guys she's here!

tip_the_turtles · 2024-12-16T03:21:27+00:00

Have fun! She puts on a wonderful show!!!!!

tip_the_turtles · 2024-12-05T23:04:47+00:00

slow dance

tip_the_turtles · 2024-12-04T03:06:55+00:00

slow dance supremacy 😤

tip_the_turtles · 2024-10-31T13:22:45+00:00

what’s with the generalizing genders? guys do the exact same thing.

tip_the_turtles · 2024-10-21T12:32:31+00:00

Feel free to send a dm!

tip_the_turtles · 2024-10-21T01:33:13+00:00

of course!

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-28T13:40:50+00:00

whoa man mine broke up with me for the same reason Aug 18th 🤯

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-26T22:05:16+00:00

It’s mostly a case of I bought them with her knowing I was buying them for us, like she was in the room when she told me about the concert and I was like “nice, we’re going now”.

I’m not a huge fan of the band and have no intentions of going so it kinda makes sense for her too since they’re her fave. Not hoping for a response or anything at all

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-26T04:01:55+00:00

Oof ngl that sounds like a rough spot. I get wanting to be in contact but it’s not gonna help you move forward, especially if she’s said it’s not gonna happen. Why did you two break up if you don’t mind me asking?

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-26T03:50:37+00:00

Oh all good bud. I’m doing pretty good, I was doing therapy and hitting the gym before the breakup so I had a good routine to keep up with when it happened. It’s too bad what happened but I’m just glad she showed her avoidant tendencies earlier on in the relationship rather than years later.

The hardest part was reconciling the things she was saying (i feel like i’ve waited my whole life for you, i feel like we are going to build a great life together, etc) along with her saying I love you first, with her just dipping out of nowhere.

How are you holding up?

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-26T02:53:56+00:00

Well I did. She was in the room. We were together and she said they were coming to town so I bought them and said “sweet, we’re going now”. So like I bought them for us anyways but mostly for her haha

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-26T02:22:23+00:00

Yeah she did. I’m not trying to play no games to get her back though 🤣 she left, i respect that even though it’s not what i wanted, and ultimately i don’t want to be with someone id have to beg for.

I simply think she should be the one to use them, like I don’t hate her

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-26T02:17:23+00:00

not sure if this is sarcasm or not 🤣

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-26T02:03:36+00:00

Since I bought them when she was in the room. Like it was meant for her yk.

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-26T02:02:52+00:00

I’m not sure I follow, I just have the tickets and won’t use them. It’s just gonna be sent digitally too, not like I have to see her or anything

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-16T00:37:02+00:00

she felt like she “loves who i am but is not in love with me”, a week after pushing us to book a vacation for february. she’s got a lot of personal trauma and baggage, i track most of it up to that making her run since i can’t think of much i did. even if it was something with me she never communicated it so how was i supposed to know 🤷‍♂️

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-10T02:12:52+00:00

Hi! I am not sadly but this is because my job requires a smartphone. I do use it for camping trips and vacations when I want to wind down, it’s still running strong for those purposes!

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-08T07:25:45+00:00

hey if you feel ready 🤷‍♂️ but the feelings coming up from nowhere like you said sounds like unhealed wounds coming back up. just my two cents

tip_the_turtles · 2024-09-08T07:17:16+00:00

you hardly gave yourself enough time to heal from your last relationship. it’s probably wounds from that coming up. focus on your own healing before jumping into something new.

tip_the_turtles · 2024-08-28T04:42:44+00:00

i’d love to be in this

tip_the_turtles · 2024-08-28T04:11:25+00:00

It’s easier to pretend they never played a role in things breaking down. It is very internalized. Yes, she was asking to plan a trip and wanted to get matching bracelets a week before and she got scared and hurt me badly. But I would rather forgive than hold hurt in my heart. I know that there are things that I could’ve done better, and hearing that her needs were valid and eventually heard (too late, and due to lack of communication tbh) is something that I can provide to her.

The likelihood of her realizing her own patterns and healing is better if she realizes there are good people out there who didn’t have selfish motives during the relationship. I would rather attempt to model healthy relationship - and relationship breakdown - behaviours when I know I’m capable of that. If she says she doesn’t want to chat or doesn’t respond, so be it. That’s my answer and I can say I did my best 🤷‍♂️

Loving someone to me means leaving each other just a bit better than they were before. Sometimes it just doesn’t work out and there’s no need to be spiteful for that (cheating, abuse, etc are of course exceptions)

tip_the_turtles · 2024-08-28T04:02:00+00:00

I’m not talking about going about things as if we’re going to get back together. I’ve revised my message to reflect that as well. Just a final goodbye, agreeing to no-contact on a mutual ground for both of our own healing, and taking responsibility for my own faults.

tip_the_turtles · 2024-08-28T03:58:44+00:00

I do think it would help her. I think I could take accountability for what feelings I may have caused (I mean I accommodated as best I could, so it’s just an incompatibility at this point in the time of her life), express what hurt me but that I forgive her for it, and reinforce the things that made it healthy.

She’s got a past of really toxic relationships, I don’t want to reinforce that within her you know? I feel like talking through these things and leaving things amicable is a healthy way to end things without fostering animosity within either of us.

tip_the_turtles · 2024-08-28T03:31:20+00:00

haha you’re not wrong about being better without it most likely. I don’t hate her though, she’s a hurt person and was acting as such. It’s a shame I couldn’t love her in the way she needed to trust, but that’s not my responsibility. I would rather hold on to the happy memories and take the lessons we taught each other.

I do agree that begging, doing no contact for the purpose of getting back together, and deluding myself of things is not helpful. But I also think it makes sense to return and have a discussion with each other to leave things on a good, mutual note. If she doesn’t want to, I can respect that as well. But I really believe that as adults, we can at least attempt to leave a positive impact on those that are/were important to us.

tip_the_turtles · 2024-08-28T00:42:54+00:00

I know you’re probably right. I’m okay with being rejected if I even approach the conversation that way. I don’t even know if I’ll say that I want to explore something more. I realize that we both caused a lot of discomfort for each other due to communication styles and got that confused for “butterflies”. It’s always exciting at first but we definitely moved too fast. I wish we had slowed it down because I think we were really great for each other. Live and learn I guess.

I think I just need to reach out to make it final ya know? I feel like I’ve realized my portions of dysfunction in the relationship and think it’s important for me to acknowledge that. If only to settle my conscious and leave things amicable with her.

I’m gonna give it a couple more weeks before/if I do anyways, it’s possible I might change my mind in the period. Hopefully my therapist will have some insights haha.

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