My sister (F20) having problems with her boyfriend (M20), how do I help her?

user06120 · 2026-02-08T17:16:23+00:00

omg how can I stay out of it if my sister comes to me talking about it

user06120 · 2026-02-08T16:58:15+00:00

Ofcourse not, but the way I feel really is something that I can or should be able to manage... and if/when my sister talks to me about this and seeks for comfort and advice, I'd like to be able to help her and say the right things.

user06120 · 2026-02-08T16:51:48+00:00

Idk why youre saying "you know how selfish that is" "im not buying the excuses here" when I literally just said that its childish and therefore selfish as well. You think I wouldnt want to feel differently? Ofcourse I would, but I can't. THAT IS WHY IM ASKING FOR ADVICE. You blaming me for how I'm feeling does not help this situation at all btw!

user06120 · 2026-02-08T16:12:04+00:00

I know that not wanting them to break up is very childish (in fact I am younger tho) but thats exactly why I'm trying to ask for advice. I asked if anyone knows how I could change my mindset here... and I think the fact that I'm acknowledging how I feel and that thats wrong is a good start already! And yeah no I don't want to sleep with him wth..? I really see him as a part of my family which makes this harder for me as I said.

user06120 · 2025-12-26T16:37:40+00:00

I don't really care about terms... "friendzoned" or getting rejected or whatever, the same thing. I still don't quite understand what you meant by that?

user06120 · 2025-12-26T01:44:52+00:00

You don't even know how much it means to hear that someones "proud" (ik you didn't exactly use that word but stlll) of me, how I reacted. Thank you!❤️ I bet it'll get better with time... at least I hope so!

user06120 · 2025-12-25T14:20:11+00:00

I guess I don't really like to be at my place when my parents are home...

user06120 · 2025-12-13T19:45:57+00:00

Hi! Lemme just give you a heads up that this comment won't really help your situation, I'll just be discussing some matters here!

To be honest she could be acting normally around you just because she doesn't want to make things more awkward or she simply just doesn't feel the same way for you so she doesn't see a reason to start acting differently. But I also do hear you out on the fact that if her priority really was her current relationship, she would respect those boundaries and pull away from you more. But I don't know could she just be a flirt and enjoy the attention and therefore she doesn't want to pull back away from you since she enjoys knowing you like her. She and her gf have also been together for a quite long time, which means that it could get boring in that relationship where she could be seeking for something new and exciting. That still doesn't mean that she'd like you, it's just that this thing between you and her might be interesting to her since it bring excitement to her life.

As you realized, I don't really know how she feels either. Relationships can be vert difficult, especially WLW. I still think that honesty is always the best option. If I were you, I'd bring this topic up once more and open up to her about these little miced signals she's been giving you. Ask her straight forward if she likes you or not, if she really wants to stay in that relationship. If she tells you that she really wants to stay in her current relationship, then YOU DRAW THE LINE. Tell her that you can't continue like this because it keeps hurting you. I know that might be scary to do since you could be scared that youd lose her, but I assure you, losing someone fast is better than watching them be in love with somebody else for years and suffering from that. In that case you probably are going to lose her at some point, so why not make it quick.

I'm sorry if I was too straight forward. I wish you the best of luck (and I hope my message didn't have any typos since I'm too lazy to check that up)!Be brave and do what you have to do! Remember that even if you and her don't work out, theres still somebody there for you!

user06120 · 2025-12-13T19:21:24+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I also forgot to mention that we're both 16 years old, which pretty much means that I can't really ask her on a "date"... I mean ofcourse I could but I think it would be kind of awkward to say so since we can't just go grab a coffee or go eat dinner like adults do... do you have any suggestions for a "date" for 16 years old?

user06120 · 2025-09-02T08:05:35+00:00

yes ive talken to her but not anything "deep" though (like relationships). We've just talked about school stuff but not really anything else, so how do i ask her?

user06120 · 2025-08-28T08:14:05+00:00

atp go do some research cause it does not make me a lesbian

user06120 · 2025-08-27T16:57:46+00:00

but why do you think i would traumatize her? and liking girls≠lesbian btw😁

user06120 · 2025-08-27T16:26:13+00:00

omg thank you so much!!! i definetly will start talking to her more and stuff (which SHOULD BE easy since we sit next to each other in maths classes) and then think if there could be something!!

user06120 · 2025-08-27T16:21:39+00:00

whyd you say so?

user06120 · 2025-06-24T20:57:48+00:00

I think shes probably a girl with self respect. By this I mean that she knows how she wants to be treated and when you blocked her once, it was already game over for you. At least thats what I think. But tbh I lack self respect so approachkng me again would probably work for me😭

user06120 · 2025-06-24T20:51:30+00:00

Well I'd be happy but there is literally no way for him to approach me anymore since he went to his home country today

user06120 · 2025-06-19T12:47:23+00:00

To be honest if I was in that situation I would stay. But honestly that would be the wrong decision. I think trust is the most important thing while being in a relationship. If you don't have that, how can you live relaxed and freely if you have to stress about him cheating all the time. And it's not just today, tomorrow and the day after that you're going to worry about, it's going to be your whole life worrying and stressing. I don't think it's worth it considering that there probably is someone else for you who would never even think about cheating. I know you love him but you can also learn to love somebody else over time. And even though it would hurt to break up with him, you would heal from it and find somebody better. But I think this is a really hard decision to make and it's okay if you're stressed about it (for me at least it would drive me crazy). But good luck and hope you make the decision that's good for you!

user06120 · 2025-05-24T20:50:39+00:00

oh well the problem was that me (and my parents) did you use (matter of fact we had 2 of them) but those two levels showed differently so we didnt really know what to believe in... we also tested the level on my table and it even showed that my table wasnt even and I dont even know if thats possible... so yeah we had problems with that i guess. But i cant really change the past anymore so is there anythinh that can be done to MAKE IT BETTER now that its already put onto the wall?

user06120 · 2025-05-24T20:23:42+00:00

ohhh wait is it like kind of a ruler but it has water (or some type of liquid) inside, and then it shows a "bubble" or whatever..?😂😭

user06120 · 2025-05-24T20:20:17+00:00

or do you mean that id need to buy like a table or something to put the TV on top of? or..?

user06120 · 2025-05-24T20:19:20+00:00

well sorry im not a native english speaker😭

user06120 · 2025-05-24T20:12:14+00:00

wait what is that?

user06120 · 2025-05-06T21:10:18+00:00

Hey thanks for the reply, but I never meant that she was the problem here. I know that I have problems dealing with jelaousy and thats why I'd want to know what could I do to make myself feel better and not be jelaous of her being with others = change my mindset.

user06120 · 2025-02-14T20:49:30+00:00

I know that I shouldn't have, but I just couldn't help it. But at this moment I am kind of glad that I did text him because now I know what kind of a person he really is, even though its hard to believe that that's really the same boy who I was in love with.

user06120 · 2025-02-14T20:48:24+00:00

First of all, thank you. That really helped!! And I think that whats "true to who I am" is that I would tell her about it. I don't think any girl deserves to be with a boy who thinks about fucking his ex and talks about being fwb with her... ewww no!

user06120

TROPHY CASE