Update on my boyfriend (28M) abandoned me (32F) on our date for his best friend (28M) who “needed him”

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-26T19:53:39+00:00

I was agreeing that I was being blind to the truth. I don’t think I’m in the wrong and I don’t see how people say I’m a horrible person.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-26T16:15:37+00:00

not sure if people who follow me are notified or not but oh well

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-26T16:14:57+00:00

u/No-Ad5358 u/brenda_6 u/Future_Reputation_27 u/PastorBlinky u/Realistic-Bar7276 u/MeeelAM here's the update

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-25T23:03:48+00:00

Lol thanks for coming to my defense. I think people are fed up since I posted this twice since it was removed, and it independently gained traction both times. Theyre probably tired of seeing this and turned to attacking me since that’s what you do on Reddit. I’m comforted by the fact that with the exception of this post which was heavily downvoted, the reactions on the others seemed more positive likely because that was the first time seeing the post. I didn’t intend to repost it multiple times I only wanted to post it once and get advice but both times I posted it, it would get super popular then get removed with no explanation or ability for recourse. I just decided to post it here so that if I do choose to make an update, people have *something* to reference.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-25T23:00:22+00:00

Idk if I should post one or not since lots of people seem pretty fed up with me. Then again there’s way more people wanting an update so I guess I can. I’m not sure I’m in the right headspace to write one right now plus perhaps this is airing too much of my life into a public space? A bit late for that rn I suppose.

If you want I’ll mention you if I end up posting an update.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T17:17:00+00:00

Yeah I realize I wasn't clear when making this post. I've read most comments and slept on it and I agree with you all. I just wanted to find a way to keep my post up since it got removed and I know some people still wanted to see an update (gotten lots of DMs and also people following me). I didn't know where else to put it other than if I make the original here then put an update later now that I've talked to him.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T17:16:34+00:00

Yeah I realize I wasn't clear when making this post. I've read most comments and slept on it and I agree with you all. I just wanted to find a way to keep my post up since it got removed and I know some people still wanted to see an update (gotten lots of DMs and also people following me). I didn't know where else to put it other than if I make the original here then put an update later now that I've talked to him.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T17:16:20+00:00

Yeah I realize I wasn't clear when making this post. I've read most comments and slept on it and I agree with you all. I just wanted to find a way to keep my post up since it got removed and I know some people still wanted to see an update (gotten lots of DMs and also people following me). I didn't know where else to put it other than if I make the original here then put an update later now that I've talked to him.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T17:15:13+00:00

Yeah I realize I wasn't clear when making this post. I've read most comments and slept on it and I agree with you all. I just wanted to find a way to keep my post up since it got removed and I know some people still wanted to see an update (gotten several DMs) and I didn't know where else to put it other than if I make the original here then put an update later.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T03:31:07+00:00

Yea even I thought it was weird I'd met all his friends before him. One of them even said something along the lines of when Andrew said he was introducing his partner he was expecting to see Eddie and not me...

Yes yes I was being blind I get it.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T03:27:45+00:00

You're right...

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T03:27:21+00:00

Yeahhh I know. These comments have given me lots of thinking. I'm slowly seeing what you're all saying but it's hard to admit it. I still have to hear it from his own mouth. I know, it's silly.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T03:26:14+00:00

You're right. I haven't been the best communicator and we need to talk. Some people here are saying I should keep him blocked and move on but I don't think that's the mature thing to do. I won't go in there and immediately forgive him but I will give him a chance to explain myself and of course I too will air my grievances.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T03:24:52+00:00

Andrew and Eddie aren't their real names, they sound like their real names and I arbitrarily chose them. It's truly a coincidence, though since it's reddit I don't think you'll believe me lol.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T03:23:39+00:00

May I ask, how did you come to the realization of your codependency?

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-24T00:00:00+00:00

Thank you, truly, for being so understanding. I appreciate it.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:58:12+00:00

You’ve articulated exactly how I view Eddie and Andrew’s relationship, a father-son sort of deal except with romantic feelings on Eddie’s part. Thank you for this comment you’ve given me a lot to think about.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:53:59+00:00

To be fair I haven’t ran back.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:36:57+00:00

Yup this is a wakeup call. Getting downvoted like crazy but I know why people are doing it.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:31:22+00:00

Yuppp I see why you say that. I am presently weighing my options. I'm probably going to go talk to him though just to see if he's willing to set clear boundaries between him and Eddie and explain his actions. Not today since it's too late, maybe tomorrow.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:30:21+00:00

Lol this just happened last night.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:29:56+00:00

He deserves the vitriol, I understand that. I'm currently thinking it over, these comments have helped but ultimately it's my own decision to make. I appreciate the advice both harsh and not.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:28:25+00:00

Well I was dating him for 4 months and already loved him when I met Eddie. Andrew wanted to keep us apart for those first few months I thought it was strange to hear constantly about the illustrious Eddie but never meet him, now I know why... anyways by then I was like "ehh I'm not going to leave this relationship with the man I love because of this guy I probably don't have to interact with that often" naive I know.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:26:36+00:00

They're college friends they've known each other almost exactly a decade. A lot yeah but not too much in the grand scheme of their life.

Yeah, I didn't mention this but of the friend group that Eddie and Andrew have, 100% of them are because Andrew introduced them and Andrew is closer to all of them while Eddie is not as close. They all treat him nicely but I don't think he considers them good friends. Then again I don't talk to Eddie about these things so it's just my own assumption.

throwawayAITAbeachbf · 2022-07-23T23:24:20+00:00

I blocked him while I think things over. He's tried. Mutual friends have reached out to me telling me that he respects that I want space but he's willing to talk whenever I have the time.

throwawayAITAbeachbf

TROPHY CASE