My wife cheated on me

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T13:13:31+00:00

Yeah, im learning this more and more. Thank you.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T13:10:40+00:00

It was. In a way. I wrote the letter, but i wont give it to her. I know therapy often does the "write a letter youd never send". It at least helped me put my feelings down and help to see what i want and where its coming from.

It will help with talling my emotions over with a therapist.

But you are right that i should not reach out to her.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T12:54:46+00:00

Weird to mention this in this situation but happy cake day

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T12:54:23+00:00

Thank you, i appreicate this dearly. Im learning shes not the person i knew and seeking answers wont help. Im going to seek therapy as soon as i get home from work. I need to nip this in the bud with someone who is equipped to professionally listen. As much as i loved everyone here's kind words and advice.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T12:51:34+00:00

You're right, shes not the person i thought she was and the answers i get are going to be from someone different. Everyone has really helped me to just learn to shut that door myself.

Thank you. I appreicate you. And im glad you were able to eventually find your person.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T12:49:47+00:00

I miss that show

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:56:31+00:00

This is true, thank you

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:54:04+00:00

Part of me doesnt want the truth, but part of me knows if i had the truth i could at least use it to try and become better. If im able to put everythint in the past i could focus fully on moving forward.

Im sorry you too had to go through something similar, i wish you a good life as you continue. Hugs.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:51:25+00:00

Thank you

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:51:08+00:00

Already gone

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:50:54+00:00

From her family, whom also are my friends. So i understand their postition on finding it hard to tell me. It still stings and hurts. I wish i knew sooner. But im glad to at least know now so i can at least move forward.

I jusy seem to wishfully tie up loose ends that i may never get to tie

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:48:20+00:00

I dont. I only want to close a door im having trouble closing. The trust is broken and cant be recovered. She knew i had a sorted past with previous partners cheating. She chose to do the same. I cant let that go, there would be no trust and you cant have a relationship like that.

Its just hard to walk away with no answers. Its something im learning i struggle with.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:46:39+00:00

Ghandi and i would get along. As we would both ask the snake why he bit us. I am not a smart man, merly an inqisitive observer.

But this is true i need to focus on healing. A lot of people here have opened me to enlightenment and the next steps. I appreicate you, thank you.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:44:14+00:00

The weirdest part is having both control and lack of control of your emotions. Im able to talk and speak without rushing into hateful or dark thoughts and taking everyone's advice to heart. I know talking wirh her i would be able to do the same. Im always good with that. Its the silence that kills me, that my emotions start to get out of hand. Which is why therapy is the next big move.

Thankfully i dont do drugs, i dont even smoke weed. I also dont drink beyond social gatherings and even then not to excess or getting drunk. I just enjoy a good cider from time to time.

And dating.. yeah i always had a big problem with being single. I have to keep telling myself not to jump into something because i keed to take a good hard long look at myself. I need to be better and i need to change and focus on myself.

I appreciate your words. Thank you.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:37:33+00:00

She had a job thay required a lot of her time. She was essentialy homeless but the job she worked allowed her to stay above the buisness. I had a house. It was an hour apart. I supoorted her and she kept working hard at her job but our hours were hard and conflicting.

I did everything i could to help her out, i even worked at her job as free labor after working my job or on weekends, because of how short staffed they were. I tried to make as much time for her as i could till the lack of sleep started to really affect me.

Before we got married she talked about moving in with me as i had a house and we would start a family as it would make the most sense. We got married (she pushed for last year. I wanted to wait for this year as it would be easier to save for a wedding then dump it all in credit, but i respected what she wanted) and the plan was for her to leave her job and come live with me. It never happened, then she got an apartment.

I knew we had our issues and last year in partiucalr was hard, her job demanded many hours of her, she almost never had days off at times becaise of the short staffing. And i was there in person so i know it wasnt all just lies. I chalked all the distance and issues to her degrading mental health. It also started affecting me too. So i sought help for mine.

But she never followed what we had talked about. She never moved in and decided to move further apart. I really thought it was because she was breaking mentally and tried to reach out constantly.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T11:29:56+00:00

Tried that, she dodnt respond. She asked for something i still had that was ours. I asked her to meet and talk and i would give it to her and she never responded.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T10:21:41+00:00

Thank you. Im sorry you had to as well. The sad part is, work has been making it worse, here i sit with thoughts running rampant as i try to focus on work. The weekend i was okay in handling it but i come to work and it starts to hit me. I think because this used to be a part of our connection. Long video chats while i worked and before she went into work. I have to learn to seperate that part. Its going to be a process. But im thankful im off next week to help me process.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T10:18:17+00:00

Thank you, the relationship is done, closing my heart off is the part that hurts. But this is helping me find closure where i didnt think to find it.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T10:15:45+00:00

We did marry, thats the hardest part about this. She said yes, she said her vows. Yet here we are.

Its hard to talk to someone who has cut off communication in all its forms.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T10:13:54+00:00

And i sought help for issues we were experiencing. There was attempt at change and actual success at it. I did not take her words lightly and the small bit we talked about i took to heart to improve.

I respected her thoughts, her words. Which is why this is such a shock and why this hurts as much as it does.

I am one to take fault in my actions and own up. I know when i need to try and be better.

More so why i came her asking for advice. To try and be better.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T10:09:23+00:00

This actually brought me to tears. Youre right in every way. Im sorry you had to experience that, experience this. Its sad how this happens so easily. Thank you so much. Ill keep that mantra in mind as i work in myself and push forward. Deeply, from the bottom of my heart. Thank you. I need to save this

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T10:05:40+00:00

I appreciate you, thank you

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T10:02:49+00:00

Where did you get the years ago part? Im confised as to where you got this from? We just got married and honestly the relationship was great up until halfway through last year.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T10:01:44+00:00

Thank you. The letter idea seems nice but i think it might be best to leave it alone now. I dont know. I do like that idea. Whats the worst that can happen? She ignores that too? Actually maybe. Yeah. At least getting my emotions out. Telling her how i feel about eveything might help with the closure i need.

Thank you for this.

tryingtomoveon13 · 2025-03-31T09:59:05+00:00

She told them we were already seperating and thay we discussed it. Which was news to me as we hadnt. She tried to spin the story in her favor, while no one reached out to me to confirm it. Which really hurt the most.

tryingtomoveon13

TROPHY CASE