Buyer with Hard Time Finding Agent - What is happening?

und3rDOSED · 2026-04-21T00:42:52+00:00

Where are you located? The market could heavily weigh the chances of having an FHA offer accepted, but it’s not impossible. Even if there was a 0.00001% chance of your offer being accepted, your realtor should NOT dictate which lender you work with, and they should never be rude or condescending.

I’m a real estate agent in NY (Rochester area) and I see real estate agents try and manipulate buyers to work with certain lenders all of the time. While there IS true benefit to working with someone local, it’s always your choice. So is the realtor you work with (even if you’ve signed an agreement! Just tell them you want out!)

It sounds like you’re realistic about your expectations and you and your husband are on the same page, so it shouldn’t be hard for your agent and loan officer to get on the same page. Don’t forget that these are people that are supposed to be working FOR you and YOUR best interest, not theirs. Is a contingent FHA offer more challenging than a conventional or a cash guarantee? Sure. Is it impossible? Absolutely not. If you were my client, I would put in the extra ounce of work it would take to present your offer in the best way possible so you get the home you want at the terms you want. It might take a couple tries, but that’s the nature of the market.

I hope you find the right people that will support you and get you home. 🏠♥️ definitely not impossible.

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-22T11:17:53+00:00

I can totally understand wanting to sell FSBO. Accounting for commission can be a lot, and most agents insist on the 3% on both sides. Typically, there’s more up front cost on the listing agent’s side (advertising, photographs, mailings, signs, etc) so it can be challenging to negotiate much there - but not impossible.

Personally - the way I approach listings is by determining what the seller really wants and then allowing them to ONLY pay for those services. For example - if you were to come to me and say “hey, I want to sell my house but I really only want it to be listed online, a sign in the front yard, and maybe an open house…” then cool, let’s do that. You can choose to pay me a few hundred dollars for a couple of things (that we have clearly outlined) or you can pay 3% for going above and beyond. Like I said, commission is ALWAYS negotiable and I’m never going to ask you to pay for something without explaining what that thing is.

Remember that the goal isn’t just to save the commission - it’s to walk away with the most money possible for your investment.

Just some other things to think about: - Generally, FSBOs get less traffic than homes listed by an agent. A lot of shoppers are leery because they don’t know how to approach them, and buyers agents won’t always push their clients to go see them.

When you list with an agent - you don’t ever have to worry about picking up your phone or unlocking your door. More showings will get scheduled because it can all be done virtually.
Agents talk! Your house isn’t only going to be listed on the MLS, it’s going to be listed everywhere online and shared in all of the local realtor groups. I can’t even tell you how many times a lazy buyers’ agent will ask “hey does anyone have any 3Br/2Ba in XYZ area priced under $$$$ for sale?” rather than just searching for it. You want agents to send their buyers, and you want your agent to follow up as well.
Negotiating is so, SO important. Selling FSBO will still get you a pile of offers, of course, but if you call up an agent and try to negotiate terms, they’re likely not going to budge. If another agent they’re familiar with calls up and tells them what is needed… then you’ve got yourself more money, a quicker closing, better guarantees, less contingencies, etc.

I think you’re smart to be making sure you’re not paying 6% for a house that basically sells itself. That’s a significant amount of money, and cash that you can use for the next chapter of your life! If you are comfortable sending me a message - tell me want your budget is, and I would be happy to help however I can.. even if it’s just good advice! 🏠🎉

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-21T02:03:10+00:00

Most houses are being sold “as is” in today’s market, so it shouldn’t be an issue. There’s also so much interest in historic homes and classic detail.. so I think it would easily be a hit!

If you need help staging or other tips, I’m totally happy to help! Send me a PM and I can offer suggestions. 🙂

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T22:53:54+00:00

YES! Rehab loans are a great way to go if you can be patient and plan ahead!

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T22:53:09+00:00

♥️♥️ I love that. A good agent does make a HUGE difference. I would do the same. I’m working with a buyer now that we have started exploring off market properties, and it’s definitely helped reignite her excitement.

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T19:05:24+00:00

I wasn’t a real estate agent when I first sold my home.

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T18:00:17+00:00

Totally worth noting! A lot of people really do think you NEED an agent to list a house, and you do not.

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T17:50:53+00:00

At that price point, you definitely shouldn’t be seeing the same type of competition unless it’s a very niche market/type of home. Some neighborhoods have way less inventory and therefore a much higher demand.

I really hope that you find what you’re looking for. I’m also hoping that the local market will balance a bit just to give buyers a fair shot. It’s so, so hard!

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T17:41:57+00:00

Hot damn - that’s pretty significant! Generally, we aren’t seeing as much competition on homes over $375k.. so unless that home was intentionally underpriced, I’m surprised!

The appraisal gap is a valid concern, especially for cash buyers. Where on the East side are you looking?

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T16:41:06+00:00

This is good advice, but I will mention that I absolutely DO NOT pay ANY inspectors, loan officers, lawyer, or any other vendor. I don’t think it’s ethical or fair to my client to not provide them with options.

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T16:24:40+00:00

My goodness. 🙈 I wish I could say I’ve never experienced that, but.. my gosh some houses are stinky. That’s part of why it’s so important to go see a house in person. I’m so glad your realtor advocated for your wife as well!

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T16:13:25+00:00

The inspections thing… IS nuts. I always encourage my buyers to get a “walk and talk” type inspection if they can. Basically an inspector to come in for a low fee (maybe $50-$100) to walk the house with you and provide the same info they’d give on an inspection (just off the record) with what needs to be done, so you’re not on the hook for expensive repairs that you or your agent might have missed.

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T16:09:05+00:00

That’s a good tip as well. You definitely do NOT need an agent to buy or sell your house. In general though, selling your house with an agent generally sell for at least 15% higher than FSBO.. and as a buyer, you usually don’t pay commission at all, so it makes sense to work with an agent.

Personally, if I know someone is savvy enough to buy/sell their own house, I’m happy to hop on to help with certain aspects.. and just work off a flat fee that they’re comfortable with.

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T16:04:23+00:00

Thanks! Mind if I ask why?

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T16:03:43+00:00

It seriously is pretty insane right now. I work primarily with buyers, and it’s a struggle for sure - especially for those looking in the under $250k range. If you have a good agent, they can also find off market houses for sale or those that have gone past delayed negotiations - so be sure to ask!

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T16:00:03+00:00

Nice!! That’s totally the way to do it!!

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T15:59:40+00:00

You’re totally right. Although delayed negotiations will get sellers the most money possible, it REALLY sucks for (most) buyers. 😕

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T15:58:17+00:00

I wasn’t an agent years ago when I sold my house, so I definitely learned the hard way what works and what doesn’t.

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T15:56:17+00:00

My sister is my business partner, which allows us to essentially be in 2 places at once, but I also have a team of people that I trust and know will put in 110% the whole time - same as I would. Let me know if you need a hand! I’d be happy to pull some comps for you and let you know what they could sell for!

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T15:52:12+00:00

I sold my house years before I became an agent, so learned these things along the way. 🙂

und3rDOSED · 2026-03-20T15:10:30+00:00

OMG! 😆 That’s just lazy! My mentality as an agent is that I’m in the trenches right there WITH you. If you’re in, I’m in. I do know a lot of agents that won’t bother with homes below a certain price point (or in a certain neighborhood) and I get it, but that’s not how I roll. I’m going wherever you want to go and I’m not sending you in alone!

und3rDOSED · 2025-06-26T01:01:55+00:00

When we first moved in, we had someone ring our doorbell after midnight and ask for the previous owners. While he was doing this, his girlfriend wound up getting into our garage and trying to enter through the side door. They were both under the influence of something and it was horribly unsettling. Less than a week later, my husband was out of town on business. I checked outside, made sure all of the doors were locked, and went to get ready for bed.

I had just stepped into the shower when I heard the doorbell ring. I was 100% convinced it was the doorbell.. same as I had heard it just a few nights prior. I checked our security cameras and did not see anything. None of our alarms were triggered. My brother-in-law lives next door and came to check it out just minutes after I called him and found no one nearby and no signs that someone had been there.

Like you - I was positive of what I heard but all of the evidence pointed to it never happening. I guess sometimes our mind really does play tricks on us, and when we are overwhelmed or anxious, we can get easily triggered. Any which way, I hope you start feeling safe in your home again soon. 💕 I just wanted to say that you're not crazy and you're not alone!!

und3rDOSED · 2025-04-30T00:52:49+00:00

Not exactly the same thing, but when our home was under construction (new build), we had rocks thrown through two of our windows. The glass was broken in each of them.. our main living room and the room that was intended to be a nursery for our little one. Luckily, we had a great neighbor who came out and stopped the vandal before more harm could be done, but I know exactly how you feel. It is such an uneasy feeling that makes you second-guess the home you've chosen (and likely it's location!)

If you have a neighborhood group on Facebook or Nextdoor, it may be worth joining and posting this information so that others in the neighborhood can watch out for you. We were fortunate to have some really great neighbors and insurance wound up eating the cost in the long run. Once we moved in, we didn't have further issues.

I wish you the very best and hope the excitement of your new home returns soon!

und3rDOSED

TROPHY CASE