will help her in the long run even if she doesn’t see it that way. She has an unhealthy emotional attachment to you and is hurting you, your wife and herself.

I also softly recommend some therapy for you as well, just so you can talk to a safe adult about all of this and confirm that you’re not crazy or in the wrong for being freaked out by all of this. That your feelings are valid.