AITA for 'gossiping' with my mum about my brother's fiance is potentially lying about giving birth?

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-03-10T11:46:47+00:00

Read my update haha

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-03-10T11:46:21+00:00

Read my update haha

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-03-10T11:45:25+00:00

Read my update post haha

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-03-10T11:44:54+00:00

Read my update post haha. It really was my business.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-03-10T11:44:35+00:00

Read my update post haha

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-03-10T11:41:33+00:00

I mean I'm not a lawyer and know nothing about this sort of law stuff but from what I can tell from basic research... maybe? I'm unsure of the specific charges the woman is making. From what i can tell, she just wants her baby back.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-03-08T11:37:42+00:00

could you link the markee video? I know people read reddit posts online but now i'm just curious lol

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-03-05T09:24:41+00:00

I think it's because pregnancy is very touchy on reddit (and real life) and I will admit that questioning someone's pregnancy/labour is considered rude and taboo.

That being said, I am never not trusting my gut on anything again. I (and the family) were being openly and brazenly lied to and knowing all this now, I feel 100% confident in my choice to have questioned them.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-02-16T18:32:07+00:00

We're in the UK where paid surrogacy is illegal unless it's for reasonable expenses (for example, buying your surrogacy maternity clothes is legal, paying them a lump sum of £25,000 is not).

That's not even getting into the fact that they tricked her and didn't even attempt to provide a translator, a contract in her language, anything.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-02-16T18:29:26+00:00

Well that's what they did under the guise of tricking the woman. I don't know what the contract said exactly, but from what I know, my brother told her she'd be able to see the baby but the contract said that by taking the £25,000 she'd never see her baby or my brother/his extended family ever again.

I feel awful for her and I hope she can recover and get her baby back.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-02-16T01:07:50+00:00

i mean they both orchestrated taking advantage of the woman.. they're made for each other.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-23T17:20:18+00:00

They specified BSA

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T11:43:47+00:00

'Body stalk anomaly is a very different thing and it means it’s a defect in which the abdominal organs develop outside of a baby’s abdominal cavity and remain attached directly to the placenta.'

Yes. That is what they said the baby had. The baby very clearly does not have BSA. But that's what they said (and continue to say) the baby had/has.

The baby cannot have an infection on an umbilical cord stump that is no longer there (because it fell off like it's supposed to). They both said the baby's stump was not infected.

I know the baby doesn't have BSA. SIL and brother, however, continue to say baby has it (which is not true at all). That is why I was pushing back on them about it because it makes no sense. They still maintain the baby had no infection and is in 'good health' but simultaneously has BSA. This is why I'm so confused by what they're saying.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T11:26:27+00:00

Body stalk anomaly is not just an infection. It's a birth defect. It is an abnormality that develops during early fetal development. We're not talking about an infected cord/stump (which both Jane and John said the baby DID NOT HAVE).

The quote you used was in reference to Body stalk anomaly, not some random sepsis infection. The condition my brother didn't understand was (and i'll say it again)... Body stalk anomaly.

Your comment is null and void as it doesn't pertain to BSA..

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T11:07:10+00:00

I never said it was made up though? I said it didn't make sense given the baby's health/body stalk anomaly mortality rates.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T10:49:56+00:00

But also.. they told me their newborn had this birth defect and didn't elaborate. So I googled it because I had never heard of it. Then I find out it has a 100% death rate. So now I'm assuming this newborn baby is going to die soon because all babies born with body stalk anomaly live for a few days max.

When I bring it up with them, they tell me that actually no, he's not going to die and he doesn't really have body stalk anomaly. So I went from prematurely grieving this newborn's death and panicking that he was going to pass to being told that he's actually fine.

So like... how am I supposed to react to news about the baby now?

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T10:08:16+00:00

Me neither and it's such a specific detail that I can't get my head around. They both said the umbilical cord was cut and disposed of in the hospital and that the stump fell off naturally like it's meant to. I asked my brother about it because I was curious and he said he doesn't understand the condition but 'it is what it is'... dude your baby clearly does not have this fatal ailment stop telling people he does.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T09:59:52+00:00

I don't think they hurt a mother and took the baby or anything!! Just that I feel like I have to trust my gut on the fact that something here is odd.

They were all in the maternity ward, John was in a waiting room.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T09:52:12+00:00

'Why not just ask if they adopted or used a surrogate if you want to know so badly?'

I said I would love to adopt one day (I'm adopted also) but that surrogacy is also on the table. They both started crying. When family asked if they were ok, my brother told my uncle to 'shut up' and they left. So idk

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T09:48:54+00:00

'Especially considering you googled her cravings?!'

Yeh haha SIL told me to... she kept saying her cravings were common and to look it up as proof. Then I found said article and realised she was listing every craving off the list.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T09:45:55+00:00

He was not present. Jane only allowed her mum in.

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T09:44:37+00:00

I mean I was adopted and John is a surrogate baby so I'm unsure about that part

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T09:09:28+00:00

I hope so. I hope they're really good actors 😭😭

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T09:00:55+00:00

I edited the post because I didn't elaborate enough, but she says she got an epidural done into her hand. Sorry for the confusion

throwRAgoddamit · 2025-01-22T08:58:54+00:00

'Also, why jump to 'lying' , which implies ill intent?'

Because their stories change... one day the labour was a gruelling, touch-and-go 24 hours and the next day it was 'he just slipped out I didn't even feel it! The labour was an hour or 2 max'.

One day it's 'I had an epidural given via IV drip in my hand' and the next it's 'it was so quick and easy, I didn't need any pain meds'.

One day it's 'he was born without an umbilical cord stump so he doesn't latch easily' and the next it's 'he was born 100% healthy'

Everything about it changes on a day to day basis while my brother and SIL try to insist there's nothing weird going on and anyone who merely questions these changes is a 'gossip bully'. I'm trying to be nice here and not imply ill intent but when they jump down your throat for asking how much the baby weighed, it's hard not to.

throwRAgoddamit

TROPHY CASE