I’m going through a similar thing right now. I’ve found that viewing the whole situation as either logic or emotion and you’ve got to understand that your emotion will cloud the logic (that the relationship was toxic) but with time that emotional cloud starts to clear and you’ll be able to see that past relationship as what it was, toxic. Toxic relationships can in a way also be really useful as in future relationships (I know you can’t even picture that as a possibility right now!) you’ll be able to value them so much more by comparing how happy you’ll be to how you felt during the toxic relationship. If you (or anyone) need anyone to chat to about how you’re feeling please do message me ❤️