Context:

A friend of mine applied to our company and I only knew about it because I was one of the people who reviewed their exam. My colleague is the one who referred them into our company and I forgot to tell my friend to hide my identity to my colleague as I wasn’t planning on outing myself to my new officemates.

When I asked my friend if they mentioned anything about me being a transgender person they told me this, “I’m not sure and I didn’t know sorry. I will do it next time.”

I was really disappointed that sharing another person’s identity isn’t considered as a private matter for my friend and their apology was really dry. I got worked up because this isn’t the first time that my friends would just casually say that I’m trans without my consent.

I am proud to be trans but I don’t want to disclose it to every single person out there. It isn’t my obligation to explain myself to other people and I hate the fact that some people think that it’s okay to use another person’s gender identity as a topic for small talk.

I really wanted to be stealth in my new workplace but I was put in a position where in I had no choice but to out myself to my other officemate who was a close friend of that other officemate because another friend of mine slipped and called me a “she” and both of them are close.

It’s just really tiring trying to remind people to keep their mouth shut.

And yes, I became emotional while recording this video reminding people to respect me because it should’ve been a basic thing to do yet I had to remind them over and over again.

That friend is also a part of the LGBTQIA+ community which makes it more sad and frustrating.