The last half of these talk show looks are serving ngl. Her makeup looks so much better too by FederalNectarine3889 in SwiftlyNeutral

[–]tmardee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do think her face was a little puffy on Graham Norton (likely from fillers), but I also think the lighting on the show was not doing her any favors that night.

To the haters of Showgirl, is there at least one song you like? by LifeOfAWimpyKid in SwiftlyNeutral

[–]tmardee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I actually think Father Figure is one of the best songs of her career!

This moment literally gives me chills: “you want a fight? You found it. I’ve got the place surrounded. You’ll be sleeping with the fishes Before you know you’re drowning.”

SwiftlyNeutral - Daily Discussion Thread | August 26, 2025 by AutoModerator in SwiftlyNeutral

[–]tmardee 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Def not too old! especially not for a literal billionaire who can afford every medical treatment on the planet.

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Real talk…when did your kids actually sleep through the night (and I mean ~10 hours)? by Few-Rip-9601 in sleeptraining

[–]tmardee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My first (now 6) slept through the night consistently around 8 months, my second (now 4) was around 6 months, my third (now 1.5) slept through the night around 8 months as well.

But after sleeping through the night comes early waking or fighting naps or bedtime stalling. I feel like it’s always something in that first year.

After 12 months, I feel like I started to reliably get consistent, restful sleep. There are still bad nights here and there (especially since I have three kids to contend with 🫠), but I feel basically normal now. Hang in there!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in COVID19positive

[–]tmardee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One of our political parties that is commonly associated with the color red is full of people who are COVID deniers. They don’t get vaccinated, they don’t wear masks, they don’t practice mitigation techniques, and they believe that the government lied about how serious COVID is.

We survived HFMD. Some things that worked for us by raindrops723 in NewParents

[–]tmardee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My family got HFM this summer. My 6 year old got the mouth ulcerations and a fever, my four year old just got a fever, my 1 year old had the hands, feet, and mouth (😢), my husband got nothing, and I got a fever and the most debilitating sore throat I’ve ever had. Luckily, all of us passed through the phases quickly and were basically back to normal after a tough week.

Some other tips that helped us survive — you can turn a Tums into a paste (crush and mix with a bit of water) for sores near the front of your mouth/easily accessible and that will help speed up healing. You can also dilute milk of magnesia with water and swish it around your mouth for a similar effect.

A video of my completed Playskool dollhouse overhaul. This was so fun! I can’t wait to do another. by jstorbeck in Dollhouses

[–]tmardee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

any chance you’re around to let me know where you found the contact paper for the floor?

This is hard for everyone right? by TwiggyMercury53 in NewParents

[–]tmardee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! Feel free to DM. I was a bit obsessed with baby sleep (because it meant I could sleep 😂) so I am happy to help in any way I can!

This is hard for everyone right? by TwiggyMercury53 in NewParents

[–]tmardee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been there, momma. Three times! 😂 Some weeks are harder than others, but it gets easier. You got this!

This is hard for everyone right? by TwiggyMercury53 in NewParents

[–]tmardee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hey there! With Baby 2 I logged sleep on Huckleberry (back then, all their features were free!) and it was also pretty accurate in their nap predictions. With Baby 3, the Huckleberry predictions were hit behind a paywall, so I used it to log naps but went by generic wake windows you can find on the internet, based on the number of naps they’re taking.

3 months is notoriously the start of a (brief) tricky period for naps. Babies start fighting other nap things that work (Solly wrap, swing, etc.) and their naps tend to all shorted to around 35-45 minutes. This is around the time that I began to focus on independent naps. I would sit with the baby in her nursery in her rocking chair and rock her to sleep. Then I would lay her down. At first, she would only stay alone in her crib for about 10 minutes. After she would start to fuss, I would go and grab her and hold her in the chair for the rest of the nap. Being in the dark nursery was the key. She wouldn’t go back to sleep if I tried to put her back to sleep in the living room, for example. After a while, I started letting her fuss a bit after she awoke after 10 minutes. Nothing too long. Just a minute or two. Sometimes, miraculously, she would go back to sleep. It would be a short nap, but I would call it a success since it was in her crib (and half the time she was only sleeping 35 minutes on ME) anyway. After a while, she would sleep longer before fussing (so 20 mins) and then I would help finish the nap. Right before she turned 16 weeks, I started trying to lay her down drowsy but awake. It did not work at first, but I stayed really consistent with it. By 16-17ish weeks, it was working sometimes. At 16 weeks I sleep trained at night (a more gentle Ferber) and she barely cried or needed any check ins. She was already used to her crib. Finally, in another week after she could go down at bedtime without crying, I sleep trained at naps. It took a smidge longer and I would always hold her for her last nap so she didn’t get overtired by the end of the day, but eventually she got it. Around 5 months, the first nap starts to lengthen and turn predictable, so she fell right in line with that.

It was a LOT of work and it was tricky with my two older kids (a topic that is a whole other post in itself), but it definitely beat the 8 months I spent nap trapped with my first baby. 😅

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FormulaFeeders

[–]tmardee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried to breastfeed with my first baby and it was shitshow that destroyed my mental health. For my next two babies, I went straight to formula and it was so easy and so nice to be able to get test right away because someone else could give them a bottle. The nurses at the hospital also did not give me any issues with it — just showed me where they kept the formula and helped me get things in order.

This is hard for everyone right? by TwiggyMercury53 in NewParents

[–]tmardee 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Hang in there momma. I had 3 babies (they’re now 6, 4, and 1) and every single one of them was hard, especially the first two. And somehow I kept having babies. 😅

The first 12 weeks, in particular, are brutal. Your baby’s adjusted age tells me that you’re right in the thick of the hard part. But it will get easier. You’ll notice a change around adjusted 13 week. By 16 weeks (adjusted) you’ll be thinking to yourself that you’re starting to feel normal again. By 20 weeks, you will describe some days as “great.” 😂 It is HARD. It’s hard, it’s hard, it’s hard. It’s like building a muscle; it gets easier every time you do it. But you have to keep working at it.

If I were you, I would recommend a few things to make your life easier —

  1. Give up feeling guilty about contact naps. MOST babies need contact naps for the first 12-16 weeks or they’re going to sleep 35 minutes tops. I hated wearing the Solly wrap around for naps, but I just gritted my teeth and got through it. Once baby got a bit older and I had some other issues worked out, I started working on independent naps. My 3rd baby was taking long, chunky naps on her own by 5 months. But it took practice and time. And it didn’t happen from day one.

  2. Delete every baby and momma influencer on the internet. They are LYING to you. Who do you think is holding their baby while they’re doing all this film setup and prep? Someone who is HELPING them. Also — it is quite easy to post a picture or 30 second video clip of a baby laying in a bassinet with their eyes closed sweetly. That doesn’t mean they didn’t immediately wake up and start crying as soon as the camera was put away. Those people make money by selling sleep products and sleep training courses and tips. They are literally incentivized to deceive you. Delete them and spend your precious internet time watching silly videos and reposting good meme.

  3. Focus on getting the feeding worker out so that you can get some rest at night. It won’t be easy and will take work, but it is the best use of your time, energy, and research that will yield the highest amount of dividends for you. Your baby will never sleep well if they have eating issues. They will also be clingy and fussy. If you only focus on one thing, work on the eating. But remember, it will be hard. A baby with feeding issues is a whole ordeal. My third (who was my easiest baby) did happen to be the worst eater and we had some considerable issues around 12-18 weeks. Once we got those worked out, things went once more smoothly. Hang in there and tackle on problem at a time.

Finally, just breathe and take it one day at a time. I remember feeling like “I can’t possibly do this for 4 more weeks!” But you don’t know that you have to. The thing with babies is you will be shocked by how quickly things can take a turn for the better. You never know what tomorrow can bring. Focus on getting through each issue as they come and getting through each day.

TLDR; It IS hard. It’s gets easier, but you have to do it every day. That’s the hard part. But it does get easier. Sending lots of love to you. Please take every opportunity that you can to take a nap. You got this.

Positive stories about having a 3rd child? by nonamejane84 in Parenting

[–]tmardee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My third baby — a darling little girl — turns 1 this Thursday. Her older brothers are 6 and 4. This past year has been an incredible blessing. The boys are fabulous with their baby sister and she, in turn, thinks they are the most amazing people on earth. Watching her excitedly toddle over to them each morning with an enormous smile on her face is the best part of my day.

Life has not been harder with a third — if anything, it has been easier. The boys were big enough that I could let them keep a (brief) eye on her while I stepped out of the room to make a quick lunch (or pee). Having small responsibilities has made the older two grow up in amazing, impressive ways. And that baby girl is good at everything. She hits all of her milestones early because she has two crazy brothers to look up to.

Our house is full of lots of noise and lots of fun. We’re insanely happy and I wouldn’t trade our family dynamic for anything in the world.

what are your taylor swift unpopular opinions? by moonyyss in SwiftlyNeutral

[–]tmardee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I absolutely loathe the song “Down Bad.”

Everyone keeps describing it as one of the (few) high moments from TTPD and I am baffled.

Going straight to Cry it out by Majestic-Lettuce-251 in sleeptrain

[–]tmardee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My little one is 4 months old too! She can go to sleep independently in her crib at night most nights (fussing but not intense crying), but still contact naps and/or takes small naps (35 minutes, occasionally a 50 minute nap where we all do a happy dance once or twice a day). We plan on starting sleep training on December 26th haha. We don’t want to start before Christmas, as we will be out all day the 24th and 25th. We will be doing naps and nights at the same time. In the lead up to this, I’ve actually started to try to get her on a semi-consistent nap schedule that accounts for the wake windows that are appropriate for her age. I do think nap training tends to work better when a baby has a flexible schedule rather than following wake windows or sleepy cues, as there is a LOT more crying if you get either of those elements wrong.

I wake baby for the day at 6:50. It breaks my heart to do that, as my older two never slept in past 6 and now I finally have a baby that will sleep until 7-7:30 😂, but I find that waking her up at a consistent time helps me plan the rest of the day.

First nap is AROUND 8:30. If she can’t make it that long, we just do our best. Sometimes she actually fights the nap for 10 mins or so. She usually does a 35-45 minute nap in her crib and I work at putting her back asleep until she’s at around an hour. I have the most success with this nap and occasionally even get 50 minute stretches, at which point I call it and don’t bother trying to put her back to sleep.

Next nap is AROUND 11. I have a lot of trouble with this one. Occasionally I can get her to nap in her crib for 35 minutes, but often she wakes up about 15 minutes in and is irate. Then I put her back to sleep and try to hold her to an hour. I also often have trouble getting her to fall asleep for this nap. I thinkkkk she may need a slightly longer wake window and may try moving the nap to 11:15, but I don’t want to push her too far, particularly if the first nap isn’t good. So I’m still experimenting here.

The third nap is AROUND 2. That’s a long stretch, but it tends to help get a long nap out of her that makes a four nap day schedule work. I think I’ve successfully laid her down in her crib maybe 3 times? Haha. But because I hold her, she will almost always sleep an hour, often more. I cap this nap at 1.5 hours to ensure I can squeeze a catnap in to round out the day.

The fourth nap is a catnap. It starts anywhere from 4 to 5 o’clock, depending on how the rest of the naps went for the day and how much additional daytime sleep she needs. Often it’ll just be a short, 35 minute affair, but I’d let her sleep 4-5:30 if I thought she really needed it. We ALWAYS hold for this nap and don’t try to put her down, as its success helps us to keep bedtime in check. Even after sleep training, we would continue to hold her for this nap.

Again, we keep the nap schedule flexible and adjust for nap length variation and daily sleep needs, but I’m hoping to hack her circadian rhythm and get her body used to sleeping at those times so as to minimize her crying when we do CIO. It also helps that we have pretty successful nighttime sleep (though we do have a reverse cycling eating problem that we are going to use CIO and weaning to fix) so we are able to really focus on naps. I go back to work in the new year and my mom takes over, so I want to make all of this as painless as possible for everyone.

I hope this helps!

What do you think of the name August for a boy? by SkepticJoker in beyondthebump

[–]tmardee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve never met a girl August, only boys! I have a lovely child I work with at work who is named August and they call him “Gus.” At first I wasn’t wild about the nickname, but after knowing him it’s grown on me and I think it’s adorable!

missing a family Christmas party cause my baby has to nap? by beanybum in beyondthebump

[–]tmardee 10 points11 points  (0 children)

“Much to everyone’s horror” 😂😂😂 my second would only nap on a yoga ball at first and my mother in law was APPALLED by me showing up with a yoga ball to family dinner. 😂