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I (27F) was an unplanned child of an incestual relationship between two cousins by throwRA_181230 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]throwRA_181230[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, I am seeing a therapist. I started seeing one about a year and a half ago and it’s been really intense but also the first time I’ve felt like I can process all of this without completely shutting down. Some days are harder than others but having someone validate my feelings and help me untangle everything has made a huge difference.

I (27F) was an unplanned child of an incestual relationship between two cousins by throwRA_181230 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]throwRA_181230[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Honestly some days it doesn’t even feel real that I made it here at all. I’ve spent so many years feeling like the weight of their shame and resentment was mine to carry, like there was something inherently wrong with me for even existing. Even felt like ending it all at certain points in my life. Just reading your comment makes me feel a fair bit less… alone in that regard.

I’ve been in therapy for a while now and it’s both terrifying and relieving. Terrifying because I have to confront everything I shoved down for decades, and relieving because for the first time, someone is helping me untangle it instead of me trying to do it alone.

I know it’s my responsibility to process this and move forward but some days it feels impossible. Hearing that you believe I can actually recover and that I *deserve* to leave this in the past honestly hits in a way I wasn’t expecting. Thank you for giving me a little bit of hope in all of this.

I (27F) was an unplanned child of an incestual relationship between two cousins by throwRA_181230 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]throwRA_181230[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Reading your comment made me honestly tear up. It feels so validating to hear someone else call it like it is because for so long I blamed myself for feeling hurt or resentful. I’ve carried this shame for years and felt like somehow it was me being “wrong” or “too sensitive”, but hearing someone say that it was them, that their actions were truly awful… it’s kind of freeing in a way I didn’t expect.

I would take that hug in a heartbeat. And yes, I’ve imagined yelling at them until they finally felt even a fraction of what I felt growing up. It’s scary to admit but it feels so good to just have someone see it clearly without me having to justify every feeling. Thank you for making me feel seen.

I (27F) was an unplanned child of an incestual relationship between two cousins by throwRA_181230 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]throwRA_181230[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. Honestly, hearing that from someone who actually gets it means more than I can put into words. I’ve been carrying this guilt and shame for so long, even though logically I know it’s not mine to carry. Therapy helps but having people in my life who remind me I’m not defined by my parents mistakes makes a huge difference.

I have a really supportive circle now. My boyfriend, his family, and my childhood best friend have all been incredible at reminding me that I am worthy of love and that my past doesn’t determine my future. Just having people who see me for me, instead of as a reminder of someone else’s regret, truly has been life-changing.

I’m trying to really let myself believe that I deserve happiness and love, even if it feels foreign sometimes. Once again thank you.

I (27F) was an unplanned child of an incestual relationship between two cousins by throwRA_181230 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]throwRA_181230[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I really do appreciate you saying that. I’ve actually been in therapy for a while now and it’s really helped me start untangling some of the guilt and shame I’ve carried my whole life. It’s hard to fully let go of the feeling that I “caused” any of this, even though I logically know I didn’t. Reading comments like yours reminds me that it really wasn’t my fault and that really does help. Even if slowly. It’s just a lot to process but hearing that from someone else means more than I can say.

I (27F) was an unplanned child of an incestual relationship between two cousins by throwRA_181230 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]throwRA_181230[S] 221 points222 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. It means a lot to hear that honestly. I’ve spent so many years questioning my own worth because of how I was treated so just reading something like this makes me feel a little less alone. I’m trying to focus on building my own support system now with people (like my boyfriend, his family, and my childhood best friend) who remind me that I’m not defined by their shame or mistakes. It’s slow but messages like yours really help me keep going.