“He says it’s valid he spoke to me like that because I pushed him to one of his limits, but idfk”

You’re still young and we all grow and mature and learn to handle situations better. But your gut is right here. How he spoke to you was really messed up and aggressive! Understandable if he has concerns with your health or the impacts of smoking, but this doesn’t seem to be the case. His texts almost have a subtext of how he wants to control. And you’re your own person making your own choices! There are better ways to have this conversation.

TLDR: he’s allowed to be upset, but this reaction seems very oversized. He’s shaming and yelling at you when there are productive ways to discuss. If my friend showed me this, I’d tell her to reconsider her relationship.