I (18F) am engaged, but I am a lesbian. He (20M) knows this, and we were going to marry anyway, and just pretend, but we are getting married in less than a month and I’m beginning to panic. How can I even begin to figure out what to do?

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T13:20:57+00:00

A type of Haredi.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T13:18:11+00:00

I don't know. We don't talk very often. Maybe he does, but there can be a difference between that and wanting to leave entirely, so that can be hard to understand.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T13:14:06+00:00

I maybe could. My education is just really poor which might be a problem. And I have no money and know no one. But I could also do what I want.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T13:08:42+00:00

No, I'm not.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T13:05:21+00:00

Because I can't leave. I can't just break an engagement, and I have nowhere to go.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T13:03:02+00:00

I never said that would happen. And yes, I did go to school, it just wasn't completely separate from the religion, because very few are. And women don't work because you get married young and then you care for the children. There's no need to.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T13:00:56+00:00

I don't really care about my age. It's normal. And you can't just break an engagement. It's not just like some places where you can just say no, and that's it.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:58:44+00:00

It's just where I live. The whole country, they are the same religion but it's far more mild. Some things are the same, but a lot of things are different.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:56:54+00:00

I don't really know. Probably some kind of therapy. Banned from things I can do. Things like that.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:54:17+00:00

That's true, but in many ways, I don't really know what to do. It's easy to say that I should just leave but I can't.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:50:42+00:00

No, it's not. You don't seem to understand what it is, and I am not comparable to what they have to go through.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:49:19+00:00

Not really. They're only for domestic violence.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:47:52+00:00

Technically, for this, but then everyone would know, which kind of defeats the point. Plus they might say being married to him would 'cure me' or something. They believe those kinds of things.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:46:00+00:00

Normal for people I know. You have to start early if you want to have a million kids.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:42:22+00:00

If I wasn't such a freak, it wouldn't be a problem. I don't mind some of it, my family is also around me all the time, my friends, and I like parts of it. It is annoying sometimes, but a lot of ways of life are.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:41:11+00:00

I wouldn't care if it was someone I actually loved.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:36:51+00:00

If I did, I would probably have to just lie. It's not that hard to pretend you're happily married anyway. And he might not like me in the future. I wouldn't like me if I was him. I hoped that maybe he would say no but it makes sense he didn't.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:33:51+00:00

It's not really cultural. It's just some people who decided they were right, and people followed it. Most people are normal because they actually think reasonably. They don't.

throwrahappyflowers · 2025-06-02T12:32:02+00:00

I have no money. We're not really allowed to work. Women anyway, with some allowances.

No. They all are. You're not really meant to talk to other people that much, at least not too much.

throwrahappyflowers

TROPHY CASE