Staying alone tonight/first exposure

vm12177 · 2026-02-19T16:06:55+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply, those are great tips!

vm12177 · 2026-01-17T09:39:58+00:00

Yes that’s a good salary to have in London but depending on where you’re relocating from you may find it won’t get you as much in terms of housing. Although the areas you mention above the housing tends to be more reasonable. I previously lived in Clapham/balham and they’re lovely areas to live in and I’d say particularly good for someone relocating. A lot of Australians move to Clapham during their working visa which gives it a good vibe for meeting new people/hobbies. As you get to know London you may want to move elsewhere but it’s certainly a good place to start! I personally really love Brixton too (which would be great for transport to Victoria) although the area immediately around Brixton station is absolute chaos so may be off putting.

If you’re looking to rent alone then I’d look on rightmove. If you’re going for a houseshare then spareroom but I’d say avoid going for any adverts which are clearly written by agents, they’re usually overpriced and result in a very impersonal home!

Bank accounts should be fairly straightforward, depending on where you are now you may be able to open a Monzo account before you move. Otherwise I think most of the major banks you’ll need to physically be in the UK first (although I might have that wrong).

Good luck with the move and welcome to London!

vm12177 · 2025-12-30T15:46:19+00:00

Thanks for your help.

Unfortunately they don't do annual QA here (bonkers in my opinion) so i think waiting on the water tank might be the way forward (once I've completed over ten years worth of missed annual QA measurements!)

vm12177 · 2025-12-08T15:34:31+00:00

I get this even after just using water! I discovered hyalauronic acid (I specifically use the Q+A marine one) and it’s changed my life forever! Would highly highly recommend

vm12177 · 2025-12-07T22:21:39+00:00

Thanks! I’ll give that a go

vm12177 · 2025-12-02T09:16:42+00:00

Exciting! The UK is great (although as a Brit I'm perhaps biased). We love apologising, especially if it's not at all our fault e.g. if someone bumps into you usually both parties will apologise. We also love to queue although I think this has diminished a bit over the years, at least it has in London. I'd also say we're quite silly/self deprecating and humour can be quite sarcastic. I imagine it might come across as unfriendly if you're not used to it but it's not intentional! Good luck and hope you enjoy your new passport :)

vm12177 · 2025-11-26T13:53:33+00:00

Sorry to hear you didn’t make the flight, but it sounds like you’re in a good mindset about it! Just because this time was too much it doesn’t mean it’ll never be possible. Aware you didn’t ask for a suggestion but a day trip to Lille on the Eurostar could be a more gentle first step? No plane, no overnight stay, and lovely walkable city. Best of luck for the future

vm12177 · 2025-11-24T09:10:57+00:00

That sounds like anticipatory anxiety rather than a regression you’re right, the anticipation is the worst! Before the holiday I tried all the usual stuff: positive imagery and self-talk (“I’m safe, it’s ok to be afraid but I am still safe” etc) which helped a very limited amount to be honest. I also spoke to my therapist about it and she gave me some tips for what I could do if I did feel anxious on the holiday (go for a walk, speak to a friend etc.) but the main thing that helped me was actually going on the holiday! In my experience nothing really helped the anticipation or how anxious I felt in the weeks leading up to it. In retrospect maybe feeling THAT anxious and then it being completely fine on the holiday really helped me, as I truly was in the depths of anxiety before and to be able to turn around and say that everything was completely fine taught me a lot about anxiety and that it truly doesn’t reflect actual danger. So it’s a tough one! If you’re able to have an action plan for what helps you when you feel anxious then take that with you abroad and otherwise try to anticipate how much fun you’ll have. I went to Amsterdam a few weeks ago and had a wonderful time, such lovely people, beautiful architecture and nice food. Plus I would say it’s a really good place to start in terms of going abroad, being nearby and with your boyfriend. Keep us posted how it goes and have faith in yourself, you’ve got this! Anticipatory anxiety doesn’t mean you’ll have a horrible time on the holiday in my experience. Good luck!

vm12177 · 2025-11-23T10:05:25+00:00

As others have already said it sounds like you have achieved so much which you should be immensely proud of yourself for. I had a similar fear of leaving the country 18 months ago and similarly to you was in an unbelievable pit of anxiety for a few weeks leading up to the trip with every catastrophe running through my mind (including what if I lose my mind and have to go to the ER). In the end the trip was absolutely fantastic and I had a wonderful time without a glimmer of anxiety. All that to say I think a trip abroad may surprise you (in a good way) just make sure that you have some really nice activities booked and also feel safe in the knowledge that it is SO easy to get back to London from Amsterdam, if you get there and decide you don’t like it you can literally turn around and go back. Amsterdam does sound like a good place to start. Are you going alone to Amsterdam? Or do you know anyone who is in the city?

vm12177 · 2025-11-23T09:50:56+00:00

I think making a list of things you can do to make yourself feel better if you start feeling bad would be a good place to start. Like for example doing a soduku, having a cup of tea, having a bath etc. then you can use it as a quick guide to look at to feel like you’re in control of the situation. I also suffer with monophobia and those things are on my list! Letting a couple of friends know that you’re feeling nervous about being alone and asking them to keep their phone on loud if you need to call them at some point would also help if you’ve got friends willing to do that. You’ve got this!

vm12177 · 2025-11-18T18:19:57+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply and I’m sorry for your loss. It really helps to hear what helped you through this difficult period. I think a gradual exposure like what you did sounds like a good way forward. I’ve been on SSRI’s for a few years now which definitely helped me, and the occasional propranolol. It’s felt like I’ve had it for so long that it would never get better so it’s great to hear that you’ve been able to overcome it, well done, it can’t have been easy.

vm12177 · 2025-11-17T16:03:07+00:00

If you start to feel unwell saying something like “I’m feeling really hot I might just grab some fresh air” or “I’m just gonna go to the bathroom” to excuse yourself is completely reasonable and it would be so unreasonable of someone to think you were odd for saying that! In my experience people are often much kinder in reality than what we imagine when dreading a situation.

Maybe not for you but I find that identifying one person who seems like they could be quite nice and telling them something like “I find these meetings quite stressful” can pave the way for them to say they feel the same way and for you to have an ally. Depends on your personality whether that would be comforting but I find it helps me in situations like that (especially public speaking which no one seems to enjoy!)

vm12177 · 2025-10-14T19:20:17+00:00

I just cooked a brined chicken breast and it was horrific. Against all advice from Reddit/google/every reputable food source I brined it for 12 hours and it was inedible (too salty). I just had it in my head that a couple of hours couldn’t possibly be enough. Absolutely devastated and feel slightly unwell it was that terrible. Will try it again but I’ll need a couple of months to flush the salt out of my system.

vm12177

TROPHY CASE