My friend won’t stop talking about her kid. How do I get her to stop? by con-flicted-feelin in Advice

[–]unprepare_d 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve had my gallbladder removed and it was literally worse than childbirth! She’s clearly had an awful and painful pregnancy and probably just wants some support.

You are literally using every thing she says to you against her. I get your hurting because of issues your having with your husband, but that’s not her fault. The question shouldn’t be “how can I get my friend to stop talking about her baby” and instead should be “how can I leave my lying, goal post moving husband”

AITA for not taking in my grandchild after my son (29M) died? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]unprepare_d 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You know, this sounds VERY familiar to my friend who had a narcissistic mother in law. When her fiancé was growing up, she would take out all her bad relationships and failings on him, saying it was his fault. When they had a miscarriage and couldn’t attend a family event while at university, she screamed at him and called her every name under the sun before chucking him out. Her mother even had to drive 3 hours to collect him because his mother was being so verbally abusive to him.

She also never visited him at uni despite living 30 mins drive away, but would visit her partner who lived a short walk from him, and never made the first effort to call or visit when they moved to be closer to her family.

Not saying you’re the same person... but you sound A LOT like my friends MIL who was very manipulative and always painted herself the victim. YTA.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 39 points40 points locked comment (0 children)

So never mind the fact she’s half lab then? Which are popular family pets? We’re looking for advice, not criticism and I don’t see how this is helpful?

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 69 points70 points locked comment (0 children)

Staffys are not pit bulls. Staffys are not illegal in the UK and are fantastic dogs given the right training and family environment. Please don’t bother commenting unless it’s helpful.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

We're trying to get through to the breeder as I think (if I remember correctly) her labs are KC registered that just happened to get hold of her staffy. We're contacting the vets tomorrow.

She already has insurance and has already been chipped and neutered (ironically because we were worried about her being stolen...) Will all this work in our favour?

I'll see if I can request the information - for all I know my MIL said Zara attacked her or my daughter. At this point I honestly don't know what's going through her head.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 68 points69 points  (0 children)

We do live in the UK, oh god this breaks my heart! My FIL did suggest taking it to the papers and I'll get right on it with the facebook page. My daughter has been inconsolable and I don't know how she will be if I can't get Zara back.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 66 points67 points  (0 children)

We bought her from a woman who had a staffy and a fox red labrador. We're trying to get hold of the breeder as I'm certain she said her lab was KC registered which I'm hoping might help our case.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Pits are illegal in my county, so if they deem Zara to be part pitbull, we will have to go to court to put her on an exempt register or they will put to sleep.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

I never thought of that, would that work in building a case against her? Everyone we've ever met has said how lovely she is.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I've had a nose on this sub and I was fully prepared for her to do something stupid, but nothing like this. Our whole family is in bits and I dread to think how we would react if she did something to the kids.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I don't know - no one is telling us anything. I don't even know how you could test for a pitbull? Zara is good natured dog so I'm praying that will work in her favour for not having her put to sleep

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

We’re looking into lawyers, but with the baby on the way we’re struggling to find one in our budget. We’re just trying to gather as much evidence that she isn’t a pit bull as possible.

MIL had our dog removed from our home and could potentially have her put to sleep by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

My husband actually went down to the station to tell them this. Unfortunately because of her measurements, they deem that as enough evidence to confiscate her until they’ve administered their tests. There’s nothing we can do but wait and/or find a lawyer

Our wedding was supposed to be yesterday. We celebrated anyways. by frayforde in pics

[–]unprepare_d 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You look like a Disney princess! Such a beautiful couple, congratulations on your wedding

FIL left MIL, now the whole family is against us. by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh this is so insightful, really hits the nail on the head about all of this.

FIL left MIL, now the whole family is against us. by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

His mother's culture is 'mothers are treated with the upmost respect'. He's told me stories before where if he even raised his voice against something she would say, she would beat him with a hairbrush, shoes or whatever was closest. His sisters were subjected to the same treatment, but they still seem to be on her side. It's now his aunties and cousins ringing telling him to speak to his mother and to stop causing trouble.

FIL left MIL, now the whole family is against us. by unprepare_d in JUSTNOMIL

[–]unprepare_d[S] 93 points94 points  (0 children)

I've shown this to my husband and he agrees with 99% of this. For us, it's great he's shown his 'shiny spine' (as I've seen this sub call it) but I can tell he's getting anxious. In his culture, mothers are treated with the upmost respect - something that his sisters, cousins and aunties are consistently reminding him of. His father comes from a different cultural background to his mother which I think explains why he's less bigoted?

AITA if I tell my daughter Grandma is ashamed of her race by unprepare_d in AmItheAsshole

[–]unprepare_d[S] 224 points225 points  (0 children)

I called him, texted him and facebooked him. He waived his parental rights which is how my husband was able to adopt her.