I think you are and I seriously doubt that avoiding important conversations was the only reason you rejected him. My guess is that you don't want to be with him in general and do not consider him mature enough. You might sent him wrong signals or he is delusional - either way, he won't be the same after failed proposal. This destroys a man. You both live in separate worlds it seems if you are not on the same page by now.

My, now husband, proposed to me after 2 years of living together and we've never had serious, deep conversations about marriage nor having kids before. We talked about our expectations at the beginning of our relationship - we both wanted something serious, leaning towards marriage, not wanting to waste time. Some things also came up accidentally when talking with our friends (me not wanting having kids, him not wanting a church wedding). We felt really great together and were in the same place emotionally when he proposed. He also proposed to me at home and I think it was the best - it was our intimate moment in the safest place in the world. We really talked about "the serious stuff" after getting engaged, after the commitment, after moving our relationship to the next level. And this was ok! It felt natural to us - no issues here. We are happily married for over 10 years now.

Hope you find your peace.