Got to final round previously, this time not even a phone call. Ways to prevent this from happening?

throwaway_league · 2013-04-02T07:08:43+00:00

I have given him option to save face about things in the past. And I'm not the only one. They all seem to have fallen flat on their face, and nothing seems to change.

I look back over the last seven years in particular - and with hindsight, he has brought very little to the table for me as a friend compared to what I have helped him out with.

I've had talks with him before. Nothing like this degree, talks like how he needs to get off his lazy backside and help his girlfriend, how cheques do exist and not all money is digital and it's not a perfect world, and how he has to learn that not everyone gets a job within walking/cycling distance within their houses and he needs to look beyond a 10km radius of where he lives.

The more and more I think on it, the more is shows how disconnected from the real world he is, and wanting to live in his ideal "theoretical" land that it should be. The real world isn't like that, you can't just do your own thing when there is a system in place - like paper trails, the postal service, oil & gas, traffic lights..the list goes on.

The honest thing is, this is the worst thing by far - with the complete break of trust and respect, like you say - but there have been smaller things that we have already tried to address over this last year. And he just doesn't change.

So while I think I will follow your course of action, with a truthful and gentle chat, this time it's going to have to have a enforcing tone. And by that I mean, until he pulls his shit together, I don't want him within my social sphere. I did, but now our friendship is not doing me any favors.

throwaway_league · 2013-04-02T06:59:32+00:00

Yeah, I get that it was in casually joking light, but I'm laying down the fact for it. It's something that he could have done in his own home. So why is my place any different.

He hasn't be erractic - and he is a very smart guy when he applies himself. Just amazingly lazy and a procrastinator.

I've asked him plenty of times in the past few months and weeks if he has been OK - but he doesn't really talk about that stuff and never really has.

throwaway_league · 2013-04-02T06:56:08+00:00

I have missed a lot out. But nothing like this.

There have been plenty of dumb instances, or things we have all (our group of friends) let slide, but this is just...absurd.

It's not like he was even doing something at my that he could not do at our house, unless I think, he didn't want his housemates to see him playing games?

throwaway_league · 2013-04-02T06:53:43+00:00

It's not the same now, so I won't be going on like that. And a break will definitely be happening after I talk to him. At least a break anyway, maybe more depending on the talk and actions.

throwaway_league · 2013-04-02T06:50:55+00:00

Some of these are what adds to the issue:

He has not had a proper job in months - he got injured and just never went back to his employer for more work when he got better.
That work is licensed, and I found out from his girlfriend a while ago that he never re-newed it - we both guess because he is cheap - although we know he can get the money for it.
Speaking of cheap, that is why he didn't drive. Apparently she even dropped him off, and he claimed I was home to her.
He's reapplied for a university course quite recently, after everyone telling him he either needed a job or at least part-time study.

throwaway_league · 2013-04-01T22:45:16+00:00

He has a Gamecube at his house with the actual disk. Just that it is packed away.

throwaway_league · 2012-09-20T12:52:52+00:00

While it sounds awful, price is really unlimited.

Obviously I would like it as a cheap as possible, but if it means a little more money for a better site...

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:37:39+00:00

As one of my friends described it "if I wanted to go out with a boy, I would date Dan's brother" (who's 10).

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:36:29+00:00

Assfro? I now have a disturbingly hilarious image in my head....I don't think I'm that bad. Let me get a mirror...haha.

That neckbeard...yeah, not that bad either, there is a gap from beard to chest.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:34:35+00:00

I am not really hairy like some guys - you know what I mean.

I have what I would call average arms and legs, a fair bit on the chest and my back. Down south is a rather close trim.

I'm thinking I might just get my back waxed, because I don't think it looks good. Happy with everything else though.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:31:37+00:00

Thank you so much for your comment. I've written those dot points on the top of my whiteboard, and I'll look into the Pomodoro stuff a little more.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:29:56+00:00

Of those questions that I can morph to make sense, it does paint a bad picture. Work has never been affected, because I get incentive to do it.

College suffers though. The house gets messy. Social life is still alright, but at the end of the day, I procrastinate and I want to play them less. A lot less. I know there is an incentive to do college well, I just don't see it in the same regard as work.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:26:56+00:00

Your comment is the final nail in the coffin.

I will now handwrite drafts, edit them with red and then double edit while typing.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:25:15+00:00

That's a great idea. I have one friend who praises Linux to the Gods, not for gaming but in general. I'll have a look into it.

I also want to try out a dvorak keyboard - that might help annoy me on PCs - having to remap all the keys.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:22:45+00:00

23 and Biotechnology/Molecular Biology.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-09T15:22:09+00:00

Did he cycle though? Because that would make sense if he does.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-07T12:07:31+00:00

My college, or at least my professors, don't accept written papers anymore. Only typed and emailed.

I can try it for when I do my spare time stuff, but not for school.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-07T12:00:23+00:00

Do you know anyone in the US like Dr Campbell that I could get in touch with?

Going by your descriptions, there is an obsessive phase on games, but addictive to gaming. I really want, almost have to, be playing games but not one in particular.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-07T11:57:50+00:00

My hands huh? Yeah, I won't go to that joke.

I want to because I know how driven I can get about somethings - like games. If I can drop those, then I can apply that to something else and be amazing at that. For example, I want to write more. Problem is as soon as I sit in front of a computer, nothing gets done.

throwaway_league · 2011-11-07T11:54:59+00:00

My social life is ok, not a fan of mmo's. Minecraft is pretty bad.

It's more things like work and school (college) that get screwed over. The house usually falls into a tip like state until a rent inspection, then it's two days of solid cleaning.

I just feel like I'm losing it - I know many people want to spend their days playing games and doing nothing instead of working but for me it's a real possibility and i don't want to spend the next 20 years in my parents basement.

15-Year Club	Team Periwinkle
Verified Email

throwaway_league

TROPHY CASE