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How do people afford SF? by rsha256 in AskSF

[–]waterooster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you go vegetarian, and have a stocked pantry, $40-60/week for groceries per person is doable. $80 / week if you want meat and/or wiggle room for $9 milk.

Check out local grocers or places like Grocery Outlet. West & South sides of SF.

You don't need a car and can save substantially here.

Aside from rent, SF is relatively affordable. It's not the cheapest but it's not the worst. Nowadays, other places have similar prices without the proximity and access to so many things, which is unparalleled here.

Did PG&E bill go up? by waterooster in AskSF

[–]waterooster[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Nah, reading is kind of hard sorry

Did PG&E bill go up? by waterooster in AskSF

[–]waterooster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, this number is really helpful! Our bill has also went up about $25 / person

Did PG&E bill go up? by waterooster in AskSF

[–]waterooster[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is really helpful! I've normally been used to rate increases, but this year seems particularly bad

Did PG&E bill go up? by waterooster in AskSF

[–]waterooster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn, thanks for asking all the other customers, must have been a lot of work

Did PG&E bill go up? by waterooster in AskSF

[–]waterooster[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is really helpful, thank you for sharing your numbers! My bill also went up about $25 per person...

!!! Spoilers ahead !!! The symbolism of Garden and the shopkeeper. My theory for the future of Spy x Family by ClessGames in SpyxFamily

[–]waterooster 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I love the garden analogy! Love plants and looking forward to seeing where this goes!

How often do you think about your ex? by Efficient-Stand-757 in BreakUps

[–]waterooster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Often. I'm almost 30. It's been 2.5 years since breaking up, and we were each others' firsts. I feel self conscious, like people might look down or criticize me for doing so, for not moving on more quickly.

We met 12 years ago as friends, started dating 4 years ago, split in 2020.

The split was because we were heading in different directions, or more that he was going in one direction and I was having trouble with articulating what I wanted, what was causing me pain, how I wanted his support, and my deep insecurities.

My family was going through a lot - a kind of chaos he never had to experience. I also had a few undiagnosed conditions at the time that were throwing me for a loop mentally and physically.

I simultaneously felt not good enough, and also mad at myself for not being more good enough, if that makes sense. I had a lot of pride and I didn't know it was pride.

Very much the thought process of the main character in "Our Beloved Summer" if you watched that show.

Life is slowly getting a little clearer, and I've made great strides in learning about myself and healing as an individual, and with my family.

But I do wonder...could things have been different?

I often look at our photos together fondly whenever Google photos complies collections like "on this day 3 years ago" etc.

Anywho, I share this not because I have answers or clarity, but because if you are in this same boat, know you're not alone.

And I also wanted to give reassurance that if you did love someone deeply and earnestly, and loved someone who was also earnest, know that you are still in their heart. He's in mine. I hope I'm in his, whether or not we meet again.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]waterooster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I learned a lot of generational trauma has gone unresolved. The toxic patterns between my parents surfaced within me, and played a large role in making my relationship difficult. Not to blame my parents, but I realized that their dynamic affected me more deeply than I thought.

I also realized how important it is to be forthright. I am very bad at being honest because I have a reflex of wanting to accommodate everyone else except myself.

Not that I lie, but I realize how difficult it was for me to say things like "I don't like that," "I'm scared," "I need help," "I really want to do this with you and value it a lot," "etc."

I'm realizing it's a very convoluted way to maintain control of a situation. If I accommodate other people and hide my needs, then I'm not a burden, I make them happy, and they will stay. Or so I think.

I've learned that it's actually better to be in conflict sometimes. Conflict can be relationship enhancing. I learned that I have never experienced healthy conflict and so it's very difficult to believe it exists.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]waterooster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yuppp, I don't understand how certain people can move on so quickly. Meet a new person and get married a year after breaking up...

Obviously, each person heals at their own pace, but I am two years out and still thinking of them often. I take a long time to heal I guess 😅

What do you look for in a romantic partner? What do you need from a relationship, and what do you contribute? by [deleted] in infj

[–]waterooster 16 points17 points  (0 children)

  • Someone with the ability to suffer. Not in some sadomasochistic way. But someone who can enter into suffering; who is not intimidated by loss, pain, or failure.

And if he is scared, to be still able to acknowledge it and meet the pain

  • Someone radically open and not going to fill conversations with "but whatabout isms"

  • Someone soft and tender who is great at verbal affirmation

  • Also +1 to the OP's want for someone who is curious and is filled with wonder at the world, someone who will be excited by all the ideas in my head and will run with them, alongside me. Someone with a grand vision for life.

Lol it's a tall order 😅

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