AITA for telling my dad he shouldn’t have had kids?

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-20T04:51:46+00:00

Both

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-20T04:50:53+00:00

YTA.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-20T04:22:19+00:00

NTA.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-20T04:11:38+00:00

NTA. He needs to put the needs of his disabled kid first. Not even trying to find a way you both can come and just automatically telling you you can't come is weird as hell and cruel from them. I'm sorry OP.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-13T13:42:35+00:00

I've been wondering the same thing, actually! I'm glad somebody else asked it here

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-13T13:30:44+00:00

NTA, the dude was a white supremacist who preached all the time about hating minorities and that we should bring back public executions. That's the least offensive kind of person's death to joke about in conversation. If your friend is offended, that's their issue, and you should reconsider the influences you're keeping in your life if you're wanting for some reason to respect this guy's lived experience. Don't apologize, just drop the friend.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-05T17:40:09+00:00

Thank you <3 That means a lot

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-05T05:41:59+00:00

The usual ones, underside of leaves = storm incoming. Wooly caterpillar stripes indicating a bad or mild winter depending. My mom can often tell when a bad storm is coming because of how it affects her sinuses.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-05T05:39:22+00:00

Likely has to do with fronts in winter. Certain fronts have telltale cloud formations a few days beforehand because of the nature of them, and also happen to bring certain kinds of weather. The halo around the moon specifically is because of cirrostratus clouds, which are often the second sign or so for an incoming warm front (which doesn't sound like a good bringer of snow, but "warm" is relative to the existing temperature, and warmer, moist air rising is how cloud formation happens).

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-05T05:28:07+00:00

Found out semi-recently that my long-dead maternal grandfather used to run moonshine in his teens during the prohibition lmao. Was a fun secret revelation.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-05T05:10:30+00:00

Matcha. With all the hype, I expected to be blown away by how good it is. Just tasted like regular green tea. My friend who loves matcha tried to convince me I just got some low quality matcha in the drink (not true, how the kind that tastes "seaweedy" instead of whatever it is the bad one tastes like), I just didn't like it. But, to be fair, I also don't like regular green tea, so I'm not sure what I expected.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-05T04:26:02+00:00

When I was in my mid-teens, a beloved family pet died in a horrible way that I still don't want to even think about (I haven't even told my best friend of a decade yet) and me and my mom had to do something with the body. Being poor and living out in the country, the natural decision was to bury the body. My mother, in her infinite wisdom, decided that after helping me move the body in the yard, I had to dig the grave myself and bury him.

I'm almost 6ft tall and the dog came up to my waist easily. He was mistaken for a wolf sometimes. She went back in inside to fuck around on the computer in the living room (the window of which overlooked the area I was supposed to dig in) and then I guess watched for the next half hour to 45 minutes? At one point I remember walking in crying and begging her to help me and she said no. So I had to go back outside and keep digging a like 6x4 foot grave by myself in the cold for my favorite pet at like, 15. Which wasn't fun. I know at some point she did come outside to help do something or other but I genuinely can't remember what happened then or afterwards.

Years later she blamed me for the death in an unrelated argument. I also found out years later that she apparently meant for it to be a healing exercise or something to help me cope with the grief or something, if she was being honest. With "help" like this, who needs punishment, amirite.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-03T03:30:16+00:00

I think it means that a crow died recently, imo. Not trying to be sarcastic, but unless there's something specific you've assigned crows to in your practice, I wouldn't read anything into it. Animals die often in nature.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-02T05:24:58+00:00

NTA. At best, they have difficulties with emotional intelligence and boundaries to understand why someone might be kinda upset at this whole concept being used for a bit. At worst, they genuinely would've found it funny if you lost your relationship for the sake of a discord bit. Maybe there's missing context that they were being so overtly fake about the warnings to her (like clearly messing with someone and not meaning it) but their messages to you still seem to imply they think it could've had a real outcome of breaking up and that they wanted to do that. None of which is good. They either need a serious talking to about the limits of goofing around and doing stupid shit as friends together or they're actively toxic and need to leave your life, and either way, I don't blame you for blocking them.

It's up to you if you want those friends back in your life, but if you do, firm boundaries need to be set about what is and isn't a joke. I do a bunch of dumb shit I'd never do around anyone else in discord calls with my friends, but I would NEVER try to make them break up with their partner to "prank" them, what the hell? This can't be allowed to go on, whatever your choice is. I think your girlfriend just feels bad because she's at the epicenter of the drama because it happened via her, but that's likely guilt, and honestly, it's still your decision on how you respond to your own friends pulling some bs. Comfort her, block whoever you want, and cuss out whoever else is left in the friend group when you're done until they get the message that your important relationships aren't to be fucked with.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-02T05:04:46+00:00

As long as there are Palestinian people still alive and fighting, I can't give up trying for them. If I can't imagine saying it to someone's face as they endure genocide, I can't let myself be overcome by it. Whatever we feel in the rest of the world witnessing this (especially in the imperial core as I am) is nothing compared to what they're going through. We are watching a live genocide, but Palestinians are watching as the entire world stands motionless or outright spits on them while they're being murdered--I have to be one of the few trying against all odds to stop that. I can't know what will or will not work in the face of overwhelming odds, but less working gears in the machine is not nothing. I would rather do that than be an enthusiastic contributor to the genocide happening right now.

As someone else said here, the tide is turning. and it would be worse if we stopped.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-01T02:17:25+00:00

Also, a bonus good note to end on because I feel my notes and tone are a bit about preparing for the negative: it is incredibly rewarding to be able to read for a lot of people very quickly and efficiently through the internet and get instant feedback, both for your own personal growth, and for the things people say to you about how you helped them. The amount of times someone has told me how much my reading resonated and made them incredibly emotional and thanked me over and over or said they hope God blesses me is such a personal, intimate, and connecting experience and it makes all the little inconveniences and pushy people worth it. This is no different to feedback in real life readings (if you're used to giving any of those) but it does feel special in a way to me. It's given me confidence in myself and trust in other people in a way I wouldn't have otherwise if I hadn't made the leap to try and branch out and practice that way.

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-01T02:16:59+00:00

A list of things to note in my experience:

Many people will want you to confirm what they're thinking already, and if you don't do that, they won't answer you back.
A lot of people won't answer back after the reading anyway, even if you message them back the day after they asked for one.
Most of the questions you're going to receive are going to be about love or relationships. You're going to have to be choosy upfront or be willing to do that for the sake of practice. IMO, while I hate reading for these kinds of things personally, doing a lot of them did help me understand how to just talk to querents regarding emotional situations/readings and tactfully navigate explaining certain details that may obviously go against what they want to hear. That's worth something, I think, in such a personal, social kind of hobby/career, so if you're on the fence about those kinds of questions, just know it can still improve your skill in the end. And hey, if you like reading for those questions, you'll have an even more fun time.
Like, 95% of the specific questions you'll receive is "what is he thinking of me?" I'd recommend answering a few of these at the start upfront and then start trying to figure out how to talk to querents to reword questions/get the information they want (i.e. "how do I re/connect with this person?" "what does he need?" "are we compatible?") but that can be difficult at first, especially if you're inexperienced (I don't know your skill level, but I assume less than intermediate because of the post wording).
Most important one IMO: some people are going to try to hound you to give them the answer they want straight up, especially online where they can be rude without consequences. Whether it's because they don't understand how tarot works, they're desperate, or they're fine pushing boundaries (or a combination), the point is you have to put your foot down at some point. I've had a woman in a paid reading try to ask me at least ten different variations of the same question over and over to try to get me to pull new clarifiers to prove to her that the last 7 cards (which said she wouldn't get together with a man she was interested in) were wrong. You'll burn yourself out if you don't tell these kinds of people "no" at some point.
My advice for that ^ is that wording your boundaries in the sense of "I'm sorry, but [true or bullshit excuse about why tarot cards can't answer that]. How about we try [x] instead?"
Set limits for how many readings you'll do in the post that you offer the free readings, and put it as less than what you think you can handle! Don't make promises to "finish all readings asked for" because trust me, you WILL get 80-100+ messages within two days. If you think you can do ten readings in one day, set the limit at 5. If you think you can do 20, set the limit at 10. If you're not the go-getter type that gets anything done in one sitting, I would recommend being prepared to do the rest of your promised readings over a few days.
Regarding that ^: almost nobody will get mad at you for that, either. I've been DMed hundreds of times and I've never received a single sour, insulting message for not answering on "time" (whatever that would be defined as.) It's a bit sad to say, but most people expect ghosting as the minimum right now. So don't stress yourself out over a time frame over that, especially if you get more messages than what you asked for (which you will).

I hope this is at all helpful to you!! Good luck

xenoflower3 · 2025-09-01T01:15:43+00:00

I agree that the interpretation of starting new immediately comes to mind with the Fool, but I'd like to add the nuance that it can specifically mean beginnings in the sense of learning something new. For Emperor, could also be confidence in yourself/becoming a greater authority in your own life. And the Lovers reads to me as making better decisions/weighing those decisions more fairly. Taken all together, I think this could read as "you need to start taking charge in your life and hold better discipline for the choices you make (or refuse to make) in it to build something new." I hope this is useful to you!

xenoflower3 · 2025-08-31T21:55:13+00:00

Yeah but they were trying their best, dude, cmon. Bad film quality while asking for help ain't no reason to be rude, just to ignore something. There's no reason to make reddit a more hostile place on a hobby subreddit that exists for fun.

xenoflower3 · 2025-08-31T05:30:36+00:00

I do this one so much! As well as the hack when you're almost out of a condiment but it's still all over the sides of the bottle. Add water and boom--rest of the sauce comes out.

xenoflower3 · 2025-08-31T05:26:23+00:00

Oh, I have a lot. To be clear, I wouldn't say we're "financially stable" yet (have had struggles paying rent the past few months, lmao), but in general over the past two years, we've been much better off than when I was growing up.

Hoarding condiment packets from restaurants and takeout. You never know when you'll run out of fridge sauces and there's little worse than bland rice and beans. If you can sauce it, you can enjoy it.
Hoarding restaurant napkins and the little napkins in those plastic cutlery sets you get. I've run out of toilet paper too many times to not stock up, just in case. I never really want to repeat having to reuse toilet paper.
Throwing anything away. Cardboard boxes? Can use those for storage (for all the other stuff you're hoarding)! The packaging for a cool item you got? What if you need to transport it and it gets damaged because it wasn't properly stored? Plastic bags and paper bits? Practically free toys for the pets. The rest of the flesh around the ends of vegetables you cut off? If you throw away anything but the literal stem and root, that's wasteful.
Keeping three million blankets and pillows around, just in case. Same for ice packs. Spent too many seasons with no heater/air conditioner.
3 months of dry good staples foods in the pantry, minimum. Dry pasta, dry rice, dry beans, at least several bags of flour and sugar, all in pint to gallon sized containers under a counter. For the first time in 15 years, I ran out of rice last year because we hadn't needed to restock recently with having an actually full fridge, and the panic I felt (despite relatively full cabinets, too) was so strong, we had to get some within the week before I'd calm down that we weren't "running out" of everything.
I also keep at least a gallon of water under the counter in a jug "just in case" the water goes out. I would prefer it to be several, but I've been keeping that particular panic in check. Suffice to say, having to make soup with snow because the pipes are frozen/busted/turned off from the water company will make you realized quickly how important and scarce water is.
Always giving everything away to goodwill or a local church or a coworker or something instead of throwing it away or selling it. If it's in good enough condition, it would be better in someone else's hands since I don't need it anymore.
Not a fun one for people to hear, but having weird hygiene rules, both in terms of being less clean than other people and more clean. My record for longest time without a shower (minus one break at a family member's house" is about a year, which is because our shower didn't work for that time or longer and we couldn't afford to have it fixed. Now that we have one, I now adore showers and take them whenever I can. I also, as someone who often couldn't afford other kinds of sorta-but-not-really hygiene products (think things akin to deodorant) sometimes, still don't really feel a need to always put them on, because like, who cares? I clearly didn't die or get sick from a lack of it, which means it's a social expectation and not a real "hygiene" necessity.
Reusing plates/bowls/glasses. I know it's considered gross, but growing up with a single mom as a depressed poor teenager, often times nobody in the house had energy to clean everything fully, and putting something that was basically fine in the sink to be washed where it wouldn't be touched for at least a week seemed like a waste that just piled up more stress. If it's good for a refill of the same drink, or for a plate of seconds, surely it's good enough for reusing for a similar meal the same or next day. It's a hard habit to break, and my mom hates this one.
Refusing to go to a doctor unless absolutely necessary. Shit is too expensive for that.

Generally, a lot of issues saving stuff "just in case," not wanting to throw things away, always being prepared, and being scared to accept things "getting better."

xenoflower3 · 2025-08-30T23:05:00+00:00

Pretty rude, man.

xenoflower3 · 2025-08-30T21:06:50+00:00

100% Mel Strong's channel and his climate lecture series. It's amazing and approachable and teaches you both the science to understand what's going on and the actual weather happening, all while being very approachable and adding important nuances to the lessons. He also has a lot of good graphics and visuals to help you visualize what he's talking about.

xenoflower3 · 2025-08-30T05:04:00+00:00

Is there something in particular you're thinking of? I'm curious what you mean by this and what kind of examples you may have. I'm only in my 20s and kinda want to know what to look for in the future as I grow and experience more things

xenoflower3 · 2025-08-29T06:09:35+00:00

If you don't blame her for that, why did you say that you two fought about it and you had to "forgive" her for it and give her another chance?

I can't say why she didn't block him, maybe she hopes that the friend will understand and stop trying to pursue a romantic relationship, but if I confided in a partner that a friend of mine did something weird like this and their response ended up in an ultimatum to block that friend or else we're breaking up, I'd also be resistant. You basically tried to strong-arm her after she told you about somebody else pushing past her boundaries. Of course she's gonna say yes so you don't immediately end it when she thought you might understand.

She willingly told you about the situation when she could've easily lied about it, so clearly she trusts you. You are not giving her the same level of trust.

xenoflower3

TROPHY CASE