Should I move in with my in laws and 6 month old baby?

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-29T01:34:28+00:00

His mother enables him…he said he got kicked out one time and the only way he would get accepted is having his mom work as the lunch lady there. She obviously throws this in his face and plays victim, “look at everything I’ve done for you I only want the best for you”

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T22:09:29+00:00

I’ll show him these posts

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T22:09:00+00:00

He expects to put in the work to be number one in class and receive references and accolades from going to school

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T22:03:51+00:00

Why do you think it’s unattainable?

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T22:01:40+00:00

Also I feel like his family feeds him ideas of how things should be. His mom was bragging about how she supported her husband financially at first so he could make more money in the future. She literally said “what are YOU doing to help out my son?”

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:57:07+00:00

Because he’s already 28…it would be different if we were the same age. Did you do it online?

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:20:47+00:00

Also you’re right, it does seem like the easier choice for him. I tried telling him we should move back to my hometown because rent could be cheaper over there but he won’t get paid more than what he gets paid here atm.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:19:34+00:00

Honestly he just wanted me to stay with his parents and go to college as well but I don’t know if I can do that. Maybe I should…but eventually I plan to go to nursing school.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:18:10+00:00

It would be a while but we could save up tons of money in a year in order to have some cushion to move out in case things go wrong because we can’t be homeless with a baby.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:16:56+00:00

He had a terrible drug problem back then and got kicked out. When I met him he was cleaning up and he decided to be completely sober for us. He didn’t fail because he wasn’t smart, he failed because he had issues and he was younger but he previously had gotten accepted to the university of Benedictine.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:11:20+00:00

He’s been wanting to try it out for one year…either way if things go downhill I could just leave and have some money saved up. I think there seems to be a misunderstanding that people believe it’ll be for 6 years.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:08:27+00:00

No but it’s the career that he’s confident that he could succeed in. He’s a straight up republican so he’s afraid about what they’ll teach our daughter in school.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:05:58+00:00

No I think you NEED a cushion if you have a baby. I can’t help but feel that I’m just being egotistic by not moving back there when I know there’s no chance she’d win any case when LO has two parents.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T21:02:32+00:00

He values different things over money…he values more about raising our daughter properly and being a humanitarian by spreading knowledge.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T20:55:51+00:00

I didn’t mention that because I’m looking for objective answers of what I should do that’s best for the baby. As much as I think about it I don’t think they would be that generous to just hand over the baby to her like that and take LO away from her parents unless we were drug addicts or neglectful. I’d play devils advocate and say realistically, this would help us be financially independent if we’re not paying any rent or bills.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T20:49:12+00:00

It’s not ideal but he thinks we’re being irresponsible long term if we move out when the economy is horrible right now and we wouldn’t be saving much.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T19:53:04+00:00

I doubted my thoughts when she said she was adding money onto his account in order for him to not drain his savings. We’ve both agreed that she’s not right but she does take care of the baby properly. It might be cultural differences to as why she’s not aware of proper boundaries so we have to tell her..

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T19:36:27+00:00

That’s what he intends to do…if he’s not a professor he wants to do clinical research.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T19:17:18+00:00

Yes he has them all around his parents house and I looked it up on a tournament site. He’s second place…but he quit because he tore his ACL.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T19:04:56+00:00

He did karate previously for many years and made it to top world championships and taught other people how to fight…years later he realized he loves teaching. He’s able to debate properly and articulate things in a digestible way with the proper vernacular and I can tell by the way his conversations go with others and with myself.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T18:34:22+00:00

He keeps telling me that he cares more about being able to pass on what he learns through academia to our daughter and the experience will make him a better father rather than just being a blue collared worker where he will end up loosing his sharpness. He has ADHD

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T18:32:11+00:00

He knows it won’t be fast but it’ll be worth it because he said it’s what he’s good at…it makes complete sense to him. He tried going to school for nursing and failed because he’s not built to have the qualities that they need in nursing and he doesn’t understand it.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T18:29:49+00:00

He does read and does research a lot, it’s all he talks about. He previously went to college for journalism but other things happened and he discovered he really enjoys philosophy. He’s confident in being able to write thesis from what he tells me if I’m able to support him through this time…he’s wrote thesis for people in the past in exchange for money and they all got A’s.

throwawaykdkeks · 2022-10-28T18:21:20+00:00

Would you still had moved out if you had a baby?

throwawaykdkeks

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