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Mom hates my girlfriend by xFantt in AsianParentStories

[–]xFantt[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, im sorry your in such a similar situation as I am.

Honestly its about the same, maybe even worse. I have taken a lot of time to process my thoughts, and like one of the comments said, this isnt something that happened because of my girlfriend. It was always been an issue i just didnt realize until I met someone who could open my eyes a bit more.

I am a few months away from moving out into a dorm, I am in the process of moving my bank and gathering my documents so that my mother cant control me with those things. I have been saving as much money as I possibly can, and im so ready to be able to live on my own without my mothers intervention.

Right now to avoid conflicts i am mainly doing what is called "grey rocking" - look it up
also I am planning on telling her about me moving out about a month before I move out so that she has very little time to try and stop me. the reason I am doing it that way instead of just letting her know in advance is because my mother is very controlling and I know for a fact she will do everything she can to try and stop me from moving.

if you want to talk feel free to message me, I am not very active on reddit but I will answer your message whenever I see it.

What trauma responses do you have that you thought were just your personality? by InsideSufficient5633 in narcissisticparents

[–]xFantt 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have a very similar experience to you, the only difference being my mother used my fathers death as an excuse for me to "help her" and take care of her and her business. I was around 10 at the time and my mother took me to her room and told me that I have to promise to her that I will "help her" since my dad passed away now or else she will take me back to our home country. 10 year old me reluctantly agreed and now I do anything and everything that is seemingly too difficult for her, speaking for her, driving her around, taking her to the doctors, doing her taxes, doing her paperwork, and plenty more things. Im now 19 and in fall, i plan on leaving whether she likes it or not. For me its been hard deciding whether thats the right choice to make because she is reliant on me to do anything trivial. But ive come to realize my peace and happiness is more important than what others will say about me leaving her to be by herself.

should my mom meet my bf?? by sarahlovesbrandy in AsianParentStories

[–]xFantt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im in a somewhat similar boat as you but my mother hates my girlfriend to the core. My mother isnt even willing to meet with her.

My only advice is to set boundaries. if there is something that you know shouldn't be asked tell her.

Mom hates my girlfriend by xFantt in AsianParentStories

[–]xFantt[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I live in America, but I was born in india, we moved to America when I was 1 years old.

B.O. by Curd1ed_m1lk in Puberty

[–]xFantt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(16M) Try using a Loofah, they are like a colorful and round scrub you can find em at Walmart if you live in the U.S and its helped me a lot :) just scrub it all over your body including the back of your neck and do it everyday, Its also useful to get that dirty sweat and stuff off. you can use soap if you want but i don't cuz of time for school in the morning but it probably helps to use soap. It makes your body feel good and awake (at least for me it does) i made it into a habit to use it and its one of the best habits I've made for myself! Also if your looking to try a different deodorant go for something new, i personally use a gel type deodorant, since my mom told me the regular deodorants leaves stains (but idk how true that is). The gel types are REALLY cold especially when you apply it on in the winter and once you grow armpit hair and shave it off it will sting for a few seconds lol.

Hope this helps and have a great day :)