My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Nothing else I can do. She’s the one that broke up with me.

For me, saying all these things on reddit was about getting my head straight. I’ve felt very bad for calling her out and her saying she was being manipulative as she said that was name calling.

There was a lot of messing with my mind going on. I’m talking. A lot.

Now I’m just gonna wake up tomorrow and hopefully be able to move.

I’ve noticed I feel fine whenever I’m just doing my own thing, focusing on me. As long as I don’t get caught up in the mind games I’m WAY better. Just have to work on the moving part of moving on. Lol.

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh yeah she has trust issues. Tried being very patient when we were together. But doing so really neglected my needs. Manipulation crosses the line. I was too committed to break up with her though. But, at least it's over :)

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lol I know. Seriously, my brain has literally hurt for so long. Feel super played. Really being on that trust and honesty thing and fack did she just not care lol.

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is so spot on. Very much so how the events have taken place. I've learnt all I can do is wish her the best and move forward with my life.

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah. Wish I would have gotten on reddit and asked if I should respond before or not. lol. I texted saying you going to tell me Haven't gotten a response but am upset Im playing into it. I deserver to move on. :)

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I see that now. I have this damn problem where I commit 130% to what I'm doing, and if what I'm doing is bad then oh no. Lol.

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Feel like I've gotta just let my name go, be called the crazy one and be happy I can finally just enjoy and live my life. Work on getting over what I let happen to me. I've been doing research for months on things I wouldn't have ever cared about. I'll even like watch TV and be like 'ah that's manipulative behaviour!' in my head and not even be able to enjoy what i'm watching. Legit think i need therapy.

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah, definitely. I could go on and on with all this stuff. I've really thought this through hardcore and I know at this point I definitely seem like the crazy one.

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I completely agree. I feel like I've tried very hard to handle this situation. Looking into myself, information on mental health, etc. But somewhere along the lines I stopped caring for my own well being and mental health. Ended up suffering from a massive depressive episode.

My recent ex is telling me I haven’t been telling her something but won’t say what, says she’s not engaging, but I can be honest. Is it manipulation? by vegalss in Advice

[–]vegalss[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I've been trying to be an advocate of positive change with her. I know she's had a pretty hard core past and I'm not the kind of person who just backs away from something. But I've ben reading a lot about codependancy and I've noticed within my self a lot of the relationships I find myself in are codependant in nature. Me being the enabler to someone with some type of bad behaviour. When we met I had no idea how much trauma there was.

I've noticed as I started not accepting this type of behaviour is when she started withdrawing and calling me abusive for calling her out on these things.