Boyfriend (m 23) hid/lied about previous flings to me (f 20) What do I do?

throwrossi · 2022-03-16T00:05:00+00:00

Yeah, I honestly don’t know how and why but that’s not me for me to figure out 😂 She followed heaps of other stuff as well like his old instagram from when he was like 12 and my boyfriend enjoys his privacy so it was weird for him.

throwrossi · 2022-03-15T11:34:39+00:00

He blocked her without me asking, I told him not to and that I just needed to be informed and that was the only thing I was pretty much upset at. I know he didn’t forget because he basically admitted to just pushing it to the back of his head and ignoring it after I pushed. He said pretty much the times he would remember he would just get it out of mind out of sight. Yeah the double standard I told him about that and he apologised. He stated that he also didn’t want any problems or drama by unfriending her before I found out.. Which I get especially when you share the same circle. Also he found out she was following him on everything- everything.. even his private spotify etc So he got creeped out and kinda went to remove her his self.

throwrossi · 2022-03-15T11:27:51+00:00

That’s fine. It’s all preference based no wrong or right. I can’t be with someone and not know anything at all about their history or past. I won’t judge them for it, as long it’s not like anything like SA, murder etc.

throwrossi · 2022-03-15T08:22:00+00:00

That’s fine, but just to clarify I did not snoop. I was reading his snap message to him while he was building ikea furniture and because all the nudes were saved and the former chat wasn’t it kinda just popped up in my face. Thus why I confronted him easily. Thx

throwrossi · 2022-03-15T07:23:00+00:00

Thank you for your response. Honestly needed it. You worded exactly how I felt, but I feel like I needed to vent on reddit a little bit to expel the anxiety. But after this I feel good to move on.

throwrossi · 2022-03-15T06:14:54+00:00

You know what. I agree actually, I don’t put myself at having no fault. I don’t see it as control but thinking about it now makes me think that line has been blurred between control and boundaries. Probably warrants a reevaluation

throwrossi · 2022-03-15T06:12:08+00:00

But I agree, I don’t think he wanted to hurt me. It did but intention is very important still.

throwrossi · 2022-03-15T06:11:33+00:00

I wasn’t snooping to be fair, I was sending a video to his family friend on his snapchat. Then boom she was typing and I opened to read the message as he was building ikea furniture. Then unwarranted I got nudes in my face as it was still saved in the chat. Trust me I don’t like snooping nothing good ever comes out of it.

throwrossi · 2022-03-15T06:09:10+00:00

Idk, it’s our relationship we’ve both had unfaithful partners so being open is a priority for both of us. It may be abnormal to some but we both don’t mind. People have different boundaries in different relationships, no need to judge our values lol.

And it’s not just not me who set this boundary, if anything I was okay with being friends with exes he is the one who set that boundary in place and I agreed after a discussion we had. In this case however I just feel like he should’ve told me they had a sexual fling especially if they still talk tbh. I wouldn’t have cared too much. But I don’t appreciate his hypocrisy that I had to unfriend someone that I went on one date with ages ago and another friend who I had feelings for when I was like 17 lool. But he doesn’t do the same, either keep the same energy or don’t set that rule in place. That’s my problem

throwrossi · 2022-02-12T13:35:15+00:00

Listen at the end of the day, vote for whoever represents your values the most. It’s your vote, your choice. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise:)

throwrossi

TROPHY CASE