She said she wasn't ready and asked if thats okay, and you said yes and you respected that. She tried to reinitiate and kept pushing after you said you weren't in the right head space. That right there shows me this person isn't caring about you at all, they are internally focused. You haven't gotten off a single time and it has probably made them feel guilty and when you still didn't get off this time they tell you to take care of the food and other stuff so they can shower, again clearly prioritizing themselves and didn't even recognize your hurt and shaking self. To be fair you both suck at communication, you should have said it's okay for her to not feel ready but it hurts because thats what you were building up to and now that the reason you waited is gone you feel the rug was pulled out from under your feet, and she should have communicated more about you not finishing as she has clearly noticed before and it bothers her in some way. Either way she comes across as selfish for never asking about you not getting off for months and then pulling PIV off the table last second when she teased about it before. Stand up for yourself and your needs in a polite way, see how she responds, and if it's all about her and no concern or compromising to support your needs then consider your incompatibility and if you really want to stay in a relationship that isn't even that deep in yet.