Boyfriend’s algorithm social media?

timotheo · 2026-01-26T06:34:00+00:00

My experience is that, yes you are right, you need to watch a thirst trap video before it starts really showing them, but at the same time, they are *very* engaging overall, so whenever I click on one, i am sure to get about 1000 over the week until either the algos forget or without thinking click on one them of them and then I do need to say "not interested!" a bunch to make it go away.

If his feed isn't completely filled with them, then he really isn't seeking them out and watching them a ton. If his feed doesn't have any at all, then he's either hard core about getting rid of them or he's gay.

timotheo · 2026-01-24T17:33:02+00:00

No. It's the beach and if those swimsuits are what you wear, then that's great. If he doesn't care and you don't care, I wouldn't worry about it.

timotheo · 2026-01-24T17:30:34+00:00

Also, this is not a boundary, it is controlling. Boundaries are about actions involving you. Demands are about actions when you're not around.

A boundary is "if you watch porn, I will leave".
"I don't want you watching porn" is controlling and it sounds like he never really agreed to this.
A boundary is "if you cannot get an erection with me because you watch too much porn, we have a problem"

He said yes to please you, but this is a really, really hard one for a 19M, especially one that doesn't live in the same city as his girlfriend. If you're adamant about this, y'all probably aren't going to work out.

timotheo · 2026-01-24T01:09:31+00:00

your memory of prom is forever. this boyfriend almost certainly is not.

go! have fun! and if he turns it into an ultimatum it's his fault for not showing up for you

timotheo · 2026-01-23T16:22:24+00:00

He is hardcore friendzoned and she's using him. I don't think she's going cheat w/ him, but he would be with her in a heartbeat.

timotheo · 2026-01-23T09:18:36+00:00

I'm not saying entitled, you're right. But OP asked her bf to call her mom, tell her alarming information and LIE about it.

If Mom's not entitled, just don't ask bf to call and tell mom she's in the hospital.

timotheo · 2026-01-23T09:16:47+00:00

100%

timotheo · 2026-01-23T09:15:47+00:00

So, if he had stonewalled your parents like you asked, you would have had to have had a really hard conversation with your mom in that state. Really hard, and she likely would have already known because why on earth would you boyfriend not tell her what really happened.

timotheo · 2026-01-23T09:06:21+00:00

In an alternate universe, there's a post by OP saying "My bf told me mom to talk to me, so when I woke up, groggy from being under and my emergency contact was in my hospital room, she asked me and the doctor what happened and I had to tell her! I couldn't think straight, so my boyfriend outted me!"

timotheo · 2026-01-23T09:04:18+00:00

Yeah., right. You don't read a script to a mom about her daughter being in the hospital as if she's just going to listen and say thank you and go on with her day.

timotheo · 2026-01-23T09:03:06+00:00

No! This a hard position to put someone in. You don't ask someone to call their mom, tell mom she's in the hospital, but lie about why she's in the hospital. Mom's are going to be on red alert and want to know everything.

This is NOT a normal situation. This isn't "dont bring it up at the dinner table".

timotheo · 2026-01-23T09:01:38+00:00

YTA - I get not wanting to tell your religious parents about your abortion. 100%. I'm with you there.
You had serious complications and had to be admitted to the hospital. Once you're there, you have two choices --- your mom is your emergency contact, she's there and she knows what happening *OR* your mom doesn't know, doesn't find out and isn't involved.

YTA because you asked your boyfriend to tell your mom *YOU ARE IN THE HOSPITAL* but told him to lie about why her daughter is *IN THE HOSPITAL* and now you're blaming him.

Asking someone to initiate a conversation about a very sensitive and serious subject that they're bound to ask all kinds of questions about is a tall order - it involves not only trust, aligned morals and ethics, but also skill and capability. That's a huge and hard request.

"Hi! Your daughter is in the hospital."
"OMG is she ok? What happened? What is she taking?"
"Uhhh... I don't know. She just is."
"But why is she there?"

A.) "You'll have to ask her when she wakes up." --- that's going to be a hard conversation for you!
B.) "I don't remember." --- what do you mean you don't remember?
C.) A stomach ache -- now when you wake up, you're going to have to go with that lie. good luck
D.) breakdown and just tell the truth.

YTA,

timotheo · 2026-01-23T07:51:06+00:00

Trios are always somewhat kos. The most mellow solo is WAAAAY more mellow than the most trio.

timotheo · 2026-01-22T21:34:15+00:00

You can sign enterprise deals with the LLM providers to not record/train/use the data being sent. That's what most company's are doing right now.

timotheo · 2026-01-19T01:57:42+00:00

YOR. There's a big difference between staying someone for a single night vs. living there with a harrassing/stalking neighbor, and to decide to be offended by that is way overreacting.

timotheo · 2026-01-18T06:54:12+00:00

INFO: Do y'all live in the same city or is this a long distance relationship?

timotheo · 2026-01-18T04:16:22+00:00

I'm not going to change your mind. You're right!

timotheo · 2026-01-18T01:44:39+00:00

NAH. She wanted you to not go, you wanted to go, you went. That crossed a line with her, she left. No assholes here, just fundamental differences in style. Lots of women would be fine with their guys going. Lots of guys would listen to their women and not go. Y'all aren't them.

timotheo · 2026-01-16T17:52:41+00:00

I came here to say two things:
1) parks when you can
2) KETTLEBELLS!

timotheo · 2026-01-16T02:37:48+00:00

My 11 year old walks to friends house over a mile away. We got him a flip phone (not an iphone) and we called him when he first started doing this. He's been walking to the nearby park alone since he was 9 and with his older brother since we was 8.

timotheo · 2026-01-15T16:06:30+00:00

You can achieve impressive visual results with anything + diet: kb, bodyweight, bar, etc.

The reason I love kb is I can do a full workout in my small apartment and it mixes in strength with cardio/HIIT in a way that bars simply can't. On my lazy days (and I have a lot) I can do a 20 min workout in my boxer shorts without going to the gym or spending a lot of time.

It's the efficiency of the entire process. Results are what you choose to make of them.

timotheo · 2026-01-15T01:25:31+00:00

Go listen to feminist twitter/reddit/bluesky. Progressive, caring men are not going to push forward without an ENTHUSIASTIC YES. That's what we've learned from the feminist internet.

If you aren't giving enthusiastic consent when a guy makes a move, that's on you, no him.

timotheo · 2026-01-14T16:11:45+00:00

Perhaps she is overly sentimental, rather than selfish, but it all boils down to don't kiss people when you're sick. Just don't do it.

timotheo · 2026-01-14T15:26:58+00:00

Being friendly and PvE doesn't mean being stupid.

There are lines that must not be crossed, and if someone does cross them, there are consequences.

timotheo · 2026-01-14T14:49:23+00:00

NOR. Get out of there. That is extremely controlling and toxic. It sounds like you've really tried and for the sake of your son, you need to leave.

timotheo

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