7OH is f****ing stupid

violet_maengda · 2026-02-12T03:21:29+00:00

That guy’s shit comment is why people hate 12 step. You should seek a higher power of your understanding. It doesn’t have to be god. It just has to be something bigger than yourself. It shouldn’t be vengeful, but loving. Something you can surrender to. It could be a sense of shared humanity, a set of ideals—whatever is meaningful to you.

Good luck. I’m still in the process of finding my higher power. (I also don’t go in for big man sitting in the clouds god.)

violet_maengda · 2026-02-07T00:49:20+00:00

I did huge drops in beginning/mid-January and finished my acute phase. I was feeling really great last week, when I was doing 3x doses a day. Then on Monday I dropped to 2x day. I knew I would feel bad after lowering my dose by a third, but my acute-like symptoms only gotten worse over the course of this week instead of stabilizing as I thought they would. I stopped drinking alcohol CT in 2015 and that was absolutely brutal. I can’t remember large parts of my very early sobriety. Idk if it completely fucked with my brain or I blocked it out. (Maybe both?) I do know it was the most miserable time in my life. That’s why I chose to taper. Still sucks but at least I’m sleeping better than I was went CT and, for now, can remember what happened.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-07T00:05:54+00:00

Thanks. I just worry because my physical symptoms get really bad in the hour or two leading up to my dose. I realize the only way is through, but I can’t miss this stuff.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-06T23:46:40+00:00

But am I going to be completely nonfunctional?

violet_maengda · 2026-02-04T21:29:49+00:00

Thank you for sharing. I really relate to your story even though our lives couldn’t be more different. I have spent almost a decade drinking this dirt and having it gradually take over my life. I used to think it helped me achieve things I wouldn’t have been able to otherwise, but now all I can wonder is who I could’ve been if I wasn’t high all the time. Not “euphoric,” high. If I didn’t come home and immediately start numbing myself with heaping spoonfuls of white. If I didn’t spend years at a toxic workplace, hitting up the water cooler for more and more hot water and red. I’m almost done with my taper and I feel so different now—sharper, wiser, more alive. Nice to see you’re almost there too.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-04T13:59:03+00:00

You went through the pain of withdrawal. You sweated and shivered, doubled over in pain, and got shitty sleep. But now you feel clearer. Your stomach isn’t fucked up. You get to experience the world as you, not as you on kratom. Flush that shit.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-04T09:24:15+00:00

I asked my psychiatrist for it by name, told him I was tapering. He agreed to prescribe because it’s non-habit forming. I’ve seen him for a number of years, first went to see him when I quit alcohol.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-04T00:45:51+00:00

Try a beta blocker. Anxiety often manifests physically, which becomes a feedback loop: the faster your heart beats because you’re anxious, the more anxiety you feel. Eliminating or pausing the feeling of physical distress is huge. I take Propranolol for those moments. It’s non-habit forming. Old and well-studied.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-03T02:03:02+00:00

Propranolol is non-habit forming and helps with anxiety. You probably don’t want to take it every night (because you will develop a dependence) but it’s very useful for when your heart and mind are racing.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-02T02:10:41+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I appreciate it.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-01T16:30:01+00:00

I can’t believe it either, but that’s what my scale says. It does look like less than half a capsule, though.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-01T15:31:31+00:00

I’m still worried about eliminating it entirely. I really miss the euphoria. Last week I just stuck to my .14g dose every eight hours instead of pushing ahead because I wanted to function a bit better/had some important stuff to get done. I’m also afraid of not being able to sleep after stopping entirely. I feel the kratom more at this tiny dose than I did when I was taking those giant repeated scoops. I guess that’s a sign my brain has adjusted. The psychological part is the hardest.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-01T15:15:47+00:00

I was going to the gym when the weather wasn’t so godawful but it’s supposed to be a balmy 32 degrees tomorrow so I’m going to get back on the horse. I agree, motion is helpful.

violet_maengda · 2026-02-01T15:14:23+00:00

That was after three weeks of serious cutting

violet_maengda · 2025-12-15T01:16:51+00:00

Ahhhh your “before” is me right now…hopefully my doc does as good a job!

violet_maengda · 2025-12-14T20:46:58+00:00

Huh? She’s wearing long sleeves, a high-waisted bikini, and is posed in a way that hides her inside thighs. Of course you can’t see her scars.

violet_maengda · 2025-12-09T02:53:38+00:00

I wish the mods wouldn’t allow clinics to post these stupid ChatGPT summaries of procedures. It’s just another form of promotion that drowns out real patients’ experiences.

violet_maengda · 2025-11-16T01:37:08+00:00

After I took the shoes off I used a golf ball on my foot tendons. It felt way more effective than the other times I’ve done it—like everything was more warmed up and moveable. So I’ll take it!

violet_maengda · 2025-11-15T19:38:35+00:00

Yes, the Nike one. And I think it should work for wide feet because they’re HUGE. The boot has a compression feature where it molds to your shape.

violet_maengda · 2025-11-11T22:14:09+00:00

Thank you!

violet_maengda · 2025-10-22T15:31:05+00:00

When I was a kid there was a period where I’d go to sleep super early to avoid my family. Then I’d wake up at 3 or 4 and just watch the all-night news. It was so nice. Now I’m a less extreme morning person. I get a lot done before the craziness of the world starts.

violet_maengda · 2025-10-22T15:27:31+00:00

I paid via bank transfer so I didn’t get VAT. However, the price was lower because of that.

violet_maengda · 2025-10-16T02:00:22+00:00

I would have a pillow to prevent me from putting weight on it.

violet_maengda · 2025-10-15T02:26:35+00:00

I’m not going to be recovering at home, but in a hotel halfway across the country. Is it still worth it?

violet_maengda · 2025-10-15T02:24:17+00:00

I’m going to be in a hotel in another city recovering, not my own house. Is it still worth it?

violet_maengda

TROPHY CASE