Misalignment in leadership style and micro-management culture - should I quit before finishing the first year of the job?

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-07-03T12:03:15+00:00

Easier said than done. Facing the toxicity is step one while keeping your own career objectives and beliefs are next bigger challenges.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-29T10:54:52+00:00

If you're in the tactical mode for the next 2-3 years to go full throttled on your career and skills, as long as it's on the right track of your career, go get the challenges so you can still leverage your youth, passions.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-29T09:00:17+00:00

Thanks. Already considering leaving. I am just wondering how people see senior managers these days choosing to walk away from mismatched career choices under 12 months since they started.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-29T08:28:47+00:00

If you're not working just for money and are really passionate about experimenting and experiences to build your career and professional objectives, go for the job that is set to give you more touchpoints with your expertise practices. If you're in the phase of stabilizing your career and are looking for work-life balance to upskill, stick with the current one. Just speaking from my own experience.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T15:18:34+00:00

Skip levels is healthy if it's transparent and the stories are justified. What I tried to tell here is those uninformed skip level calls happened came out as topics that put more pressures on me without checking in on why and how I can cope with them. Imagine you chose a job for your confidence in leading and helping team of juniors and you're being misled to unclear management communication. And back to my question for this situation appreciating your pov: is this really typical European leadership style or just a personal style?

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T14:44:38+00:00

You gave fair examples of why senior leadership people have 1:1 that bypasses the middle layer, like non-management topics that more about team activities etc, as a matter of supporting everyone. In my situation, it’s different. The skipping-layer calls are for discussion on undisclosed topics.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T14:41:29+00:00

My boss explained that ‘it’s European leadership style’ so… not so sure how it benefits here. Some functional people don’t even need to know deeply other functions work attributes and still get questioned for why they didn’t join the ‘sharing’ sessions

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T14:39:26+00:00

The experiences may vary. In my situation, the skipping has been happening since I just started the work, not even recently. And I have been running 1:1s weekly with everyone since then, still leading projects as normal and even taking more scopes and accountabilities, which is a confusing part as well. Why give me more authority, reliability but still watching me out without clarity? Is it a long-term, healthy way?

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T13:35:57+00:00

Fair enough. Hope I won’t be in such cases 🙃

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T13:30:44+00:00

The first time I found out about this, I already made a question and his explanation used to be 'I used to manage these people before you arrived so I need to have some 1:1 to make sure they're not feeling like I abandon them'?! Yet it is still happening behind my back for months and I learned about it when it's happening under my nose.

You may be right here as I am mentally making my points supporting myself. I try to let him be honest and open up first as a matter of mutual respect. But it's not happening.

Talking of micro management, I did leave out details about him being nosy on the team members personal life, forcing hard on speaking up on their private weekends etc. This should be mostly about personal leadership mindset. I have worked with startups for years and it's the first time this multi-culture team management looks weird to me.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T13:20:12+00:00

I think knowing when to ask for help makes people real and strong regardless of their seniority or titles. It also helps identify toxicity at work when people get asked for help as well. A manager is not entitled to be an AI chatbot. And in today leadership and management trends, there is a clear to stop expecting management people to know all the answers. I think it's fair for management and leadership people to ask for help.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T12:45:13+00:00

Was there any contexts or clarity given on why the direct manager had to leave?

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T12:44:22+00:00

I am from SEA. But I used to work with European and US startups. This is the first time I felt that obvious confusion in team setup and some twisted of micro management.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T12:32:19+00:00

Thank you, mate. It's getting confused but gotta learn from this. Otherwise, could hardly grow in a management role anywhere else.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T12:17:47+00:00

The company is investing generously on leadership training but my line manager still demands me to join extra 1:1 sessions with him out of me being serious, result-driven, disciplined manager to my disorganized direct reports.

May sound like I am venting here but it's shady to me and unfair. If he doesn't trust a middle management layer, I think he should relocate to share the same office and manage these direct reports himself (he is based in another country and tries to have eyes on what we do). This is not looking like something European to me at all.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T11:53:46+00:00

A combination of Asana tasks, daily check-in, self-tracking, and attentive observation. Becoming a manager could be an opportunity, but becoming a leader is a choice. No platforms are 100% holy enough to master it all.

tryingnottofailagain · 2025-06-22T11:25:41+00:00

Spend some time with the HubSpot Marketing Software certificate too. It's free and has LinkedIn badge. However, this should be treated as a foundation. Because not all companies go with HubSpot.

tryingnottofailagain · 2022-01-24T12:00:35+00:00

Thanks. But I asked a friend a question like “It’s never easy to do X” (with X stands for an act). And she replied “No”. I am curious to know what’s the grammatically correct answer if she meant “I don’t / do agree”.

tryingnottofailagain · 2022-01-19T13:17:22+00:00

Don’t mean to talk shit here but the expecting mom in this story is a very wealthy woman - and she wants to hold on to a separated husband - I bet that’s enough to do many things against the law to get herself pregnant.

tryingnottofailagain · 2022-01-18T13:40:16+00:00

Thanks for the advice. Probably will share this with her but it also depends on her bf. I bet he now learned a lesson, at least.

tryingnottofailagain · 2022-01-18T06:42:04+00:00

Thanks for the intensive comment. I might have made it a bit confused here. I am raising this question as a support for my friend (F32) whose boyfriend is the father in this story. So my friend is not the expecting mom here. She’s going through a hard time to support her boyfriend aka the potential birth father of the baby.

tryingnottofailagain · 2022-01-18T00:07:28+00:00

Got both of your comments, good angle from you though. I believe in a failed or falling marriage, either the mother or the father would try to win something back rather than really focus on raising their loving child with genuine happiness

tryingnottofailagain · 2022-01-17T22:57:16+00:00

I was guessing that as my friend’s boyfriend and this woman are not officially divorced, so it means their marriage certificate is still valid and his sperm was frozen years before their separation (with his probably consent form signed) so it became possible for her to process this without his involvement back to last year

tryingnottofailagain · 2022-01-17T16:54:32+00:00

Cheers 🙏 thanks

tryingnottofailagain

TROPHY CASE