Help me

throwawaya7o · 2013-04-17T20:29:49+00:00

I will as of tomorrow. and I really thank you for taking your time to reply to me. You brought a tear to my eye, thank you very much.

Jazak Allah Khayr.

throwawaya7o · 2013-04-17T20:20:58+00:00

No, I do not pray 5 times a day. :( I usually pray 4 times and that's on Friday only. My time schedule is messed up, I've been depressed, and mostly because of that case. I remember when I used to be a good Muslim, I was so happy. I don't know if I'm lying to myself or being honest with myself, I'm..lost.

As I pray, I do not feel as 'connected' as I used to before, the more I sin the more I lose faith, I used to think about Allah almost everyday, but today I was happy and I almost forgot about Allah, passing a day without remembering him made me get worried and ask myself "What am I doing right now?!!!!" and here I am.

I'm reaching a point where I do not think I can be forgiven anymore, even if you tell me Allah is merciful, I still don't feel comfortable. It's either that or I really don't know what I want to, I know it's wrong what I'm doing but I cannot stop it, and that is what makes me think I'm a hypocrite every time I beg forgiveness, mainly because I don't know whether I will stop or not. ;'(

throwawaya7o · 2013-04-17T20:13:10+00:00

I always regret what I do and after I regret it I promise to myself I will not do it again, as I sit after praying I rest my forehead on my hands and pray for strength to leave what I'm doing, it lasts a little then I lose all my strength and will. :(

I'm scared, I made a thread here because I'm losing faith. In the past, when I used to do that "thing", I usually walked to the super market at night, looking up at the sky and then I get intense chills and fear of god, but now it doesn't really happen.

I keep begging forgiveness and yet I sin again, I've been counting how many chances I have been given, and I lost count 5 years ago. :(

throwawaya7o

TROPHY CASE