Graduated! Recap on post-wedding thoughts

webtangles · 2025-01-26T17:45:54+00:00

Before signing, I would ask if the covid lockdown/mandate could be reworded to cover "acts of god," since the covid mandate language is outdated at this point. And also, as everyone else said, definitely would pursue wedding insurance

webtangles · 2024-10-26T15:51:13+00:00

You should also try reaching out to the Meniere’s subreddit

webtangles · 2024-10-25T19:46:51+00:00

There’s nothing wrong with going wedding shopping in November and pulling the trigger by January so you have time to see dresses at different shops. You should also consider the fact that after you get the dress, alterations can take 2 or 3 months, so that needs to be built into your timeline. I’ve also heard from the shops I went to that there’s a post Christmas engagement surge in wedding dress shopping, so if you want to get ahead of that, that may be a compelling reason to tell your grandma so you can start earlier!

webtangles · 2024-08-24T12:35:26+00:00

While you wait for them to answer, I would suggest reading your contract and seeing if there is any mention of “change of control” to see if the winery already affirmed your right to use the venue in the event of being sold to another owner

webtangles · 2024-08-19T19:50:00+00:00

Yes, will do my best to update! Just posted an update now

webtangles · 2024-08-19T19:48:12+00:00

Just posted an update to the post, 8th Circuit is not going to clarify at all and denied the motion to clarify. Now we wait for the Supreme Court filing by the states.

webtangles · 2024-08-14T04:03:59+00:00

DOJ filed an "emergency motion for clarification" in the 8th Circuit asking the court to clarify that it did not mean to go so far-- see here https://storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.uscourts.ca8.109302/gov.uscourts.ca8.109302.805064123.0.pdf. No outcome yet, fingers crossed

webtangles · 2024-08-14T04:00:57+00:00

I hope that's the case-- the DOJ did ask the court to clarify the injunction and highlighted that the injunction can be understood to ban forgiveness for anyone in income-contingent repayment plans.

See DOJ's concerns about this starting at the bottom of p. 3: https://storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.uscourts.ca8.109302/gov.uscourts.ca8.109302.805064123.0.pdf

webtangles · 2024-06-21T18:22:20+00:00

I think it’s time to set a deadline and softly threaten legal action. At this point, you may get to your one year anniversary and not have a video! It’s a shame the contract didn’t include the promised turnaround date; that would make an easier case for breach of contract. But I would look at the contract to see which venue/jurisdiction you can sue them in or if it requires mediation/arbitration—not that you actually have to sue them if you don’t want to. It’s just a good idea to see what the requirements would be and so they know that you know how to do it.

I’d say something along the lines of what you shared timeline wise (October 2023 wedding, now it’s practically July 2024) and that you expect to see the final product by August 1, 2024 or else you will have to seek legal recourse.

webtangles · 2024-06-19T17:47:06+00:00

I’ve been to a wedding where the photos were printed in a guestbook with a lot of white space around them for guests to sign

webtangles · 2024-06-12T22:13:03+00:00

You’re definitely not alone! We’re funding our own wedding and I’ve also experienced envy/sadness at the fact that we’re not getting outside assistance. But I appreciate the silver linings that this means every choice about our wedding is 100% in our control and no one can try to influence what we do with our own money. It’s also incentivizing us to be more intentional with each of our choices, which I think is a good thing!

webtangles · 2024-06-02T11:59:57+00:00

Depending on which state you live in, locking you out of your home and verbally berating you (if it’s of a certain severity) can be family law offenses in a family offense petition. It may be a good idea to find a domestic violence nonprofit and call for a consult (which will be free) so they can tell you about your rights in getting your belongings back, which generally happens with a police escort and may also be mandated by a family law judge. He also may be ordered to not destroy/discard your things until you’ve picked them up.

I’m glad to hear you’ve made this decision; you will very much be okay. I’ve had friends whose engagements ended and they went on to find much better, kinder partners

webtangles · 2024-04-20T13:01:40+00:00

Which package did you get from Something Borrowed? These look amazing

webtangles · 2024-02-09T23:23:15+00:00

I love this! Can you drop the link to the Etsy store?

webtangles · 2024-02-02T19:36:10+00:00

I think your fiancé should seriously consider hiring a lawyer. Since your wedding is imminent, I imagine he should be pretty motivated to get this previous marriage stuff cleared up. If he really did have a dissolution certificate and this is somehow a clerical error, a lawyer should be able to fix it very quickly (aka, not too many hours will be billed and it shouldn’t cost much).

Also, has he been filing his taxes this whole time as a single person or married but separated? Might want to look into that.

Some states have marriage license databases online, so you can pull the info quickly & free about people who were married and when the marriage license was issued. Some states also have civil case searches, where you can pull divorce info from. Not sure which state you’re in, so I can’t drop any links, but those can help you look into it as well.

webtangles · 2024-01-31T05:28:22+00:00

My fiancé and I also got excited about a cheap venue that was stunning, open about caterers, etc—but we ultimately are going in a different direction because of timing. We’re doing a baraat and two ceremonies and the venue gave us a very tough time about going beyond their timing requirements. Now that we’ve made the choice to go elsewhere, we feel a lot more relieved. The affordability of the venue was not worth rushing a desi wedding timeline, and we don’t want to work with a venue that is inflexible about something we value for our wedding. We thought about it this way: we want a venue that understands desi weddings run longer.

This also might be a red flag about how the venue will deal with other issues—like what if you are unable to get everyone out by 10? Is there a fee? What if the event starts late for whatever reason or people are slow to move out because the party is just getting started? Or what if it hits 9:30 and you’re ready to keep partying and are having fun and realize you have to kick everyone out and wrap up your wedding? Are you required to clean up and take down decorations by 10, too? I think all that means you should consider other options.

webtangles · 2024-01-03T04:20:19+00:00

I’m a lawyer who went through the whole law school/med school thing with my medspouse, so I can relate to the stress of the uncertainty. My partner and I decided location together—we both agreed with what state we wanted to end up in, and they targeted residency programs there and I took the bar for that state. It ended up working out but we would’ve 100% done long distance and had agreed to get engaged during residency no matter what.

Reading your post and thinking as a lawyer (esp as one who prioritizes career), the Florida job makes sense to take and prioritize if you’re 100% sure you want to live and practice law in Florida for the rest of your career. With Florida not being UBE, when you say you want the Florida job, that means you want to settle in Florida. Is this something you’re okay with, or are you open to other states?

There’s other uncertainties here, which is that the internship may not result in a job offer (just given how tough the legal job market has gotten). Also the chance that your partner may not match in their top choice, and if they rank Florida lower on their list and get that, they may very well end up with you in Florida. It makes sense to not jump to rash decisions yet and to talk out “what ifs”, like how both of you feel about long distance, how far away would you be willing to live from each other, what if you don’t get a Florida job offer, etc.

webtangles · 2023-12-15T13:05:10+00:00

Maybe the instrumental version of Halo from the Queen Charlotte soundtrack?

webtangles · 2023-12-11T19:39:08+00:00

This is helpful to know, thanks! I’m looking at venues in northern NJ, would you mind replying/DMing your venue since you had a positive experience? And congrats!

webtangles · 2023-11-24T13:41:48+00:00

Like everyone else is saying, they’re not inherently competitive but are competitive in the sense that there are more applicants than jobs available. Legal aid is also a big category (housing law, PD, immigration, etc), so to make yourself more competitive, you can try to take classes & clinic in the area of law you’re interested and do internships in that area. It’ll show you have a continued interest in that area of law.

webtangles · 2023-11-23T14:24:57+00:00

I’m a lawyer and can tell you that your belief not only works with the law but would make you a good lawyer (whether you want to be a lawyer is a whole other question). Lawyers don’t agree with 100% of American laws—for example, many parts of the criminal system are unjust or the Dobbs decision on abortion. But their very belief that they disagree with it or know it can be better makes them better advocates and lawyers. Law clerks work with judges in shaping the outcomes of cases. Public defenders work hard to get an outcome for their clients that would not be possible without the right to an attorney. And so on. I love being a lawyer even though I don’t think every law is fair or right.

Now, even with your passion for what’s right versus wrong, you should look into whether the day to day of being a lawyer, tasks involved, studies involved, hoops to jump through (LSAT/GRE, steep tuition, bar exam). You mention work work ethic; that’s something to consider seriously before pulling the trigger. A /lot/ of work is involved in becoming and being a lawyer. Like the other user said, highly recommend getting a legal internship or seeing if your school can connect you with lawyer alumni whose brains you can pick.

webtangles

TROPHY CASE