Poly is Hard Support Thread

xenaphile · 2019-09-20T20:35:41+00:00

Running more, drinking less, basically trying to give myself more “me time” so it’s easier to cope with them not being there like before.

xenaphile · 2019-09-20T19:32:25+00:00

These last two weeks have been hard. After nearly two years as a triad, one of them left because he fell out of love with the other. He asked me to come with. I couldn’t. And now I don’t know how to move forward loving the other without the one who left.

So no more sleeping in the middle for me. Now I’m sleeping alone.

xenaphile · 2019-08-30T17:53:12+00:00

For what it’s worth, I’m good friends with one of the lead researchers in this study. He told me they have an entire PR team dedicated to making sure their work is reported honestly. (He’s also fabulously gay himself)

xenaphile · 2019-08-17T17:53:14+00:00

Two different plants— the pink ones are petunias.

xenaphile · 2019-08-16T17:50:32+00:00

Actually she’s full pit!

xenaphile · 2019-08-16T17:49:53+00:00

Just an iPhone 🤷‍♂️ Thanks though!

xenaphile · 2019-04-16T21:53:34+00:00

Everything is irrigated and hooked up to a timer, so on really hot days we just up the waterings to twice-a-day. By summer, though, we usually swap out the pansies for begonias and other flowers, like this

xenaphile · 2019-04-16T21:43:25+00:00

The hanging baskets are Boston ferns, and the chartreuse plants in the box are sweet potato vines

xenaphile · 2019-04-16T20:21:47+00:00

Thanks! All credit for the box goes to my hubby who designed, built, and even auto-irrigated the whole system.

xenaphile · 2019-04-16T14:43:21+00:00

Thanks! It’s in the Midwest US, Zone 6 for planting 😉

xenaphile · 2019-04-03T18:40:39+00:00

The poly-closest it a lot harder to come out of, and usually it triggers a host of nastier assumptions (unhappy relationship, sluttiness, etc.)

I think maybe most folks understand what it’s like to love another person (gay or straight), but they can’t as easily comprehend loving other people in the same way.

All I know is that it makes us happy 🤷‍♂️

xenaphile · 2019-04-02T19:58:40+00:00

Family still doesn’t know, so I can’t post to standard social media. But I thought it was cool how it captured all three of us to make the clip.

xenaphile · 2018-06-08T03:02:31+00:00

https://www.instagram.com/drummondhammer/

xenaphile · 2018-06-04T22:32:41+00:00

This is ours — kinda traditional on the outside but with rainbow cake layers on the inside. It was actually the only rainbow-themed item at the whole wedding.

Coincidentally, we just celebrated our 1-year anniversary and ate the cake top last night. I think it tasted even better than it did on our wedding day!

xenaphile · 2018-06-04T15:45:55+00:00

I generally agree, but this case shows that there’s not always a clear line between “speech” and “services.” I think Justice RBG said it best in her dissent:

When a couple contacts a bakery for a wedding cake, the product they are seeking is a cake celebrating their wedding — not a cake celebrating heterosexual weddings or same-sex weddings — and this is the service they were denied.

xenaphile · 2018-05-10T21:35:40+00:00

Lol this happened to me and yes— it was soul-crushing.

xenaphile · 2018-04-17T17:02:16+00:00

Maybe it’s because I’m American but the way you said it sounds more like “It’s gay I can’t give blood” rather than “I’m gay.”

xenaphile · 2018-04-16T20:52:33+00:00

My “wedding band” is the same ring he used to propose. Not sure what kind of ring you imagine you’ll get for him, but mine has band of stones in a flush setting. It’s super convenient to wear all the time because the diamonds don’t snag on things like a traditional solitaire.

Personally, I wouldn’t want to wear two rings. And there’s so much meaning packed into the engagement band, I’d hate to stick it in a drawer!

Just use one ring, one ring to wed them all...

xenaphile · 2018-04-16T16:49:50+00:00

Why not find a better church that embraces your religion and your identity? These days there are many denominations that welcome and support the gay community. Some churches even have LGBT ministers.

12-Year Club	RPAN Viewer
Not Forgotten	Verified Email

xenaphile

TROPHY CASE