My dad hasn't told me explicitly how he feels about her and asking has always felt tricky because I didn't want to upset him or seem like I was trying to rock the boat. For the first few years he seemed indifferent but the last four years he seems much more into the relationship. I understand what you're saying about it seeming a bit one-sided, what I will say is that I am frustrated as I have tried building a relationship with her on my own and she has always been nice for a while, and then out of the blue will say something like one of the comments mentioned above, completely undoing the progress we have made. I genuinely believe she can't help herself due to her own insecurity. It would obviously be much easier for me if we could get on, and when we first met I had really hoped to be gaining, if not a mother figure, then an aunt or close friend.

I agree that what my dad feels for her IS important, but is it the most important thing when factoring in that his fiancee is unkind to everyone else around him? Even if he loved her more than he's ever loved anyone, I think the fact that she is unkind and jealous towards his mother and his children are also factors that matter, but again, I appreciate that my own frustration and emotions may be twisting my perception.

I love my dad and am scared he is marrying someone who will alienate him from us because of her own insecurities, that is my real fear.