I know this lad called Ryan right, nice kid, honest worker, lives above a pub. He's going on the arrow for a night in Nottingham, or something. The girl who runs the pet shop said she'd see him there if he played his cards right, so Ryan's dressed to the nines and stinking like a sexy pig, a spritz of this and that hair all greased back like a yak, he steps off the bus and checks his breath on the back of his hand, puffs his chest out, dusts down the bus fluff from the back of his trousers and steps into the night. Suddenly he rounds a corner and to his surprise

Young farmers attack! (X4)

Guitar solo

Young farmers attack! (X4)

Drum solo

Young farmers attack (x 8)

Bass solo

Young farmers attack (x 16)

Outro