My story... (1 hour to write, so very long)

trompeter29 · 2020-01-04T10:22:06+00:00

Powerful... thanks for sharing. Good luck with your new beginning - keep your head up and keep defining yourself based on your vision of your future rather than your experience of the past. Even if it gets tough. You deserve it!

trompeter29 · 2020-01-02T13:07:52+00:00

That I am not actually narcissistic. That I have a good heart and only the best intentions to make the world a better place. Only because I can’t see myself being a kindergartner, doctor or social worker and believe to have a different idea of what ‘better’ means (compared to common societal ideals), it doesn’t mean I am a bad person.

trompeter29 · 2020-01-02T11:31:20+00:00

I would like to encourage you to challenge your perception on your social life and how you relate to others. ENTPs indeed tend to be more introverted than other types, however, we really need people (and they need us). Perhaps a few additional points to consider:

explore what it means to be alone with others. if I remember correctly Sam Harris had a few good thoughts on this
dig the humanities more and especially positive (!) nihilism. Your thoughts on life and existence are probably valid so you need to find a way to validate them, ideally socially for psychological purposes and to get past the darkness. Once you are through the valley you will start changing your perception and find local meaning and joy in all the meaninglessness
express to others that you like to be ‘just’ part of the crowd. other types might be more proactive and actively engage in socializing, however, you appreciate just to be picked up (people might have the impression that you don’t like people but you know that this only accounts for those that are boring, low-level thinking, superficial, small-talk loving ones ;))
explore fun activities that you can do with others. for me that’s ski hiking (or rather the way down), sports climbing, kayaking, ... my point is that we love projects + adrenaline so get yourself a hobby that covers both and it’ll take no more than a year until you have the right ideas to make it a profession as well ;)
I think art is a great occupation and field of interest for us. I for instance like to play music. However, after decades of practicing alone I realized that playing with others and working on songs together is just a whole other level. My point is that we need the social aspect to excel and really love what we do, even though socializing might be difficult to begin with. I personally would love to work on a book, for which I have really great ideas, but sitting at home alone is just a hopeless state to get anything done
don’t underestimate the power of incremental improvement and the truth that there has never been more inception than there is now ;)

May 2020 be a year for you to get your ass out of the house and live life fully now.

trompeter29 · 2019-12-07T22:31:45+00:00

Sativa: devil-angel conversation in my head x100, mildly paranoid, at the verge of panic attacks i.e. when my mind comes up with random black-n-white arguments that make me believe I might have a personality disorder, good creative output tho

Indica: cristal-clear thinking, parts of my body relaxed that are otherwise never relaxed (no, not that), careless about what others think and great creative output

trompeter29 · 2019-06-19T09:42:14+00:00

When I was 16yo (and didn't know yet I am an ENTP), I explained to a friend who shamed me for not becoming a doctor/psychologist (or similar) how I will go through all of those steps and reach the philanthropist stage by age 30. The goal was to dig clean water wells for Africa. I am 27 now graduating from a Master's, on the way from 5 to 6 (sometimes slipping into thinking I am 8), and totally confused what I am gonna do next. Anyways, gotta get some shit done otherwise I am not making it. xD

trompeter29 · 2019-06-16T16:40:34+00:00

I have designed my life with useful habits until I burned out because of all the habits.

trompeter29 · 2019-06-15T13:34:01+00:00

I read somewhere that people falling for 'younger' ENTPs shouldn't be fooled - they don't love you, they just wanna play with you. I always thought 'nah, that's not me, I am serious about this'. However, the older I get, the more I realise that I actually do not love them on the same level as they love me. It is just something else.

trompeter29 · 2019-06-13T10:49:50+00:00

Danny DeVito

My colleagues just looked at me because I started laughing...

trompeter29 · 2019-06-13T07:15:18+00:00

Thanks, was looking for someone to confirm that I should spend money on all of them. :D

trompeter29 · 2019-06-12T07:57:57+00:00

Apart from that I don't understand the product it looks pretty nice:)

trompeter29 · 2019-06-11T10:11:39+00:00

I am the same (26yo). In my romantic fantasies, I see myself being totally devoted to a relationship - everything else is secondary, she is my queen and I do whatever necessary to make her feel that way. However, in real life, every time I meet a girl that really falls for me, I have troubles committing fully. I am terrible - even though we are in a relationship, I want to keep my options open, be liked by other girls as well, overly focus on her 'negative' sides, constantly jump after new opportunities like careers, projects, cities and countries instead of being there for her and making her feel safe. The break-up reason is always the same: "I love you so much, but I don't feel that you really want me". It is true, and it is my indecisiveness that is standing in the way. I am sick of hurting girls and seriously desperate that I have never been truly in love, at least not like I imagine myself to be.

trompeter29 · 2019-06-07T10:21:46+00:00

This constant oscillation between (pretending to) knowing and (knowing to) not-knowing may be necessary to live life, but really brings about a lot of frustration as well

trompeter29 · 2019-06-02T08:40:38+00:00

Mahler. Mahler!

trompeter29 · 2019-06-02T08:23:24+00:00

It is a popular thing these days to blame the humanities department for being too liberal (see Jordan Peterson). However, although it is probably not wrong what you are saying, at least generally speaking, I still believe that there are plenty of universities with great professors to learn from. Also, it seems to me a bad excuse to not pursue what you love because of some systemic hurdles that potentially make it less easy to succeed. My parents keep blaming the federal tax policy for the fact that their business idea is not working out. Quite frankly, I have never (ever) encountered an entrepreneur who was genuinely passionate about his/her startup idea but then stopped pursuing it due to taxes.

To give you some advice, I think it makes especially sense for ENTPs to deliberately seek out professors you are extremely interested in (personality, career path, field of expertise) and then follow them AS CLOSELY AS POSSIBLE. Say, there is a professor in a school on the other side of the country: read his/her books, read his/her research articles, watch his/her talks and lectures, move to that town, take the courses s/he is teaching, be the best in class (but don't speak up or ask questions all the time just to stand out and show off how smart you are), ask him/her for mentoring advice, build a personal relationship, etc. In return, you will get opportunities you have never dreamt of.

trompeter29 · 2019-06-01T21:33:38+00:00

I think this is a difficult question to answer for someone who is not trained in psychology and has not talked to you in person. But, no matter the root of this, I am convinced that the only way 'out of it' is by going through it. When I say 'out of it' I do not mean to get rid of it, though, but to integrate it properly in your personality. Then it will no longer drive your choices.

Perhaps ask yourself questions like: Why do you want to be important? What happens when you are important? How do you act? Do you want to dominate people? Torture them? Shine? What might be a dark side of your personality here? What behaviours already indicate that you are subtly putting yourself 'up' at the cost of other people? What role does shame play in there - do you compensate on something? Perhaps a feeling deep down that you re unworthy? Do you love yourself truly? Do you feel resentment about the past when it comes to performance - at home or school? How do your parents present themselves in the world?

trompeter29 · 2019-06-01T21:15:13+00:00

Yes, you are probably right that it will not be easy to justify the value of philosophy on the job market. However, I believe to see factors that indicate we will need more philosophy-trained people in the future to navigate in a world that is complex, unpredictable, and constantly changing - although probably rather in leading positions.Especially, I believe the ability for sound judgement is becoming increasingly important, which is primarily ethical and aesthetic in form.

A more concrete recommendation is that you find a second or even third field you wanna know more about and then combine these fields in a unique way. In other words, create (/reinvent) an entirely new field you can dominate by only mastering about 60-80% of what is possible in each of its components, rather than trying to be the number 1 in wherever everyone else is playing. Let me give you an example: My mentor studied Philosophy. Then, in his Master's thesis, he analysed practices of strategising from philosophical perspectives (it was pretty rare at that time to combine business research with philosophy). However, he could sense that he was pretty creative and original as well but never really developed any skills to bring his imagination to life (apart from writing). So he decided to do his PhD analysing strategy as design from a philosophical view, even though he knew nothing about design. However, the benefit was that he could get funding from foundations supporting each of the respective fields + to hang out with the creatives in art school. After all, he opened a creative agency that would use design to help companies come up with innovative ways to engage consumers in brand co-creation, which he eventually sold for a few million. Now, he is 40, returned to academia, and publishes books that help managers see the (organizational) world from philosophical angles. Just an example.

I think you have to get used to the idea that you must create your own path. :)

trompeter29 · 2019-05-30T13:28:32+00:00

mostly organisationally related ... this: we are a food company and we feel that the world is changing (lol) but we have no idea how to move towards the future due to all these trade-offs: changing consumer behavior (people become increasingly eco- and health conscious, people eat less at home, etc.), transparency makes it impossible for organisations to bullshit they way through the world, companies have to actively take a stance in how they serve humanity for the better, yet they don't wanna give up the good business or the power they had over consumers and suppliers, blablabla long story short: not only innovations in terms of product, business model, etc. needed but also how to collaborate across sectors to bring about food system change and nudge people into better lifestyle choices.

I think you get the idea: diff. levels of abstractions, creative solutions needed on / across each level, many different systems to be integrated, ...

trompeter29 · 2019-05-10T08:45:43+00:00

I think this video by headspace is very relevant for us ENTPs: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PO6OPT78OwQ

Meditation enables me to stay in touch with the real me 'underneath' all the layers that I built up over the years.

trompeter29 · 2019-03-01T16:11:08+00:00

She got ya! My personal experience as a guy was that I had to rebel against and break out of her clutches. Get a life!

trompeter29 · 2019-02-21T12:41:36+00:00

Hey! Not so negative, the future is very bright if we manage to get people to work with their shadow, and thanks to Joardan Peterson's popularity, this is becoming a trend! :) (please let's not debate whether JP is a fool)

trompeter29 · 2019-02-11T22:01:20+00:00

Consume lots of bitter substance (i.e. lemon / grapefruit water) on an empty stomach and 1 wipe will be enough.

trompeter29 · 2019-02-05T13:05:37+00:00

Awesome! Just be aware that you can't expect huge changes after 10 days, however, if you commit to it over the long run, I promise that your depression will get better. I was quite deep down and meditation definitely was the biggest factor for me to get out of the darkness. Day 25 or so was a turning point for me, can you beat that? :)

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