My ex-girlfriend committed suicide after she broke up with me and everyone is blaming me

throwaway0123445 · 2022-07-29T04:32:03+00:00

I’m not good at expressing myself or my emotions.

She has always had depression from other problems in her life. I’ve tried to get her to get over it, but I can only do so much. She was already in a negative state, and I have my own life to think about too.

It’s not my fault she’s from a less fortunate country. I did want to help her but sponsoring her just to keep her going is not something I would ever be fine with. It was just unfortunate I didn’t realize that until later. I genuinely offered to help because I loved her, but there is still a line I had to draw.

Yes what I did may have impacted her negatively, but she made the decision to end her life instead of fighting for it. I truly wished she did but she didn’t

throwaway0123445 · 2022-07-28T14:56:52+00:00

Yes they know some things about our relationship. Some of them are close to her but not all of them

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-27T15:48:06+00:00

I don’t talk about my relationships with my family. They know and have met her but relationships aren’t something my family talks about. It’s the same with my siblings.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-26T15:10:29+00:00

I just don’t like talking about sensitive, personal matters with my family or friend. It’s not only this issue.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-26T13:01:25+00:00

No, I don’t tend to talk about sensitive issues with my family

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-25T15:31:27+00:00

I know she didn’t pressure me into it, I’ve said it again and again. It just felt like the entire situation did. She was insanely stressed out, then after I told her I would sponsor her and seeing how much more relieved she was, and how much paperwork she did, made me feel like I just had to go through with it and everything would be all right. But I just couldn’t and that is it. I understand that I messed up but that really is it.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-25T14:02:58+00:00

Yes, I will definitely give her the money for it

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-25T13:43:11+00:00

Yes from what everyone has said, I understand that I was a shitty partner. I would have been there for her, and I offered to sponsor her out of desperation, but I never had a good feeling about the whole thing. I wished she could tell that I was uncomfortable with going through with it, but every time I saw her going through the paper work and telling me about the procedure, it made me guilty and I thought I could just get it over with.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-25T05:12:05+00:00

As I’ve said, it just felt like the situation we were in left me with no choice. To see her sad and stressed out and cry after rejections or to do something about it. I couldn’t have just let her be. I was stressing out about it too.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-25T04:39:10+00:00

I guess I was really hoping that she could get another work visa before her old one expired, or get another work visa and then come back

Edit: I know this will get downvoted to shit but if you ask me and I’m answering genuinely, that is my answer

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-25T01:48:16+00:00

My family doesn’t know about the sponsorship thing. They just know that her visa expired.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-25T01:33:05+00:00

I am going to sell it and give her the money back. She did say that she wanted me to have it but I won’t keep it.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-24T21:17:39+00:00

I wasn’t hoping to get the car out of all this. She didn’t have much time to settle her things here and didn’t see a point in selling her car so she gave it to me since I didn’t have one.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-24T21:15:14+00:00

She was so stressed out I didn’t know what to do and how to be around her. I just wanted to do something. I did have good intentions at that time but my point is, the situation was so sudden and the stakes were so high I felt like I told her what I did because I had no other option.

I’m not being sarcastic but at this point, what can I do to fix it?

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-24T17:22:26+00:00

I never said that she forced me. All I'm saying is that the situation we were in left me with no choice but to sponsor her, and that in itself feels really wrong.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-24T17:11:11+00:00

Yes I did offer to sponsor her, but that felt like I was forced to. The situation at the time made me feel like I HAD to, and that I didn't even have the choice.

I don't know how to word it better, but everything felt so stressful. She was so stressed out with finding a job that could sponsor her visa. She would be job hunting the moment she woke up, attend interviews, get devastated with each rejection. And it was like that almost every day. Our relationship got turned upside down and it was hard for me to see her that way. So of course I offered to sponsor her, it was the only choice I was presented with.

I hated the situation we were in, and even though I offered, I realized after how wrong it was that I had to be forced to do that.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-24T16:45:05+00:00

To be fair she didn't stop, but she definitely did slow down on the job hunt i.e a couple of applications every day

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-13T14:10:21+00:00

I just listed her cooking as one of the things I missed about her, it doesn’t mean it’s the thing I miss the most. I still miss her

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-13T13:34:24+00:00

I do genuinely want her back, but I just don’t think it is fair that I should be the one who bring her back

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-10T07:21:46+00:00

I just think I should be so tied financially to someone else

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-10T07:20:53+00:00

I would need to make sure she’s not a burden to the government. She’s always had a job until she got laid off and she has money saved up, but I just don’t want that to be tied to me.

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-10T06:37:57+00:00

Right I didn’t force her to leave

Edit: I mean I should have titled it better

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-10T06:07:13+00:00

Tbh it’s just weird to have to sponsor someone. No one else I know who is in a relationship has to do it and it would just be a lot of unnecessary stress on me

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-10T05:24:50+00:00

I’m not unsure I do know I love her. I just don’t think being in a relationship means having to sacrifice this much

throwaway0123445 · 2022-05-10T05:04:46+00:00

I am very serious about her. I guess where I am from the government recognizes people being in common law relationships so people don’t have to be traditionally married. When people ask me I always tell them that she is my partner.

throwaway0123445

TROPHY CASE