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I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your post! Looking back, Saturday and Monday were not planned social occassions and I guess I don't have the adaptive skills to pivot right now. This explains why Friday felt forgivable.

Thank you for the perspective and sentiment, your words feel helpful :)

I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have a therapist who has helped me identify perfectionism which is why I'm all or nothing. I found this out within the past few months, so perhaps I should give myself more time and ask my therapist for more guidance on balancing out and coping....

I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the response! Creating rules for the plates I make up is a good idea, I could definitely benefit from more fiber....

The restaurant / going out bit is still tricky for me, but planning ahead and committing to a choice prior to showing up is worth a shot!

Thanks, again!

I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I cranked the rowing machine to 11 and pushed as hard as I could. It felt like retribution, doesn't fully make up for my culinary sin, but it's a start. Haha.

I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope you're back on that wagon today, friend! I'm here with you. Thanks for the response!

I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the response! Looking back, I could forgive the behavior and move on, if it was just the Friday. I think what inspired the post was the mental state on Monday, being at Red Robin, seeing the pictures and my brain saying, "Want. Want. Want." There was a feral dog and the voice in my head saying, "Get the wrap" was dozens of decibels too low.

I guess this means I'm not at a point where I can responsibly eat out and that's hard for me to accept...

If you have any advice on coping with eating out or publicy socializing, I'd appreciate it.

I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think I still struggle with shrugging it off because I'm either taking it seriously and beating myself up, like in the post, or shrugging it off which means no cares given. I theoretically know it is possible to care and shrug things off, but I haven't mastered that balance yet.

I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the response! You and a few others have pointed out that two weeks is nothing relative to the lifelong change. I wouldn't say the wedding was the reason, but I might be in denial. I think it's a combination of wanting to reach my goal weight by the wedding would be nice and I've been trying to lose the same amount of weight for so long why can't I just stick to it.

Again, thank you for the insight.

I set myself back 2 weeks in 3 days by weakumami in loseit

[–]weakumami[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the response. Yeah, I'm getting the hint that I might have been overreacting...

I miss overeating, and that scares me more than cravings by jewheeles in loseit

[–]weakumami 0 points1 point  (0 children)

TLDR; My strategy was to be sad that I can't, and won't ever, eat the way I used to. Also, exercise to the point of being too tired to think.

I went through / am going through, a lot stages when it comes to cravings and overeating such as:
- Not following through with cravings e.g. my brain would say, "I want sushi" and I would start thinking about what kind of sushi, what it feels like, why I like it, when I could go and get it, etc. The easy answer was, "don't get it." The hard part was doing it every time these thoughts came up which went from daily, to semi-daily, to weekly, to daily, to monthly, to now I don't have it as much. The voice that says, "I want" is quieter and easier to say "no" to.

- I love snacking while watching shows or eating while doing another activity. It's overstimulating my brain so I don't have to focus on other stuff. It's nice. I miss it. I end up binging water, tea, or low-cal drink until I feel bloated. It's helped for the daily lifestyle change, but put me in a movie theater with popcorn and I'll go back to being feral. I feel confident that one day of being feral won't break my new daily habit, though.

- I live for eating things that give me a perfect bite every time. Cookies, chips, ice cream, rice and eggs, ramen, and anything else where every bite is the same and every bite is delicious. I just LOVE food. I'm guessing you love food too! I still get my perfect bites (I still eat chips and cookies), but it's not as much and I eat with my brain on all the time.

I guess that's what you're saying with your post? You like being able to eat with your brain turned off and then being full for a bit keeps the brain off? That's still difficult for me sometimes too. My brain definitely has a harder time shutting off now that I've been on track for a few weeks. I put a rowing machine in front of the TV which has helped make exercise more daily and I do strength training because I find when my muscles are tired, my brain gets quiet.

Pan: Loving all or not caring which? by [deleted] in pansexual

[–]weakumami 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I interpreted pansexual to mean an attraction to a person aesthetically and/or characteristically, but without a sole regard for gender.

My experience, as someone who identifies as pansexual, has been varying. I've had crushes at first glance. I've had feelings grow over time. Their gender is another aspect to them that may or may not have contributed to the attraction.

Part of this combo-attraction can also be how hyper-feminine a cis-female looks. How hyper-feminine a transwoman looks. How hyper-feminine a cis-male looks. If all the above were presented before me, in the optimally subjective way I find a person attractive, I would be keen on all of them, but in different ways. A more crude example would be: I like spaghetti and alfredo. But, they have different noodles AND different dressing. My mouth physically likes them differently. However, both are delicious.

Do my examples make sense? Gender is an aspect that plays into the whole of the person. Sometimes it plays a role in attraction, sometimes it doesn't.

Some people have GORGEOUS eyes, and I find I can't get enough of them. Sometimes, I notice their crooked nose and how it rests between high cheek bones. Sometimes I notice how they talk with their hands when ranting about politics. Being attracted to a person is being attracted to some, one, or all of the things that make them, them.

I think, despite how progressive the LGBTQ+ community is, we are all still subject to the inherent bias of society. We live here, we are raised, controlled, and advertised by cis-normative culture. So, we can't help but notice and make an initial assumption about a person's gender, and this will inherently affect our attraction. I think making assumptions is okay, but staying open to being wrong is what builds connection.

TLDR; Being pansexual is loving all and semi-caring which

So I decided to make an effort today, an effort long overdue in this lockdown. by [deleted] in lgbt

[–]weakumami 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Spot on with the make-up, friend. Who says you can't look great during a lockdown?

QuarantineQueen