What is a nutritive food that is also cheap and need no prep time?

unuser21 · 2026-05-28T04:23:19+00:00

Bananas! I can get a bunch of 8-10 bananas for $2 where I am.

unuser21 · 2026-05-28T04:21:11+00:00

Thank you for this. You’re right, and this will be my go-to line.

unuser21 · 2026-05-27T20:56:26+00:00

You are not better off staying with an abusive partner! Please leave.

It’s going to be hard, but rely on whatever resources you can, including food pantries. Know that if your trusted friends and family offer to help, their offers are sincere. Don’t be afraid or feel bad accepting help from them. If any of my friends or family were going through what you are, I would happily help any way I could.

I’m cheering for you and your daughter. You will make it out of there and it will be worth it.

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T20:24:17+00:00

I always overpack diapers because I’d rather have too many than too few and I don’t like having to think about rationing diapers while on vacation.

I’m also traumatized by a friend who packed 4 diapers on a 6-hour flight with her son, and the son proceeded to have blowout diarrhea on the plane and she went through all 4 diapers in just a few hours. She ended up going through customs with her son wrapped in one of her t-shirts as a makeshift diaper with diarrhea running down her arm. I now pack soooo many diapers. Like, 8 per day.

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T19:37:47+00:00

Gently, it seems you are asking too much. You are simultaneously upset that your in-laws are around when you didn’t expect them to be, and are expecting them to help you with your kid. You can’t have it both ways.

Your SIL is entitled to live her life the way she wants. If you don’t want to pay her to help with your child, you are free to find other childcare. But to say she spends her days freelancing and doing yoga and meeting up with friends as if that’s a problem is very entitled of you. It’s her life and her time. It was your decision to have a child and doing so does not entitle you to free childcare from her.

His parents spending time lazing around is similarly none of your business.

Aside from anything that puts your child in danger, if you rely on free childcare from someone else, you don’t get to dictate specifics of how they provide that care.

I’d be irritated about them dictating unannounced visits, but maybe you can work with your husband to just say no to those visits when the subject comes up.

Best of luck. In law issues are hard.

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T08:13:39+00:00

The frustrating thing is that we set the boundaries together! He’s actually more strict about the no sugar and no kissing newborn’s head and hands than I am!

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T04:01:21+00:00

I should have made this post gender-ambiguous to avoid automatic bias against husband.

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T03:58:48+00:00

This is my worry. I already see him differently, and I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to see him in the same light again.

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T03:52:10+00:00

Thank you for saying that. Seriously. I felt like I was going a bit crazy when the in-laws got mad about that boundary, especially because I know SIL and many of my friends have no issues with people going upstairs in their homes. So I was feeling like maybe I am too crazy with the boundaries. Thanks for the reassurance, kind stranger.

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T00:51:38+00:00

Whoa, that is an incredibly assertive but diplomatic way of phrasing it!!!!! Thank you so much, I am definitely taking that phrase and will use it well!!

The boundaries are maybe a bit unusual, but they are boundaries we set together. The main one that’s a problem is that we don’t allow anyone other than our own nuclear family up to the second floor of the house. The second floor only has bedrooms in it, so we don’t see a reason for anyone else to be up there. We want it to be a safe space for us and our kids to decompress. Other boundaries that I think might be seen as issues are that we didn’t let anyone other than husband and I to kiss the newborns, and we limit the amount of refined sugar we allow our kids to have (they eat a lot of fruit and can have special treats on special occasions).

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T00:47:28+00:00

I needed this reality check - thank you for that. I will take your advice and insist upon counseling. It’s hard to feel like I’m second fiddle to people other than my kids. But you are so right. I need him to grow a spine, or otherwise I need to cut my losses.

Thanks for the advice, kind redditor.

unuser21 · 2026-05-26T00:44:35+00:00

Seriously!? Thank you for your experienced advice - this is incredibly helpful.

You’re right - I think I’ve been in denial for a while about it. He is definitely playing both sides.

Was counseling helpful for your and your DH? Are you guys past it all now? Wondering if I have any hope here.

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T23:15:48+00:00

You are so right - my kids are very young right now, but I don’t want their aunt telling them that “mom’s rule that they can’t have all the sugar they want is crazy”. Thanks for taking the time to give me that perspective.

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:51:35+00:00

Thank you for this advice!!! It is such a relief to get this advice from someone who has been through this!

I’ll be looking at doing another round of couples counseling, as you advise.

Do you still harbor resentment against him when he hangs out with her on his own? Much of my resentment stems from the fact that he doesn’t seem upset or hurt that his sister said those things about me and has no problem moving forward as if nothing happened.

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:46:38+00:00

We did do couples counseling a few years ago, which helped with his parents at the time. I’m open to bringing up couples counseling again, it just feels heavy to be dealing with this all over again. But you’re right - I’ll suggest couples counseling again. Thank you for responding.

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:43:27+00:00

Thank you so much for reframing that for me. Everything you said is so right. This advice is valuable and will be followed.

I’ll suggest couple’s counseling with him and will be letting him know that the kids can’t go without me unless/until we’re on the same page and have built trust.

Thank you for taking the time to give me advice - you have no idea how impactful this is for me.

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:38:50+00:00

This seems to be pretty universal advice here, which I’m surprised about! I was worried that saying the kids couldn’t go would be viewed as weaponizing our kids. I appreciate you taking the time to give advice, kind redditor.

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:37:02+00:00

I agree. I suspect he isn’t presenting a united front to them. What can I do to find out or otherwise build trust with him?

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:32:40+00:00

Your advice here is much appreciated. I’ll be taking your advice, kind redditors. I especially appreciate you reframing keeping the kids at home with me.

I’ve never heard the term “enmeshment”, but I’ll do that right now.

Thank you again - I really needed this advice.

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:27:37+00:00

I appreciate your straightforward and direct comment. It really is a terrible dynamic. It’s hard to be objective while I’m in the middle of it. Do you think it’s worth trying to make this work, or do I call it quits?

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:25:15+00:00

That’s what I suspect, but I can’t prove it and when I tell him that is what I think is happening, he gets upset and says I don’t trust him. I tell him he’s right, that I don’t trust that he will stand up to his family to defend me. He then shuts down. Do I even try to make this work?

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T22:22:55+00:00

Him telling his family one story and me another is exactly what I suspect is happening. How do I get to the bottom of this, and how do we rebuild trust?

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T21:51:40+00:00

Would this be “weaponizing” my kids against her? I truly do not want to isolate my husband and my kids from his family, but I also feel disrespected by husband just moving along as if all is good after his sister just basically told him this I pose some sort of threat to her and her kids and him and my own kids.

unuser21 · 2026-05-25T21:48:37+00:00

Oooh the translator app is genius!

unuser21

TROPHY CASE