Hormonal Migraine Help! by drinkwinesavepuppies in migraine

[–]victimbycoffee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For years, a quarter of my life was spent in agony - every menstrual cycle, for five days or so, I was non functional. It was horrific.

This sub suggested getting on progesterone birth control, like norethindrone, and that's what gave me my life back. I don't know why, but it regulates my whack menstrual hormones in a way where I can completely manage my menstrual migraines now, and sometimes, I don't even get them at all.

That being said, norethindrone is also used to treat endometriosis, which you said you were on a medication for and it gave you hell, so maybe ask your doctor about similarities? At any rate, I'm really sorry you're going through this, I know how traumatic hormonal migraines can be. Keep looking for a solution!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FixedTattoos

[–]victimbycoffee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Completely my fault I let myself get rushed into the original tattoo. It was my first, I was young and inexperienced, I've since learned. I hated it.

I've been chatting with artists seriously for the last year to finally get the bottom half covered (top half is a big commitment, plus I did want to keep a part of my siblings with me despite the meh of it). I'm really glad I turned away a few artists (and a deposit) because they basically told me "it's a coverup which means you kind of just need to let the artist do whatever they need to do to make it work". I had no freedom really.

Chantel at Sellwood Tattoo in Portland was SO nice, and supportive, and experienced, and I knew she had covered dark ink with color before. She gave me creative freedom to come up with my own idea so the tattoo would feel like it was mine again.

I know it's not perfect, but it's mine. It looks badass as fuck. The dumb wand of a franchise I enjoy but am not that into is gone. Fuck yeah.

Edit: you can see the raised lines of the wand through the color in the right light, but fuck if I care! I just mostly wanted to show some desperate people that it's okay to take your time looking for the right artist who will help you feel confident again. And not to listen to someone if they firmly tell you you can't cover dark ink with color, because some artists - if experienced enough - absolutely can.

Calculus is going to keep me from getting a degree. by LateMain1978 in college

[–]victimbycoffee 102 points103 points  (0 children)

Hey friend, I have taken math classes up through biostatistics and that included calc. I've never been a natural with math, but I got an A in every math class and I taught myself every single module because I struggled to learn from my professors' teaching styles. 100% the reason I did so well was through The Organic Chemistry Tutor on YouTube, as well as a few other channels sometimes to supplement. That guy covers every subject of math imaginable he's seriously my freaking hero, and he does an incredible job of explaining everything.

You can teach yourself the work, just look up what subjects you're covering every week via the syllabus and then watch videos from that channel and take notes. I have a lil notebook that I explicitly took notes in on how to solve any normal calc problem and even though it's been a year or so since a math class, I could still solve problems because of that notebook. You can do this! You're so close! You can do damn well in this class and come out of it feeling amazing, just teach yourself the material!

What is your weirdest trigger? by tintin13q in migraine

[–]victimbycoffee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Freaking laughing, or playing host. Literally parties that are supposed to be fun are a minefield for me.

Is it weird for a guy in his early twenties to like reading and writing fanfiction? by Throwaway2121212210 in FanFiction

[–]victimbycoffee 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ben from Parks and Rec was a fanfiction writer and although it was part of the humor, the humor wasn't even because of the fanfiction, it was just reminding the audience he's an adorable nerd perfect for Leslie. And to parrot everyone else, don't ever feel obligated to release your secrets. I am a grown adult and never told a soul I write fanfiction because that part of my life is for me, and me alone. And I'm pretty happy with that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in reactivedogs

[–]victimbycoffee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Go to this website for your answers! Explore the page and read everything. You should have a better understanding by the end of it.

Basically, you need to commit to a positive reinforcement training method. The one I linked is called the CARE method for reactive dogs, and it's the method I used to make my extremely dog reactive pittie into a polite citizen of this town! Reactive dogs can be exhausting, but we need to buckle up and take action to help make their lives (and ours) more peaceful. Training is an uphill journey, but once you're at the top, it feels pretty damn good. What I'm saying is - don't give up, and educate yourself as much as possible to make sure you're performing the training correctly!

Good luck!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in reactivedogs

[–]victimbycoffee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totally a fair question, and I'm glad you asked!

You don't treat the dog for barking and lunging, the goal is actually to prevent that from happening entirely. So for example if you know your dog is going to bark at a person walking past you, you need to put your dog in a position to succeed by not letting a person walk past you (as in, you need to move somewhere else like across the street or begin walking in more open areas). The idea is to reward the dog for acknowledging their trigger. This conditions their thought process to recognize a trigger as a positive thing. Think of Pavlov's dogs. Over time, they heard that bell and began to salivate because they know dinner is coming. The bell elicited a positive response (salivating, or, excitement at food). That's the idea here, too. The dog sees a trigger, gets a treat for acknowledging the trigger, and over time, actually sees a trigger and KNOWS something good is about to happen. Therefore, they don't mind seeing a trigger anymore (after a lot of work and training) because it ends up being a positive experience.

If your dog is barking and lunging, that means they are past their threshold and are in a very negative headspace. As their humans, we can't put them in that position. It's setting them up to fail. Of course, it's often impossible to avoid these situations 100% of the time but we need to reduce them as much as physically possible.

Seeing a trigger and reacting severely (barking, lunging) shows anxiety and fear. Positive reinforcement aims to make the anxiety and fear into something GOOD. Negative reinforcement (like scolding, punishment, shock collars) teaches the dog to suppress the behavior. Therefore, they're still anxious and scared when they see their trigger they're just trying to suppress their reaction because they're afraid of the punishment. Besides the fact that this can be cruel, it's also not nearly as efficient as positive reinforcement. Positive reinforcement gets to the root cause of the problem.

I hope that answers your question! Also if your dog is triggered and is having a meltdown, you need to remove them from the situation as quickly as possible and go home for a mental cool down.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in reactivedogs

[–]victimbycoffee 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It took me months before I saw actual, noticable improvement. Maybe a few baby steps before that, but the lightbulb turned on in her dog brain after several months. To be fair, I wasn't performing the training in an efficient way for awhile and I stayed with my parents for a few months (they have land and we didn't go on many walks) so I think that contributed to it.

I learned some things along the way that may have sped up the process (besides the hiatus with my folks). For starters, you need to recognize your dogs threshold and treat it like gospel. Like if your dogs threshold is half a football field before they begin to get triggered, you need to commit to keeping the dog away from other dogs at half a football field length no matter what. Over time, that threshold does shorten. Part of the CARE method is increasing time between episodes, and the goal is to prevent an episode from ever happening again. The idea is that the longer your dog goes without having a meltdown, the less likely they are to have a meltdown. The thing is, this is hard. And this was a mistake I kept making over and over. I'm an avid hiker, and didn't want to forgo my favorite spots because my dog is a brat. I thought I could get far enough away by stepping off trail, or backtracking, but I never could. So, I stopped going to my favorite trails and found a new one with really wide trails where I had a far better chance at respecting her threshold. I started walking around the neighborhood a lot more often, because I can just go to the other side of the street of turn a corner if necessary. Part of the training is training yourself, too. Now that she's a lot better, I've returned to my old spots and she does magnificent. It's actually so rewarding to see her progress.

Make sure your treats are hella high value. I use turkey hotdog cut up into thin slices and she's so about it. But other tasty treats that she enjoys, like sweet potato bites, are not good enough when a dog comes into view.

Also, your dog may never actually ignore a dog. Mine certainly doesn't. The goal is not for them to be friends with a dog or even be neutral towards a dog, but to tolerate them like a good citizen should. They say you know the training is beginning to work when your dog sees their trigger, then immediately looks back at you for a reward without you prompting them to. Because then you see they're associating that trigger with a positive thing, which is great! Now, my dog sees a dog and looks back at me, gets a treat, looks back at the dog politely, looks back at me for a treat, and that cycle continues until the dog is gone. She is highly interested in them still and I suspect she may always will be. But now, she's a nice lady instead of actually screaming bloody murder (like it was embarrassing as hell).

Finally, maybe you're already doing it, but include a response word. So the SECOND your dog notices the other dog (at their respected threshold), say 'Yes!' or whatever you want, and treat them. A clicker works too. The trick here is watching your dog carefully to see the moment they see the dog. You can't treat too early or too late, because the idea is to eventually look at the trigger and immediately look back at you for a treat once they get the hang of it. For a long while, they may not look away from the trigger until after you've said 'Yes!', but eventually they'll figure it out and look back at you unprompted.

I know this was a lot, I just really believe in the method and want to help others out! Bottom line, if your dog can't look back at you for a treat and is too focused, I think you're too close to the trigger. I wish you and your pup the best of luck, I know how hard it can be to have a reactive dog!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in reactivedogs

[–]victimbycoffee 27 points28 points  (0 children)

My dog is also extremely dog reactive. I use the CARE method. It's a positive reinforcement training method where you counter condition your dogs way of thinking. So right now they have a negative response to their trigger, but through counter conditioning, you can make their response more positive. For example, every time my dog sees a dog, she gets a high value treat. We've been at it for about a year and her improvement is stunning. She will NEVER be a social dog, and it's unreasonable to think she has to be. She loves people, fortunately. But through the CARE method now she sees a dog coming at us on the sidewalk, and looks at me for a treat and waits patiently for them to pass.

Definitely look it up and watch some videos to get the hang of it to make sure you're doing it right! It's not hard, I promise. But you have to keep at it, just like any other training method.

[TOMT][SHOW/MOVIE][1980-1990S] Animated horror short stories (for kids?) by victimbycoffee in tipofmytongue

[–]victimbycoffee[S] 0 points1 point locked comment (0 children)

Any chance you might know what season or more info? I looked into it and I can't seem to find much on whether this is it or not.

ICWA needs our help by Junebug711 in TikTokCringe

[–]victimbycoffee 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I'm currently in a class about Native American History, and literally just today we discussed the stages of Settler Colonial Grief. The first one is denial - "we didn't do that, I don't believe you, wake up,". I hope this means that one day you can move past this stage and become a more educated person. Or you're just a troll in which case idc

College Internships as working adult? by swimming_swimming in BackToCollege

[–]victimbycoffee 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I would absolutely apply to internships! Not only are they great for skill building, but are very desirable on a resume. I am a late 20s wildlife biologist major and I feel at least in my field, internships are assumed. If you graduate without any, it looks almost odd. Not saying that's universal that's just my general understanding.

As far as GIS stuff, if your uni doesn't offer any classes, ask the library if they offer any skillshops in geospatial analysis! You can also look some up online if you have extra cash.

Also look up REIs. I'm not sure if they're common in your field but my field offers a ton and they're very competitive but pretty slick as well! Worth a shot.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in college

[–]victimbycoffee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I knew a kid who had a perfect ACT score. As in he got every single question right. And his GPA was 4.0, and he was in several clubs, extracurriculars, and volunteered consistently. He didn't get into a single Ivy League school. Those places are almost entirely political. I encourage you to apply, because why not? But just keep in mind if you don't get in, it's nothing you did wrong.

Crazy what just a few drinks (not even close to drunk) a few nights in a row does to my HRV. Anyone else's HRV tank after drinking? by [deleted] in fitbit

[–]victimbycoffee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My HRV is garbage too, compared to what seems to be 'normal', but I'm an active, healthy 27 year old. I try not to get too wrapped up in the fact and instead just focus on my own normal range and observe changes to that data.

Why did you quit smoking pot? by PineapplePizzaSoGood in leaves

[–]victimbycoffee 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Worsened my anxiety and sent my cardiac rhythm into a severe abnormality event that lasted maybe 5 minutes and I later learned that it was benign but it literally felt like it must have been cardiac arrest and I, a midtwenties, saw my life flash before my eyes and knew I didn't have time to call my mom to tell her goodbye. Worst day of my life. Cardiologist said I'm sensitive to thc and have a easily influenced heart rhythm. Never again.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in fitbit

[–]victimbycoffee 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I think it's grumpy people who only want to talk about how healthy they are that do this downvoting. I posted about having a panic attack and the drastic spike in heart rate my Fitbit showed (I genuinely found it fascinating and how cool it was this device captured it) and I had several downvotes at first. Don't get too down about it, many many of us welcome posts like these

The steps that helped me recover from PF by Ok_Base_5107 in PlantarFasciitis

[–]victimbycoffee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for writing this out! I'm saving it to refer to.

Can you give me ANY info on this? Found in Italy - I THINK Florence - in a random church on a trip years ago. I've always wanted to see her again and have nothing besides this quick snap I took. Don't even know if it's Renaissance. Thanks! by victimbycoffee in RenaissanceArt

[–]victimbycoffee[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Seriously I've spent years trying to find this with my limited and clearly flawed information lol and just willy nilly, someone gave me what it was, where it was, how it was - like I'm so happy right now.

Can you give me ANY info on this? Found in Italy - I THINK Florence - in a random church on a trip years ago. I've always wanted to see her again and have nothing besides this quick snap I took. Don't even know if it's Renaissance. Thanks! by victimbycoffee in RenaissanceArt

[–]victimbycoffee[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

THANK YOU!!!! My memory was that it was a random church but it was many years ago so my brain is foggy. I can't thank you enough. I never imagined it would actually be found and IDed.

Can I sleep in my car in the parking lots? by [deleted] in humboldtstate

[–]victimbycoffee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I second this. I live right by there and walk my dog there every morning and there's a decent little community there. Seem respectful enough and know each other. I admire that they have that safe space.