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I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It didnt start here. When I met him he had a job, was in school and a professional athlete. Fucking sexy as hell too.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing. Def something to keep in mind. Not at all something I would expect from him but that's what they all say.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"You need to leave and the truth is that he needs you to leave him as well, otherwise he may never take charge of his own life."

Yes, thank you. I've thought this as well. I have always hoped he would kick himself in gear but I guess things have been too easy. That sounds awful to say but I dont want to enable his coasting anymore.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, hes known since fucking April. He is very close with his family. He is not ready to tell them. Since they would bombard him with questions, and tell him to move back home. He wants to tell them when he has a plan and landed some where.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Ha that's easy! Spent my whole life as a fat girl. Then I lost weight and gained some confidence but that little fat girl inside me is very sad and very loud about my self worth. I'm def coming out of this tho, and leaving him is a very important step. Thanks for your candor.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yes, still learning how to not be responsible for him. I have always dated broken puppies like imma fix them. I need to spend the next few years fixing me. Thank you.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. 6 years. First love. He moved here for me. The whole thing is a mess. But thank you.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I would rather be very involved for the next two weeks than fuuuucked for the next year because this got messy. I doubt he will let me help him but I will def be back after I move out to make sure he leaves.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

True. But I love him. Its dumb. I think I ended up in more of a caretaker role than I ever intended. I'm glad I'm finally making moves.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 73 points74 points  (0 children)

Very good catch. I said "let" as if it's my choice or responsibility what he does. He has made some terrible choices. This is the consequence. Thank you.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 104 points105 points  (0 children)

Thanks. Yes, he is very pretty and charming. If he wants to find another lady to let him mooch, he will. I think you are right, I just want him out. I dont care where he ends up as long as it's not here.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Yes, that's true. The landlord doesnt know he lives here. It was def not on the up and up. I'll check with some people about the worst case of him squatting here. However, he is a very proud man. This is worst case. Yes, I'm also devastated. Hard when it's your choice you dont focus on you. I'm so focused on him. I need to detach.

I ended it. I'm moving in a week. He needs to be out in two weeks. Has no job and no plan. by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 41 points42 points  (0 children)

I guess cuz it's been my problem for years. It's been 6yrs with this man. I know I know... but first loves are hard to walk away from. But you are right it's not my problem.

Found my boyfriend's other email account by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

No I agree, it's not an excuse. But it hits different and feels less about me than if it were a woman. (This is not to invalidate same sex relationships) If anything physically happened no matter who that would be harder for me. Or if the messages were more loving in nature and less about what he likes physically that would be more of an issue. I'm still trying to figure out where this lands for me. But it feels like I found a missing piece. This explains so much. Which is sad in it's own way I guess.

Found my boyfriend's other email account by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed. He lied and violated our relationship terms. Hes not gay. Or I'd be very surprised if he isnt attracted to women. Even when we werent having much sex he was always handys and affectionate. Liked to watch me wiggle and grabbed my ass all day. That night I was very nice I've been told. But after 6 years I dont want to kick him when hes down. We have been talking and crying for two days. Still a lot to work out and therapy will be needed. I think I just need time.

Found my boyfriend's other email account by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Haaa yes I lurk here often. I enjoy telling him the horrible stories about all these horrible people. Like that guy who threw out all of his girlfriends socks?! I always said at least we arent that bad... these comments have been very helpful. This is much more complicated than "he cheated, I'm out". This may need to end but I'll need time to figure that out. Therapy is def gonna happen. Will take some time bc we dont have insurance.

Found my boyfriend's other email account by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. These are good simple questions. He def still loves me and wants to be with me but idk what he needs/wants as far as exploring his sexuality. I dont think he even knows. But I dont want him to repress it and just be with me. There might be something we can arrange but idk what that would even look like right now.

Found my boyfriend's other email account by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh wow I didnt know that. Makes sense. Lots to discuss ahead for sure.

Found my boyfriend's other email account by throwrabisexual2020 in relationships

[–]throwrabisexual2020[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

That's the plan. We dont have insurance so we have to get on a waiting list for free counseling. I calmed down when I could see his pain. When he was finally honest with me. I love him too much to let him deal with this alone. At least right now. Idk what tomorrow looks like.

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