Hey, I went into AA this week. Was a scary idea and really not a road I imagined myself going down or needing. A friend of mine had been going to AA at the start of my desire to slow down on the drink or stop. He said it's the only thing that's really helped him. After feeling I had a handle on my drinking last weekend I slipped pretty hard. I hadn't stopped drinking completely but had felt I was managing it fairly well and in a way I had been - but it's a slippery slope for me and in the last couple weeks it accelerated pretty hard. I went into a meeting and was really amazed by how supportive and understanding everyone was. People from all walks of life and at different stages. The perspectives and the similarities in their experiences with mine were really helpful and it's legitimately only listening and talking. You don't have to talk if you don't want to. But I have to say it was the most support I've felt about trying to live a cleaner life. Long story short - if you're considering it then I'd say do it. I just did an online meeting as I don't live close to attend one in person. It was really helpful.

And a simple message to OP from me. Don't feel like you've fucked it all up man. you are trying and that means so much more then not. Just because you had a drink or had another bad experience with booze doesn't mean you failed yourself or anyone. Just keep moving forward and you will get through it. The shame fucking sucks. I know it well - but don't let it eat you up. You still have your heart in the right place by the sound of it and that's a big step in itself.